Dennis retired from Boeing Satellite Systems after a 30-year career in manufacturing. Born in Ohio, Dennis is a California transplant with a bachelor's degree in history and an MBA. A self-described "humble investor," he likes reading historical novels and about personal finance. Dennis has written more than 100 articles and blog posts for HumbleDollar.
The Wrong-Sided Man by Dennis Friedman
40 replies
AUTHOR: Dennis Friedman on 5/8/2025
FIRST: DAN SMITH on 5/8 | RECENT: Lester Nail on 5/10
Market Turmoil by Dennis Friedman
29 replies
AUTHOR: Dennis Friedman on 4/7/2025
FIRST: Jonathan Clements on 4/7 | RECENT: Nick Politakis on 4/12
Finding Your Balance by Dennis Friedman
23 replies
AUTHOR: Dennis Friedman on 4/4/2025
FIRST: luvtoride44afe9eb1e on 4/4 | RECENT: Norman Retzke on 4/8
When You Can't Take of Yourself By Dennis Friedman
35 replies
AUTHOR: Dennis Friedman on 3/19/2025
FIRST: mytimetotravel on 3/19 | RECENT: mytimetotravel on 3/23
What Would You Take? By Dennis Friedman
32 replies
AUTHOR: Dennis Friedman on 3/13/2025
FIRST: Jonathan Clements on 3/13 | RECENT: Doc Savage on 3/17
All In the Numbers by Dennis Friedman
11 replies
AUTHOR: Dennis Friedman on 3/11/2025
FIRST: Jonathan Clements on 3/11 | RECENT: Norman Retzke on 3/13
Two Innovations That Can Improve Your Health by Dennis Friedman
26 replies
AUTHOR: Dennis Friedman on 10/3/2024
FIRST: Dan Smith on 10/3/2024 | RECENT: Brian White on 10/11/2024
My Senior Moment
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AUTHOR: Dennis Friedman on 6/23/2024
FIRST: Jonathan Clements on 6/23/2024 | RECENT: Chuck BV on 7/3/2024
I’VE BEEN THINKING a lot about my mortality. I’m sure it has to do with Jonathan’s battle with cancer, along with losing some close friends over the past few years. Maybe that’s one reason I’ve been thinking about contacting some long-lost friends.
Roger was a college friend who I’ve considered getting in touch with. I believe I’ve found his current address, and I was going to reach out to him by sending him a Neil Young album with my phone number attached.
MY WIFE WENT TO New York for five days with a friend. I don’t mind because I could use the rest. Over the past year, we’ve traveled from the West Coast to Europe three times, flown across the country to visit my sister and brother-in-law in Tennessee, and taken a number of car trips.
My wife loves traveling and has a lot of energy. Because of all the air miles she’s logged, she’s now qualified for United Airlines Premier Gold status.
MANY FINANCIAL planners say you shouldn’t look at your investment portfolio too often because it may prompt you to make poor decisions based on short-term stock market performance. I try to follow this advice, even though it would be easy for me to take a peek, because we have almost all our money with Vanguard Group.
Ever since we consolidated our investments, I’ve noticed a change in my wife’s attitude toward money: Rachel is more willing to spend.
LIKE OTHER FOLLOWERS of HumbleDollar, I look forward to Jonathan’s Saturday articles. I have to admit that my interest has been heightened by his cancer diagnosis. Not many folks would have the courage to write about what’s going through their mind when they’re fighting for their life. We don’t often get this kind of insight into someone’s life.
Jonathan has probably received a lot of advice about treatment plans and the doctors he should see.
PEOPLE WHO KNOW ME say I’m sentimental, and they’re right. I like visiting places like my elementary school, the house where I grew up and my first home away from home. They bring back fond memories.
As I’ve grown older, I’ve become more nostalgic, and it isn’t just me. I heard that the ashes of my childhood friend Brian were spread over our grade school grounds. He must have had a touch of nostalgia,
AFTER WATCHING MY wife bake a loaf of wheat bread, I thought I’d try making my mother’s cornbread. Luckily, I kept her recipe, along with those for some of her other delicious dishes.
My mother’s recipes can bring back cherished memories—like the time I visited my parents when they still had their dog. Brandy would always greet me when I walked in the front door. She’d jump up and down knowing I would give her a treat.
I’VE BEEN HAVING DOUBTS about some of the financial decisions I’ve made. I don’t know if it has to do with age. They say you tend to lose confidence as you grow older. Life-altering events, such as the death of loved ones, health issues and retirement, can weigh heavily and sow doubt.
For instance, I’ve been thinking about whether I should have sold my condo in 2020, during the pandemic. If I’d kept it, it would be worth quite a bit today.
I TOOK MY REQUIRED minimum distribution, or RMD, at the end of July. I was planning on taking it at the end of the year, but my allocation to stocks was more than five percentage points above my target of 40%. I thought selling some of my stocks would be a good way to rebalance my portfolio and fund my RMD, so I sold a portion of my overweight in Vanguard Total Stock Market ETF (symbol: VTI).
I SENT HUMBLEDOLLAR’S editor an email saying I was taking some time off from writing for the site. I really didn’t think I was going to write again. It wasn’t because I didn’t enjoy it. Rather, I thought I didn’t have anything to say that I hadn’t already said. But when I read Jonathan’s June 15 article, I was inspired to write about friendship.
Although I’ve never met Jonathan in person, he feels like a dear friend who I’ve known for many years.
AS WE GET OLDER, some of us have less patience and complain more. Maybe it’s because we’re frustrated. Many everyday activities become more difficult to perform as we age. As a 73-year-old, I probably have a shorter fuse when dealing with life’s daily hassles.
My friend Bill might also fall into the cranky category. He was complaining about how terrible customer service has become since the pandemic. “Prices keep rising, but we keep getting less in return,” he ranted.
IF YOU’VE READ MY articles, you know I don’t respond to readers’ comments very often. It’s not because I’m quiet or shy. Rather, it’s because I like to be thoughtful in my responses, rather than firing off a quick one- or two-sentence answer in the comments section.
That brings me to four comments that I’ve found myself pondering, often months or even years after the article appeared. Here’s my belated response to each.
Trading up.
EVER SINCE I RETIRED, mornings are the best part of my day. I always go for a long, quiet walk before sunrise. The only person I usually see is Mark, walking his dog. It’s a great way to start my day. By the time I get home, my wife is up and we have breakfast together.
Last week, I had coffee with Eric, Rob and Craig. We met at a Starbucks in the neighborhood where I used to live.
I ALWAYS THOUGHT my father was a brave man. It wasn’t just because he served in World War II. It had to do with a few incidents that I witnessed.
I’ll never forget when my dad and I went to McDonald’s for a late evening meal. I was probably in the eighth grade. I believe my mother was working late that night. It must have been a Friday because a lot of teenagers were hanging out in the parking lot.
ONE OF MY BIGGEST retirement surprises: how difficult it is to maintain a robust social network.
My wife and I decided last Thanksgiving to travel overseas. In the past, we would have spent the holiday with family and friends. But now, most are no longer near us—or with us.
My mother passed away about four years ago. Afterward, my sister and brother-in-law moved to Tennessee to be closer to their son. My cousin Barb and her husband moved to Florida to be near their daughter.
I DIDN’T ALWAYS LIKE my retirement. After I quit my full-time job, I briefly went to work for another aerospace company. It seemed like the perfect arrangement for a retiree: just 16 hours a week, with the luxury of setting my own schedule.
But it was the same old pressure cooker environment that I’d wanted to get away from. Although I was working fewer hours, it didn’t feel like I was retired. Instead, it felt like the same old grind.
I DROPPED OFF OUR Honda Civic at the dealer for routine maintenance. A young Uber driver gave me a ride home in his new Tesla.
I was embarrassed when he picked me up, because I couldn’t figure out how to open the car door. I told the driver I owned a Honda Civic, not a luxury car. “Those Honda Civics are good cars,” he said. “That was the first car I owned.”
