FREE NEWSLETTER
Go to main Forum page »
Two practical questions for the group—because both have a huge impact on your family’s future:
1) Investing books:
If you had to recommend one or two investing books that truly changed how you invest (not hype, not theory-heavy), what are they—and what’s the key takeaway you still use? Something you would gift to your kids/grandkids.
2) End-of-Life planner / “