Our conversation seemed backward to me.
I’M STILL KICKING myself for not getting a new Medicare Part D prescription drug plan during the enrollment period for 2023, even though our premium had gone up significantly. Most people, it seems, are like me: They stick with their current plan, rather than shopping for one that meets their needs at a lower cost.
For 2024, I vowed to do better.
Medicare’s open enrollment period ran from Oct. 15 to Dec. 7, 2023.
I TRY NOT TO WORRY too much these days. Although I’m retired, it doesn’t mean my life is carefree. There’s always something I could worry about.
After all, as we age, we tend to have more health problems to fret about, and just as many money issues. We can also find ourselves alone for the first time in decades without our partner, the stabilizing force in our life.
My mother worried a lot after my father passed away.
WHEN MY DAD HAD cancer, we’d take walks through the neighborhood. One day, on our stroll, we met a neighbor, Ted. My dad introduced me. “This is my son, Denny, he’s taking care of me.”
Ted gave me a smile and said, “I hope my son will take care of me if I need help.”
Not long after that conversation, my dad was in hospice care. My mother and I were standing over his bed.
I’VE LONG THOUGHT that my life has gotten better as I’ve grown older. At age 72, I can honestly say the past few years have been the best time of my life. I’ve never been this happy.
But I’m beginning to believe that my best years may soon be behind me. Maybe from here on things will trend in the other direction—because what makes me happy might be hard to hold on to as I age.
MY WIFE CALLS HER 99-year-old mother every morning. One morning, her mother asked, “Are you making big things happen?” After Rachel reminds her mother that she’s retired, her mother asked, “How do you make money?”
Although I chuckled when I heard the conversation, those two questions are probably on most folks’ minds as they prepare for retirement. First, how are they going to generate enough income to fund their retirement? Second, how are they going to stay busy doing meaningful activities?
MY WIFE KEEPS COMING up with ideas for where we should travel next. She says, “How about New Orleans, Savannah or Charleston?” My wife can’t get enough of traveling. I’d rather hang around the house for a while.
This year, we experienced long flight delays on our last two trips back from Europe, so right now I’m not anxious to get on another plane. The most recent headache was our flight home from Ireland.
WE USUALLY HAVE Chinese food every Wednesday. It’s our weekly night out for dinner. While waiting outside our favorite restaurant for a table, I heard my wife call out, “Hey, Doe, our table is ready.” That’s what my wife calls me. It’s my new name. She used to call me Dodo. Now, she’s shortened it to Doe.
How did this nickname come about? One day, I called myself a dodo for a silly mistake I’d made.
MY WIFE AND I TOOK a two-week trip to Ireland. We flew to Dublin and stayed at the Hotel Riu Plaza. If you’re ever on the run and need a hiding place, just ask for a room on floor 2C. They’ll never find you because of the strange floor plan. All things considered, the Riu Plaza is a fine hotel at a reasonable price, with a good buffet breakfast to start your day.
After touring Dublin for four days,
WHEN I RETIRED, I thought about creating a website and writing about my retirement. I looked into what it would take to build a site and have someone edit my work. The more I thought about it, the more I realized the only ones who would probably visit my site would be my sister, brother-in-law and maybe a few curious friends. It wouldn’t be worth the time, effort and money—especially when HumbleDollar offers all the benefits an unknown and inexperienced writer needs.
AS I MENTIONED IN an earlier article, I’ve been writing for HumbleDollar since 2017. Along the way, I set a personal goal of writing 100 articles, not counting the 36 shorter blog posts I’ve penned. This is my 99th article. I’m almost there.
It may not seem like a lofty goal to many people, but to me it’s been a challenge. After I wrote my first article, it took me a year to write another one.
MY WIFE IS OUT OF town for a while, so I have a lot of free time on my hands. I asked Carl, an old schoolmate, if he’d like to have lunch. I thought it would be a chance to give Carl a couple of copies of the HumbleDollar book, My Money Journey.
I didn’t think Carl would actually read the essay I wrote, let alone the whole book.
WHAT’S THE BEST DAY of the year to retire? Many people think it’s Dec. 31. But I used to think my ideal retirement date would be the day in February when the Cleveland Guardians played their first spring training baseball game. What better way to start my retirement than seeing my childhood baseball team in Arizona get ready for the upcoming season? When I wasn’t watching baseball, I could visit the Grand Canyon and Sedona.
I’M ONE OF THE 30 writers who contributed an essay to My Money Journey. As the book’s publication drew closer, I found myself worrying about how readers would react to my story.
Will they see me as someone who saved a lot of money because I was thrifty—or because I was cheap? As I mention in the book, I was embarrassed about my spartan lifestyle, including the crummy apartments I lived in and the cars I drove.
MY WIFE AND I VISITED Italy this year. We flew to Venice, where we stayed three days, and then hopped a train to Florence, where we spent the next five days. After that, we rented a car for three days and toured the Tuscany countryside, before catching a train to Rome for our final six days.
I learned a lot about Italy, but I also learned some things about myself. Here are 11 takeaways from our trip:
1.
I WROTE MY FIRST article for HumbleDollar in 2017. I’d been retired for nine years and I had plenty of material. I’d made a lot of mistakes with my money over the years.
I was truly a humble writer then, and I still am. My early articles weren’t my best. It was a learning experience. I wrote them using the notes app on my old iPhone 5—an app that was designed for jotting down quick thoughts,
WHEN I TOLD MY employer I was retiring, I received phone calls from coworkers I hadn’t heard from in years. One of them was Peter. We were hired about the same time.
Peter congratulated me, and said he’d be retiring too—if he’d joined the company’s pension plan. For some reason, like a few of my other coworkers, he never took advantage of the benefit, which required employees to make regular payroll contributions.
Peter did retire about five years later.
WHEN I RETIRED, I thought a successful retirement was primarily about money—about making sure I had enough income to fund daily expenses for 30 or more years. But now that I’m in my 70s, my investments don’t seem quite so important to me.
Indeed, other things in my life strike me as just as crucial as my investment portfolio’s size. Some say retirement is like a three-legged stool. No, not the traditional three-legged stool of personal savings,
I’LL TURN AGE 72 this year. Since I’ve retired, my wife and I have had some wonderful experiences. Our travel adventures are full of great memories that I’ll cherish for the rest of my life.
Still, as great as those adventures have been, they aren’t nearly as important to our happiness as living a healthy, pain-free life without physical or mental limitations. That’s something that’s hard to beat. It gives you a different outlook.
I GOT AN EMAIL last month that also went to half-a-dozen other HumbleDollar writers—those of us who have been the site’s most prolific contributors. It came from HumbleDollar’s editor. His request: Please come up with a list of your 10 favorite articles that you’ve written for the site.
I immediately knew what type of article I’d select—ones that weren’t just about personal finance, but rather were about more than money.
WHEN I LOOK BACK at 2022, my wife and I had a good year. We avoided COVID-19 even as we did things we’d been yearning to do for a long time. We enjoyed our time traveling, and visiting family and friends. Even doing the little things that we take for granted was a pleasure. Indeed, this year felt like a return to normal.
Of course, everything hasn’t come up roses. Our investment portfolio is down 12.6% as I write this article.
WHEN I WAS IN MY 20s, I was lucky to work for a company that offered a pension plan—and that put me on the road to retirement. Today, unfortunately, company pensions are rare. How can you ensure a comfortable retirement? Try shooting for these age-related milestones:
Age 25. Start saving at least 15% of your gross income. As I mentioned in an earlier article, a Fidelity Investments study found that if you save 15% of your gross income every year from age 25 through 67,
WHEN I WAS AGE 10, we moved from Ohio to California. My father got a job by answering a help wanted ad in a local newspaper. When we first arrived in 1961, we lived in a 36-unit apartment building in Inglewood. It’s located about two miles from the Forum, where the Los Angeles Lakers and Kings sports teams used to play their home games.
One of our neighbors in the building was an older gentleman called Jack Tarentino.
I DECIDED TO TAKE a peek at our investment portfolio. I try not to look too often. But I was curious to see how our assets were holding up in this bear market.
What did I learn? Our retirement savings were down more than $500,000 this year, thanks to a combination of investment losses and our spending. Most of our shrinking balance is the result of falling stock and bond prices.
Still, our spending this year on travel has increased sharply.
I WISHED I HAD MY friend Chuck’s memory. He can remember things from our college days as if they happened yesterday. My memory isn’t nearly as good. There are, however, a few moments I’ll never forget.
I remember in high school when a classmate asked a girl, who was also in our class, if he could have her leftover orange peels. I knew Floyd well enough to know he went to school hungry some days.
WHEN I TURNED AGE 24, a friend and I took a road trip from San Francisco to Vancouver. It was 1975. I was excited—it would be my first visit to Canada.
I didn’t know what to expect when we got to the Canadian border. All I knew was we didn’t need passports. The border officer gave us a suspicious look. After being on the road for a spell, we didn’t look our best. I was unshaven and wearing my usual T-shirt and jeans.
MY WIFE AND I GET together occasionally with our neighbors for a glass of wine. We became good friends with Larry and Kathryn since they moved into our neighborhood. They‘re retirees, just like us.
When visiting them, they often serve cheese and crackers. One day, Larry said to me, “Try one of these whole wheat crackers. They won’t hurt you. I can’t say the same thing about the cheese, though.” He knows I try to eat healthily.
WHEN I RETIRED IN 2009, I had two main goals: I wanted to buy a used Volkswagen van—and I didn’t want to touch the money in my tax-deferred retirement accounts. Instead, I wanted to let that money compound for as long as possible.
What was so important about the VW van? When I was growing up in the 1960s, those vans were a symbol of freedom. While I was in college, I remember a friend spending most of his days surfing.
I CONTINUE TO LOOK for ways to simplify my life. At age 71, I want fewer things to deal with and to worry about. To that end, here are five steps that my wife and I are taking:
1. Consolidating finances. I mentioned in an article last year that my wife and I have consolidated our investments at Vanguard Group, while our savings and checking accounts are at a local credit union.
I HAD SOME GOOD bosses and some bad ones over my 35-year career. The worst was Joe. He tried to intimidate you. I once overheard him tell another manager that he likes to ride his employees and dig his spurs into them.
What was so terrible about Joe? It wasn’t that he was tough on employees. It was that he was unfair. You incurred his wrath whether you deserved it or not.
I remember the first time I attended a meeting held by Joe.
I WOKE UP THIS morning at 4:15 a.m. I don’t need an alarm clock. My internal clock makes sure I’m up at that time.
I hopped out of bed and did a quick shave with my electric razor. I put on my running shorts, shoes and T-shirt. I headed down to the kitchen. I ate half a toasted organic sprouted-wheat muffin with a thin layer of peanut butter and a small portion of a banana.
EVER SINCE COVID-19 disrupted our lives, I don’t go to the gym that often. I usually work out on my own. When I go, I sometimes see Tony. Tony is still Tony. He’s a chronic complainer. It’s usually about little things.
The other day, he was chatting with a woman at the gym. While Tony was talking, she gave me a smile. It was her way of warning me that Tony was complaining again.
I MENTIONED IN an earlier article that my wife and I were planning a trip to the U.K. Before we went, I thought I better see my primary care physician. I didn’t want any medical surprises. We’ll be gone for five weeks. A lot can happen to a 71-year-old during that time.
My doctor retired a few months ago, so I decided I’d go see my mother’s old doctor. He specializes in geriatric medicine.
MY WIFE AND I ARE traveling to the U.K. This will be my first time in England, Wales and Scotland. We’ll spend a week in London before taking a train to Cambridge, where we’ll rent a car for the balance of the vacation.
My wife planned the trip, doing an enormous amount of research. It took her a couple of months to put this adventure together. I thought we’d be staying mostly in major cities with well-known attractions.
I’M NOT SOMEONE who pats himself on the back when he does something right. I’m also not someone who takes compliments well. But this time, I want to toot my own horn.
After four years, I can finally say I’ve accomplished a goal that I’ve worked toward for many years, but was unable to achieve. It wasn’t easy. It took a lot of discipline and composure.
To accomplish this feat, I tuned out cable business news.
MY WIFE DECIDED TO sell the house she bought before we were married. We’re both retired and I view it as another step in our ongoing efforts to simplify our financial lives as we age.
My wife and I interviewed a real estate agent who was recommended by a friend. Steven suggested we do some minor repairs before listing the house. Steven also gave us his opinion on the sale price. He told my wife she had a nice little starter home and we should list it in the middle of the estimated price range.
EVERY SO OFTEN, I see comments on social media about Vanguard Group’s Personal Advisor Services (PAS). One person posted that he’d talked to a growing number of people who quit PAS. There was no particular reason given for why they left. But I don’t doubt it. I’m a PAS client. I’ve often thought about terminating my relationship.
I’ve been with PAS since 2018. When I first joined, the PAS advisors made a few changes to my investment portfolio.
IN THE EARLY 1990s, my employer—an aerospace manufacturer—sent a small group of employees to Winnipeg, Canada, to help set up a production line. We were chosen because of our familiarity with the product involved.
The company provided us with a furnished apartment, a rental car and $40 a day for food. They flew us back home every two weeks, so we could take care of personal business. I’d fly to Los Angeles on Friday and return to Winnipeg on Monday.
WHEN FOLKS TALK about their best financial decisions, they’ll often mention the investments they bought. But my list is quite different. Here are the five best money moves I’ve made during my dozen years in retirement:
1. Updating my estate plan. When I was my mother’s primary caregiver, she was the major beneficiary of my estate. If something happened to me, I wanted to make sure she could afford the care she needed.
I DON’T MAKE TOO many New Year’s resolutions anymore. At age 70, it seems like most of the good ones are for people much younger than me—especially the ones that involve money.
That said, I did have a good New Year’s resolution involving money for the past few years. It was to wait until age 70 to claim Social Security. In return for my delay, I was rewarded with a far bigger check.
If I were a young fellow again,
I HATE BUYING CARS. I can’t think of too many sales transactions that are more loathsome. When I look back at all the times I purchased a car, the one with my father in 1976 was the most memorable.
I needed a new car. I was living in San Diego and often driving to Los Angeles to visit family and friends. My 1966 Volkswagen Beetle couldn’t take too many more trips.
I asked my father if he wanted to come with me to look at new cars.
AS ANOTHER YEAR draws to a close, I sometimes wish I could slow time down. As I grow older, it feels like life is moving way too fast. Maybe the reason is that I’m enjoying life more. I’ve always felt my life has gotten better as I’ve grown older.
Even though we’re having to deal with the fallout from COVID-19, I like my life. I wouldn’t want to turn back the clock and be young again.
I DROVE BY the condominium I sold last year. It was bought by a young lady in her early 20s. I noticed a for-sale sign hanging near the front entrance of the building.
Out of curiosity, I looked up the unit for sale online. It had the same floor plan as the condo I’d sold, but was located on the first floor in the back of the building. The condo I owned was located on the top floor facing the street—a much better location.
WE WENT TO NEW YORK City last month for a vacation. Before we left, I went to my credit union and withdrew money in small denominations. I wanted to make sure I had cash to tip the people who helped us during our trip.
Sometimes, I get confused about who I should tip and how much. It can be a little stressful when you want to make sure you don’t stiff anyone—especially people who are counting on tips to make ends meet,
SOME INVESTORS TODAY are avoiding bonds because rising interest rates could cause the price of bonds to fall. I’m not one of them. Bond funds continue to play a significant role in my investment portfolio. Here are eight reasons I’m sticking with my funds:
This isn’t a good time to sell. Bonds have already factored in the market’s expectation that rates will rise. Interest rates have climbed this year, causing a decline in bond prices.
MY WIFE AND I ARE going to New York City for a vacation. One reason we chose New York: We wouldn’t have to deal with inflated rental car prices. We can walk and use public transportation to get where we want to go. Also, it’s just a fun place to visit.
Trouble is, I’ve been suffering from foot pain and a bum shoulder. The past few months, I’ve been trying to stay off my feet to give my foot a chance to heal,
AS A RETIREE WHO HAS traditional Medicare, my health insurance premiums will cost $4,696 this year. That comes to $391 a month. I’ve had no other out-of-pocket costs in 2021, except Medicare Part B’s $203 deductible.
Here’s how much I’m paying in 2021 for each of my health care plans:
Traditional Medicare: $148.50 per month or $1,782 total
Prescription drug plan: $29.20 per month or $350 total
Medigap policy: $213.68 per month or $2,564 total
I know some people are critical of federal-run programs.
THE OTHER DAY, I did something I probably shouldn’t have done. I checked Zillow to see the current estimated value for the condo I sold last year during the COVID-19 pandemic.
I knew real estate prices had gone up quite a bit since I sold in June 2020. But when I looked at Zillow’s price, I was still surprised to see my old home had risen 19% during that short period of time. It’s hard to imagine,
IF I WERE STARTING my career all over again, I don’t know how well I’d fare in today’s economy. By contrast, if my dad were alive, he wouldn’t have any trouble finding work. He was good with his hands and could fix anything. He was a machinist by trade, but he could’ve easily been an electrician, plumber or carpenter.
All the disasters we’ve endured during the past few years have created an explosion in skilled,
I’M SUFFERING FROM shoulder and foot pain. My doctor said I’ve done too many pushups and run too many miles. He scolded me, saying, “You’re 70 years old. You’re not 30 anymore.”
When I wake up in the morning, the pain radiating from my shoulder and foot makes me feel much older. My dentist also reminds me I’m not getting any younger. When examining my teeth, he noticed severe erosion along my gumline. He said,
WHEN I WAS IN HIGH school, I had a summer job at a machine shop. My job was to deburr large cutting tools known as end mills. I would take a penny and run it over the cutting edge of the tool to smooth it out. Once I finished my job, the tools were sent to another facility for the next operation.
There was a young man in his 20s named Max whose job was to load these heavy boxes of tools onto a truck and transport them to the other facility,
WHEN MY PARENTS were alive, they would ask me what I was going to do with their home when they passed away. I knew they wanted me to live there. My sister and brother-in-law had no interest in the house. They were planning to move to Tennessee to be close to their son.
I never really gave them an answer on what my plans were. They probably never understood why I wouldn’t jump at the chance to live in a bigger house with more amenities in a safer neighborhood.
WHEN I WALK AROUND my neighborhood, I see beautiful and expensive automobiles parked on the street. When I look at the garages where these cars should be parked, they’re full of stuff. I just can’t understand why someone would spend thousands of dollars on a vehicle and let it be exposed to theft, vandalism and severe weather, while their garage is used as a storage unit.
Even though I can still fit both our cars in our garage,
MY WIFE RAN INTO an old acquaintance at our local grocery store. I asked my wife if she was surprised to see her. “No, but she said she was surprised to see me. I asked why. She said she didn’t think I could afford to live here.”
Maybe that’s what most people would have thought, especially if they saw my wife in the neighborhood parking lot getting out of our 2007 Honda Fit.
It’s become extremely difficult for a middle-class family to own a house in California.
WHEN I RETIRED, friends would ask me how I was going to celebrate my retirement. A buddy suggested I take a cruise around the world. Another friend said, “Why don’t you explore Europe?” I did neither. I wound up exploring San Diego, which is about 120 miles from my home. That’s pretty much how my early retirement went. There were no expensive vacations or large purchases.
I didn’t feel comfortable spending a lot of money when I first retired.
MY WIFE AND I are planning a cross-country trip next year, and we need a new vehicle for the journey. The dealer we visited didn’t have a lot of SUVs to choose from because of the global semiconductor shortage. The SUVs in stock had dealer add-ons, such as a $1,900 alarm system and $1,500 for paint sealant. My thought: The dealer was trying to take advantage of the vehicle shortage by adding more options to drive up the price.
IF SOMEONE ASKS ME what my favorite day is, I’d have to say the second Wednesday of the month. That’s when my Social Security check gets deposited into my checking account. I’ve received three checks so far and each one has been a joy. The experts might be right when they say retirees who have predictable income are happier. At age 70, I feel like a little boy who just got his first bicycle.
ON THE NEWS the other day, they were discussing technological change. “It happens gradually and then suddenly,” said the guest commentator.
The commentator was borrowing a memorable phrase from a book written almost a century earlier, Ernest Hemingway’s 1926 novel The Sun Also Rises.
“How did you go bankrupt?” Bill asked.
“Two ways,” Mike said. “Gradually and then suddenly.”
Although this fictional conversation refers to financial ruin, “gradually and then suddenly” is also how most financially successful people accumulate wealth.
WANT A LONG and prosperous retirement? Here are six numbers to pay attention to:
No. 1: Retirement savings. Add up all your retirement account balances and divide by 25. This will give you an estimate of what you can safely withdraw from savings in your first year of retirement.
No. 2: Social Security benefit. To your projected income from your nest egg, add your estimated Social Security benefit and any other retirement income you’ll likely receive.
REAL ESTATE PRICES in California are through the roof. The price of a smaller home in our neighborhood just sold for $80,000 above the list price. Not only is housing expensive for retirees like us, but also the cost of living in California is very high. Gas, food and taxes are a lot higher here than in other places favored by retirees, such as the Sunbelt.
When I was going to school, I was never good at math.
I RECENTLY HAD LUNCH with four friends I’ve known since the seventh grade. Because of the pandemic, this was the first time we’d all seen each other in more than a year. Every time we’re together, I’m reminded of how important my friends were in helping me start a new life when I left home for the first time. Our continuing support for each other is probably the reason we’ve stayed close for 57 years.
IN A FEW YEARS, my wife and I will have additional income, thanks to both Social Security benefits and required minimum distributions from our IRAs. Our thought: Any money we don’t spend from these two income streams we’ll invest for the long term. We wanted to keep this money separate from our other investments, so we opened a new joint brokerage account at Vanguard Group.
We decided to invest our extra cash in the Vanguard Total World Stock ETF (symbol: VT).
WHEN LYING IN BED at night, I sometimes hear the horn from the distant train that once took my wife and me to San Diego. We used to ride that train to its last stop, which was walking distance to our hotel. From the hotel, we would then walk to Petco Park to catch a baseball game. After the game, we’d head over to the Gaslamp Quarter and choose a nice restaurant for dinner.
I SAW MY MOTHER walking through the neighborhood the other day. She was wearing this big floppy hat hiding her face from the sun. But I knew it was her because I can tell by the way she walked. I see her from afar quite often. She drove by me just yesterday when I was coming out of the grocery store. I wonder why she didn’t wave to me. I knew she saw me.
I HAVE TO ADMIT IT, I’m one of those guys who likes to hide money. I have cash hidden in a couple of places in my house and even in the garage. And I’m not talking about a few dollars. I probably have more than $3,000 in denominations large and small tucked in envelopes. I also have a jar of coins.
You might ask, “Why in the world would someone have so much cash lying around the house?” I keep it on hand in case of an emergency.
WHEN I RETIRED, I WAS surprised by how many of my friends and former colleagues had a financial advisor. My thought: Why would folks pay someone else to manage their money when they could easily do it themselves?
But I found out early in retirement that hiring an advisor was a good idea. There’s a big difference between investing while drawing a paycheck and investing without one. When I retired, I realized that the money I was investing was all the money I’d ever have,
I WENT TO SEE MY primary care physician about a medical problem. I actually felt pretty good and wasn’t in any pain. I was fairly confident there wasn’t anything seriously wrong with me, so—when the doctor greeted me and asked how I was doing—I said, “I’m doing well.”
When he responded, “No, you’re not,” I knew this wasn’t going to go well.
I gave him my explanation of what might be causing my physical condition.
I THOUGHT SAYING goodbye to my coworkers, and walking out my office door for the last time, would be the most memorable moment from the beginning of my retirement. But, no, that moment didn’t come until the next day.
I woke up, got out of bed and walked into the living room. Staring out the front window, I felt this sense of calm and peacefulness that I can’t remember ever feeling before. I felt so relaxed that I could swear I was weightless.
I’VE LATELY BEEN having a hard time sleeping—and I have a pretty good idea why. It has to do with two words that keep bouncing around inside my head. If you let them, those two words will also keep you up at night. They’re powerful because there’s no end to them. You ask, “What are the two terrible words?” The answer: what if.
What ifs are about what could happen in the future and,
MY WIFE AND I USUALLY finish dinner by 6:30 pm. She then heads upstairs, while I stay downstairs until 7:30. You can find me walking around in circles in the living room and dining room during that time. I like to think I’m walking off my meal or regenerating new brain cells. You see, I’ve been reading a book by Sanjay Gupta, Keep Sharp, where he points out that moving is good for the brain.
I RECEIVED A LETTER from the Social Security Administration telling me I need to apply for benefits immediately. I turn age 70 this year and there’s no advantage to delaying my benefits any longer.
How does reaching 70 feel? I know I get cold easily and don’t move as fast when I’m exercising. I’m also not as sharp mentally. But I’m actually looking forward to my 70s. It will be a decade more about living and with less thinking about money.
I KEPT THE LANDLINE number that my mother had when she was alive. I thought there might be friends I wasn’t aware of who would try to phone her. Indeed, I received calls from people like Helen who lives in Arizona, Cheryl in Colorado and Jan from Michigan. Eventually, however, the phone went silent, except for those annoying sales calls.
But I still kept the phone number. I just couldn’t give it up. It was costing me an extra $50 a month,
I MADE A SMART financial decision last year that netted me thousands of dollars. What’s so fantastic about this decision is that I didn’t have to do anything. I just sat back and let my investment portfolio do all the work.
If you did what I did and ignored the talking heads, and just bought and held a diversified mix of stocks and bonds, your investment portfolio performed well in 2020. Those who warned about investing in overvalued domestic stocks and low-yielding bonds might be right one day,
I NEVER REALLY LIKED the vehicles that I owned. They were an unimpressive lot, including a Volkswagen Beetle, Mercury Capri, Toyota SR5 pickup, Toyota Camry and Ford Fusion. I would like to say they got me where I needed to go, but that wasn’t always the case. All the cars, except for the Camry, were unreliable, which would sometimes make my life stressful and difficult. Of course, keeping those cars for many years didn’t help.
DURING THE BULL RUN of the 1990s, when the S&P 500 soared 417%, I had a brilliant idea: Why not start an investment club? I invited my father and sister to participate. My mother declined. It turned out she was the smart one in the family. We met periodically, usually on a Sunday, to decide which companies to invest in.
I was serious about this endeavor and determined to make it successful. I even gave our new investment club a name: DSD.
THE HOLIDAY SEASON is here—and retailers will be looking to make up for the sales they lost during the pandemic. Let me offer some advice you won’t hear elsewhere: Go ahead and splurge.
What do I want for Christmas? To be honest, not much. But then again, my wife and I have been spending money in 2020 as if Christmas were a year-long event. We remodeled the house, filled it with new furniture and bought a new car.
I’M GOING TO BE 70 next year and I think I’m in pretty good shape. I do 25 pushups before bed, along with some stretching. I usually go for a long walk in the morning and, once in a while, I might head out for a hike. On top of that, I do strengthening exercises three times a week.
I don’t take medication or have any chronic ailments. Of course, you can never be sure what’s going on with your body,
THE FLU SEASON WAS approaching, so I decided to schedule an appointment with my medical provider for a flu shot. The next morning, I received an email from my prescription drug plan informing me that it was processing a payment for $30.80.
My immediate thought: “How could my medical provider charge me for a flu shot that I haven’t yet received? And why aren’t they billing Medicare?” Medicare provides a free flu shot to every enrollee.
WHEN I WAS GROWING up, I don’t remember my parents talking about the stock market. In fact, I’m not sure when they started buying stocks. It could have been sometime after I graduated from high school in 1969.
When I was a junior in high school, however, I do remember a conversation about stocks between two of my classmates. Brandon was telling Brian that he could buy a motorcycle if he sold some of his shares.
I WOKE UP ONE morning, looked in the mirror and didn’t recognize the person looking back at me. Who is this person? It can’t be me. I’m not the same person I was five or six months ago. I don’t know if it’s the pandemic that caused me to behave differently or if I’m going through some kind of midlife crisis.
No, it can’t be a midlife crisis. I’m almost 70 years old, plus I don’t feel my life is boring,
MY FINANCIAL ADVISOR has been on a mission to reduce my investment costs. He’s been replacing my low-cost, broad-based index mutual funds with the exchange-traded fund (ETF) version. He believes this will improve my investment returns over the long run.
For instance, if you own Vanguard Total International Stock Index Fund—a mutual fund—you’re currently paying 0.11% in annual expenses. But Vanguard’s ETF alternative charges just 0.08%, equal to a savings of three cents a year for every $100 invested.
WE JUST STARTED remodeling our house. I knew it would be an expensive project. Indeed, my next-door neighbor warned me about the difficulty of controlling costs.
He said they netted $250,000 from the sale of their old house. Their plan was to remodel their current home and use the remaining proceeds to pay off the mortgage on their vacation property. But unfortunately, they blew through their remodeling budget and didn’t have enough left over to pay off the other mortgage.
WHEN I WAS IN MY 20s, I joined a large aerospace company. It was my first job out of college. I was an employee who thought all my colleagues were team players working toward the best interest of the company.
Back then, I’d never heard of the term “office politics.” But Ron, my boss, took it to a whole new level. He was an expert at manipulating people.
Ron joined the company a year after I did.
I SOLD MY CONDO last month and the first thing I wanted to do was celebrate. It was such a relief to get rid of it, because owning a second home requires spending precious time maintaining it. At age 69, I can think of better ways to spend my time than looking after a vacation home.
At first, I was reluctant to put the condo up for sale. I had lived there for more than three decades.
THIS PANDEMIC HAS changed the way we live: Many people are physically distancing themselves, washing their hands more often and wearing a mask when they’re around others. But it’s also changed how I think about money—in six ways:
1. Emergency savings. Before the pandemic, I always thought a cash emergency fund equal to six months’ living expenses would be sufficient. Not anymore. The massive economic shutdown has led to millions of unemployed Americans—and it will take longer than six months for many of these folks to find work again.
“MONEY MAKES THE world go round”—and that means we’re constantly making financial decisions. Almost inevitably, some go awry. Like everyone else, I’ve made a lot of financial mistakes over the years. Here are some I wish I could take back.
When I was age 23, I graduated from college with a history degree. It wouldn’t take long for me to realize it was a mistake. Early in my career, I was passed over three times for a promotion because I didn’t have a business degree.
IT’S OFTEN DIFFICULT to fathom what causes the stock market to rise or fall. The market doesn’t always reflect how the economy is currently performing—and sometimes the disconnect can seem huge.
This sentiment was captured in a recent MarketWatch headline: “‘The world is more screwed up’ than the stock market is currently reflecting, warns billionaire investor.” The article was reporting on comments made by Oaktree Capital founder Howard Marks, who told CNBC, “We’re only down 15% from the all-time high of Feb.
I DON’T THINK I CAN do it. I know it’s the patriotic thing to do—support our local businesses. But I don’t see myself visiting local restaurants, movie theaters or department stores for a quite a while.
After they lift the stay-at-home order, I’m not rushing out to my favorite restaurant and ordering a grilled chicken avocado wrap with a kale salad. I don’t care if the waiter is wearing a protective mask and gloves,
IT’S 4:45 A.M. AND another day quarantined at home. Even though I have nowhere to go, I still get up early. It’s one of my favorite times of the day. This is when I go downstairs to the kitchen, make myself a cup of tea, toast some raisin bread and read about what’s happening in the world.
Later, Rachel and I will go for a walk and then have breakfast together. This is how we now lead our lives—sequestered in the house—away from friends and family.
WHEN MY FATHER DIED in 2012, my mother gave me his wedding ring as a keepsake—but I lost it. I turned my house upside down trying to find it. When my mother was alive, I prayed she wouldn’t ask to see the ring, because I didn’t know what I’d tell her.
I felt terrible that I had lost something that meant so much to my father, and I was upset with myself for not taking better care of it.
I MET WITH MY financial advisor last week to discuss my portfolio’s performance in the first quarter. This was the first time I’d looked at my investments since the start of the public health crisis and economic shutdown.
My portfolio, with a target mix of 35% stocks and 65% in bonds and cash investments, was down 6.8% for the quarter, while the S&P 500 was off 19.6% and the Dow industrials fell 22.7%, including reinvested dividends.
ALTHOUGH THE 2020 market plunge isn’t even six weeks old, there are already lessons we can learn from this financial crisis that can help us better manage our investment portfolio. Here are six takeaways from the current downturn, which has left the S&P 500 off 25% from its Feb. 19 high:
1. During a financial crisis, you often hear the phrase, “Stay the course.” It’s meant to encourage investors to stick with their financial plan during difficult times.
WHEN I WENT TO THE grocery store last week, it was packed with customers stocking up on essentials. Carts were filled with items that people couldn’t possibly consume in any reasonable period of time. It’s a scene that’s been repeated across the country.
A friend told me: “When people panic, they want things right away. When people see other people panic, they panic, too.” Like the coronavirus, fear is highly contagious.
I’m not panicking,
STOCKS HAVE YET TO close 20% below their Feb. 19 all-time high, so technically the U.S. market hasn’t entered bear market territory. Still, after this morning’s sharp drop, the S&P 500 is 17% below its peak.
If this decline does indeed become a bear market, how can you prepare yourself? A bear market can be an emotionally gut-wrenching time—one that leaves you feeling vulnerable and helpless. But there are steps you can take to limit the damage to your investment portfolio.
WHAT I FIND surprising about the stock market isn’t its recent dramatic pullback, but how I’ve reacted. I simply haven’t paid much attention. It’s just been business as usual. I haven’t even looked at my portfolio or watched CNBC.
Such a calm demeanor is unusual for me. A few years ago, if I experienced this type of market decline, I would have made big changes to my portfolio. Yet this time around, I just shrugged my shoulders.
I’M SAYING GOODBYE to an old friend I’ve known for 35 years. We had a special relationship that enriched my life in many ways. Although I’ll be moving to a new city and will never see my old friend again, I’ll always be grateful for our relationship, and how it helped me financially and emotionally.
You see, as I put my dear little friend—a one-bedroom, 789-square-foot condominium—up for sale, I’ve come to realize how important it was to have a home that helped me live below my means.
LIKE OTHER WRITERS for this site, I blog often about what’s happening in my own life—my financial mistakes, early retirement, health scares I’ve had, my mother’s death and more. Here are four updates:
Spending. When it comes to parting with money, I have a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde personality. I sit home at night wearing three layers of clothing, two pairs of socks and a hat because I’m too cheap to turn on the furnace—and yet I don’t hesitate to spend hundreds of dollars to be pampered at a five-star hotel.
I’M NOT THE TYPE of person who makes New Year’s resolutions. This year, however, I foresee some major changes in my life—and that’ll require some financial adjustments.
Now that my elderly parents have passed away, Rachel and I can live like a normal couple in our own home. As I mentioned in an earlier article, we will be moving into my parents’ house.
During the last several years taking care of my mother, I was constantly traveling from one house to another and living out of a suitcase.
A FEW MONTHS AGO, I received an early morning phone call from a nurse, notifying me that my mother had passed away. Even though she was age 96 and recovering from a mild heart attack, it was still a shock.
Up to the time of her death, she was mentally alert and determined to show everyone that she belonged at home, not at a strange nursing and rehabilitation facility. She gave it her best,
SOCIAL SECURITY HAS come under political attack over the years. With the federal deficit ballooning, will there be another round of attacks in the run-up to 2020’s election?
I hope not. Here are 15 reasons we should all want to preserve Social Security benefits, no matter which political party we favor:
It helps many. About 63 million people get a Social Security check each month. That’s one out of six Americans.
It provides insurance.
I HAVEN’T BEEN feeling myself lately. Until now, I didn’t understand what had brought this on. You see, I have this different attitude toward money—and it’s changed the way I behave.
Before, it seemed like money was always on my mind. I used to love to read Barron’s every week. Now, I just pick it up in front of my house and toss it in the garage, where it joins 20 other unread copies.
MANY BELIEVE WE’VE raised a bunch of financial illiterates. If people were better educated about personal finance, the argument goes, they’d make smarter money decisions.
North Carolina this year became the 20th state to require high schoolers to take a financial literacy class. Its Lieutenant Governor, Dan Forest, said the new law would “ensure future students, prior to graduating high school, will be more financially literate and economically sound in their decision making as adults.”
But many aren’t sold on the idea that a personal finance class in high school is going to make much of a difference.
AS I GROW OLDER, I realize how important money and good health are. If we have sufficient income to pay our retirement expenses and if our health remains good, we have the makings of something very special.
What is that special thing? It’s the ability to be independent—to live the life we’ve always lived with few limitations. We can continue to live in our home, drive our car, visit our friends and cook our meals.
WHEN I WAS A CHILD growing up in Ohio in the 1950s, my two best friends were Tommy and Terry. They were brothers who taught me a lot about life. When I was nine years old, they showed me how to smoke a cigarette. They also taught me what the middle finger was all about. Okay, some of this stuff wasn’t what you’d want your child to know. But they also helped me learn an important lesson about money.
PREPARING FOR retirement is like running a marathon. It requires dedication, discipline and endurance.
But there’s also a crucial difference.
When you cross the finish line in a marathon, you know the race is over. But when you quit the workforce, it’s much harder to figure out whether you’ve successfully reached retirement. Why? A happy and prosperous retirement is about money, but it’s also about so much more than money. Here are 15 signs that a wonderful retirement likely lies ahead:
You don’t need an online calculator to tell you that you have enough money,
I STILL KEEP IN TOUCH with three high school buddies. One of them, Brent, isn’t doing well. He has high blood pressure, poor eyesight caused by glaucoma and creaky knees that make it hard to get around, and he’s recovering from heart surgery.
My other friend, Robert, is a diabetic with poor vision, suffers from neuropathy pain in the foot, needs a cane to walk and is on medication for various ailments.
Burt, my third pal,
I HAD AN AUNT WHO did everything for her husband. She paid the bills, invested their money and oversaw the family budget, plus she did all the household chores.
They both liked this arrangement. It worked for them. But as they grew older, people were concerned about what would happen to Uncle Bob if he outlived my aunt. He depended on her for everything. How could he take care of himself?
My uncle could not operate a washing machine,
WHEN IT COMES TO retirement planning, many Americans focus primarily on their portfolio’s size. That’s understandable. But there are other issues you should also think about, so you get your retirement on the right track and keep it there. Here are 11 steps to a better retirement:
Housing. As you get older, you become less mobile. Climbing stairs and getting up from a chair become more difficult. Keep this in mind when thinking about what house you’ll live in during retirement.
WHEN I WAS a teenager, I couldn’t wait to get a summer job. Just the thought of it would give me goose bumps. Why? I could earn my own money and buy the car I desperately wanted: a two-tone 1956 Chevrolet Bel Air with a big steering wheel that looked like it belonged on a bus.
My dream was to gain some independence and drive myself wherever I needed to go. After working a number of summer jobs,
I JUST WENT TO SEE a lawyer about making changes to my trust and will. It’s been some 20 years since I had my revocable living trust drawn up, and a lot of things in my life have changed since then.
For most folks, it’s difficult to decide how they want their estate distributed upon their death. Consider five questions:
Should the division of your assets be based solely on relationships, leaving your assets to immediate family,
I’VE READ A LOT of articles about why Americans aren’t saving enough for retirement. Most of the articles lay the blame on our spending habits and the debts we’re servicing.
For instance, some point the finger at the gourmet coffee we buy each morning. Suze Orman says, “You need to think about it as: You are peeing $1 million down the drain as you are drinking that coffee.”
Similarly, others point out we’re spending too much on unnecessary items like vacations,
I VISUALIZED a retirement far different from the one I’ve experienced. Before I quit the workforce, I thought my retirement would be a carefree life where I could do what I want, when I want. I could work, travel, sleep all day. There would be few limits. Why? I had no money issues and few responsibilities.
Today, that seems like a dream. Since retiring, I realize my retirement is constantly changing. Unexpected events and expenses can derail the best-laid plans.
MY MOTHER IS 95 years old and in fairly good shape for her age. Yes, she repeats herself quite often. When she does, I tend to let it go in one ear and out the other.
When she talks about my father, however, I listen very closely. One day, as I was backing the car out of the garage, she looked at all the cabinets my father built and said for the umpteenth time,
I’VE BEEN READING about how people aren’t saving enough money, and how almost half of all Americans carry a balance on their credit cards. Looking to be more financially prudent? Here are 10 pointers on how to build wealth and gain financial security over your lifetime:
1. Save—for a reason. Saving money is the key to building a substantial portfolio. One secret to being a good saver: Have something worthwhile to save for. It might be homeownership or early financial independence.
SOME YEARS AGO, I had a health scare—and it taught me an important lesson about my relationship with money. My primary care physician wanted me to see a hematologist. “Your white blood cells have been trending lower for the last five years,” he opined. “We need to find out what’s causing it.”
After a number of tests, the hematologist thought I might have a rare blood disease. He said the test results were inconclusive,
I WENT FOR MY YEARLY physical. During the exam, my doctor asked me if I was in a relationship.
“Yes, I’m with someone.”
“Is there anything she would want me to know about you?” he asked.
“Uh, are you asking how things are in bed?”
“No, no, no,” he answered. “I meant, has she noticed any changes in your health that I should be aware of? For instance, any skin lesions, forgetfulness or problems with your hearing that she might have brought to your attention.”
I have often heard that people who are happily married live longer than those who are single or divorced.
WHEN I WAS 10 YEARS old, my dad got a job offer in California. It was the early 1960s, we were living in Ohio and the local economy wasn’t doing very well. At the time, California was so desperate for factory workers that employers would run help wanted ads in local newspapers across the country.
My dad, who was a machinist, answered one of the ads by simply placing a phone call to the employer.
I WORKED FOR MORE than 30 years in manufacturing, poring over data and paying attention to every detail that would impact production. As a project manager, I was responsible for making sure hardware was delivered on time, with no cost overruns or quality issues.
If we weren’t meeting deadlines or spending too much money, I was required to report these problems to upper management. They would ask me three questions: “What are you going to do about it?
I WAS LISTENING recently to the Beatles’ song, “She’s Leaving Home,” and I wondered what I would tell a young person starting life on his or her own. If I had a few minutes before he or she walked out the door, here’s what I would try to say:
Relationships. Your personal relationships will matter most in your life. Choose your significant other and friends carefully. They will be your moral compass,
I’M LOOKING AT MY credit card statement and I have a month-end balance of $3,475. My other credit card has almost $1,200 owed on it. My property taxes, automobile insurance and home insurance are due. I have an appointment in a few days to see my lawyer about my trust. He charges $450 an hour. Rachel and I are going on two weekend getaways in the next two weeks.
But I’m not rattled about all these expenses.
WE SPEND TOO MUCH time thinking about what’ll make us happy. We’re always looking for the next high. This morning, we plan our Starbucks coffee in hopes it’ll somehow makes us feel happy. If that doesn’t work, we look for something else, perhaps lunch at a nice restaurant or a weekend getaway to a favorite location.
Don’t get me wrong: There’s nothing wrong with trying to find happiness with these types of experiences. But I think we’re missing the other half of the happiness equation: We should also focus on what makes us unhappy.
I’VE LATELY BEEN talking to Rachel about getting a dog. Not now, but sometime in the future. When Rachel retires, we’d like to do a lot of traveling and taking care of a dog would be difficult. But when we slow down, I believe having a dog would improve our lives in our declining years.
How so? A few years ago, my neighbor, who is retired, told me she lost her husband. She said his passing was extremely painful.
I SUBSCRIBE TO a number of financial magazines, as well as a daily newspaper. Lately, they’ve been piling up in my garage unread. I scan the front cover of the magazines and the headlines of the newspaper, but I’m not that interested. I don’t care about “Where to Invest Your Money in 2019” or “The Best Stocks for the Long Run.”
I guess it’s because I’m no longer in charge of my investment portfolio.
I’VE BEEN RETIRED for a decade. During that time, I have often wondered what it would be like to live somewhere else. Europe, with its rich history, seems like an exciting option. If not Europe, why not move to another part of the country, like Old Town Alexandria in Virginia? Rachel has a son and sister living in the area. We’d be close to Washington, D.C., and other interesting new places.
As I ponder that question,
MY MOTHER IS 95 years old and still has her driver’s license. She drives her car on rare occasions. You might ask, “Why are you letting your mother drive at this age?” Answer: She passed her written driving test at age 93 and is actually a safe driver. She also doesn’t text or talk on her cell phone while driving, unlike so many other people.
My mother is an independent woman—and enigmatic, too. She’s self-assured about driving and yet fearful of seasoning the family dinner,
THERE ARE TWO NEW Year’s resolutions I’d like to accomplish: I would like to gain weight and spend more money.
I’ve been trying to gain weight for such a long time that I’ve just about given up. I eat all day long until my stomach is about to explode. The next morning, I jump on the scale and my weight is back where I started the previous morning. Rachel looks at me amazed, as if I’m some kind of human garbage disposal.
“I DON’T GET IT.” THAT’S what my friend said when I told him I would consider marrying my significant other.
“Why do you feel you need to get married?” he continued. “You’re both in your 60s. You’re not going to have any children. There’s no reason you should get married. If you did, you would make the relationship more complicated. You both probably would want a prenuptial agreement protecting your assets. That, in itself,
I’VE LATELY HAD THIS desire to spend money—not on big-ticket items like a car, boat or expensive watch, but on just about everything else.
When I go to the grocery store, I don’t look at prices anymore. If I want something, I just buy it. When eating out, I don’t look at the prices on the menu. I just order. I have a cable, internet and landline package that costs me $136 a month,
FOR CHRISTMAS, I bought Rachel a saucepan and a universal travel charger for her smartphone. The previous year, I bought her a pair of gloves and socks. She likes gifts that are practical and good value. During December, we prefer to spend our Christmas money on weekend trips. We live in Los Angeles county and this year we went to La Jolla and Las Vegas.
We like to collect pictures of our adventures. We not only store them on the cloud,
ONE OF MY FAVORITE musicians is singer and songwriter Neil Young, who has sold millions of records since the 1960s. Young was rated No. 17 by Rolling Stone on its list of 100 greatest guitarists. He was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame twice: once as a solo artist in 1995 and as a member of Buffalo Springfield in 1997.
When I was in college in the early 1970s, I would often hear students strumming their guitars to his songs as I walked across campus.
WHEN I WAS AGE SIX or seven, an older man came to our house. My mother answered the door. I couldn’t hear what the man was saying, but my mother mentioned the word “garage.” I then followed her to the kitchen and watched her make a sandwich with white bread, sliced bananas and mayonnaise. She then poured a glass of milk and went to the garage.
There, sitting in a lawn chair in our tiny garage,
WHAT’S THE MOST important financial decision you’ll make in your life? Is it when to take Social Security? Choosing the right asset allocation for your investment portfolio? How about the decision to rent or buy a place to live?
I believe that, for many people, it’s who they choose to be their significant other. Together, you’ll decide how you spend your money and how much to set aside for retirement. There will be endless decisions dealing with money—and some will have a huge impact on your financial wellbeing.
MY FIRST JOB WAS in 1963, at age 12, delivering newspapers for the Los Angeles Herald Examiner. There must have been at least five children from my neighborhood who were newspaper carriers. Today, you rarely see anyone delivering newspapers. The Herald Examiner went out of business in 1989.
My next job, as a teenager, was working at a machine shop that made tools for aerospace companies, such as McDonnell Douglas and Rockwell North American.
MY NEXT DOOR neighbor had her home burglarized. The thieves stole some expensive electronic equipment and jewelry. In the aftermath, I thought I should make a list of my valuable possessions and take a photo of each one, in case I ever have to file an insurance claim.
Here’s my list of valuables:
1. Fender Telecaster guitar.
Yes, that’s my complete list. I really don’t own anything of value, other than that guitar, which my parents gave me in 1968 for my 17th birthday.
THERE ARE CERTAIN things in life that remind you you’re getting old: You receive mail from companies offering their cremation services. You realize your house was made for a younger person. You have this urge to throw and give away things as if you won’t be here tomorrow. You feel it’s time to hire a financial advisor.
Actually, I’m not sure hiring a financial advisor is a sign of getting old, but that’s the way it struck me.
I OFTEN WONDER: HOW did I manage to retire early, at age 58? I wasn’t born with a silver spoon in my mouth. I never earned a large salary. I wasn’t a very good investor. I didn’t start saving for retirement until I was in my late 20s.
My future did not look bright. I graduated from college at age 23 with a degree in history. There were not many job openings for a history major.
SHORTLY AFTER I retired, my father was diagnosed with lymphoma cancer. I would spend the next three years helping my mother take care of him. After my father passed away, my mother was emotionally devastated and her health started to decline. It has been nine years since I retired, and most of that time has been spent taking care of my parents.
It’s one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. It takes compassion,
MY DOCTOR TOLD ME that my white blood cell count has been trending lower for the past five years. He was concerned there was something going on with my immune system and wanted me to see an oncologist.
The oncologist performed a number of tests and couldn’t find anything that would have caused my condition. He wasn’t concerned about my ability to fight off infections because my absolute neutrophil count was in an acceptable range.
I WASN’T COMPLETELY honest when I wrote a recent article. HumbleDollar’s editor asked why I reduced my stock position in 2017 from roughly 50% to 25%. He suggested I should mention it in my article. My answer: “At the time I made these changes, I was losing confidence in the sustainability of the bull market and wanted to reduce my risk.” That was true—but it wasn’t the whole truth.
There’s another reason I initially left out the explanation for reducing my stock exposure: I’m simply not comfortable discussing my finances in great detail.
I FEEL LIKE THERE is a death cloud hovering over me. I have been retired for nine years. I have lost my father and two of my best friends to cancer. I have seen aunts, uncles and cousins pass away. I have watched my mother struggle every day to do simple activities. When I talk to my friends, it usually ends in a discussion about our aches and pains or latest doctor’s appointments.
I’m not looking for sympathy or pity.
I WAS LISTENING recently to a Bob Dylan song, From a Buick 6. One of the song’s lines is, “I need a dump truck, baby, to unload my head.” That’s how I sometimes feel about the churning in my own mind concerning retirement.
I turned 67 this year. This is probably one of the most critical periods for me as a retiree. There are things in my life I need to sort out,
WHEN I DECIDED TO retire, I kept asking myself, “Do I have enough money?” If I’m lucky enough to live a long life, my savings might have to last 35 years.
My coworkers, however, had a different question. “Hey Dennis, what are you going to do with all your free time?” I was asked that question so many times it became annoying. I soon realized they had doubts about how they would stay busy during retirement.
SOME PEOPLE SAY I eat like a dog. I eat the same food everyday. For breakfast, I have egg whites with mushrooms on a whole wheat tortilla, and oatmeal with fruit and almonds. For lunch, I have a salad of tomatoes, cucumbers, carrots, avocado and baby spring mixed lettuce, and usually a nonfat bean and rice burrito. For dinner, I have vegetables like broccoli, cauliflower, spinach and squash with fish or poultry. When I feel adventurous,
I HAVE MADE SOME glaring investment mistakes over the years. For instance, in my 20s, I was too conservative. I opened an individual retirement account and regularly invested the maximum annual contribution in a mortgage-backed bond fund. I still think about how much further ahead I would have been, if I had invested more of the money in stocks.
In my 30s, I received a $5,000 performance award from my employer. I wanted to invest the money,
Comments
I’m not angry. When we run into each other, there’s no slow-walking folks — it’s only the two of us. There’s no reason for him to be on the wrong side of the sidewalk. I really think the best thing to do is avoid him. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Post: The Wrong-Sided Man by Dennis Friedman
Link to comment from May 10, 2025
Margot, I still sought my mother’s advice on various matters when she was in her 90s. Older folks have a lot to offer.
Post: The Wrong-Sided Man by Dennis Friedman
Link to comment from May 10, 2025
Good advice. That’s what I’m doing.
Post: The Wrong-Sided Man by Dennis Friedman
Link to comment from May 10, 2025
Yes, she sure is.
Post: The Wrong-Sided Man by Dennis Friedman
Link to comment from May 10, 2025
The last time I saw him, when he bumped my shoulder, he was walking extremely fast toward me, as if he was trying to intimidate me into moving over. I don’t think he wants to talk. He was becoming aggressive.
Post: The Wrong-Sided Man by Dennis Friedman
Link to comment from May 8, 2025
Yes, it’s actually a sidewalk.
Post: The Wrong-Sided Man by Dennis Friedman
Link to comment from May 8, 2025
Count me in. I think it’s a great savings initiative.
Post: Do It for the Kids
Link to comment from May 8, 2025
Rick, I’m glad you and your wife were okay. Thanks for the heads-up on excess insurance. We rented a car in Cambridge and drove to the Cotswolds and a number of other places. The car rental company didn’t have a car for us, so they gave us the company car. It was a stripped-down, small, red car with the National logo on both doors. My wife was a little disappointed, but I wasn’t. I thought the smaller the car, the better for navigating those narrow, winding roads. They have a lot of speed cameras and roundabouts, which take a while to get used to. I was surprised we didn’t get hit with a surcharge for speeding when we turned the car in. There’s one thing I’d buy if we ever rented a car in England again: smelling salts for my wife, because she almost fainted a couple of times sitting in the passenger seat, watching me drive. Even today, when I think of our trip to the U.K., the first thing that comes to mind is that little red car we drove—not Big Ben or the other wonderful sights. Driving over there can leave a lasting impression on you.
Post: A Tale of Excess
Link to comment from May 7, 2025
Marjorie, Thanks for the kind words.
Post: Market Turmoil by Dennis Friedman
Link to comment from April 12, 2025
You misunderstood my comment. When I wrote the word "place," I didn't mean a vacation destination. We have no plans to cancel our vacations, and no plans right now to reduce our spending. I'll edited my comment to try to make it clearer.
Post: Market Turmoil by Dennis Friedman
Link to comment from April 12, 2025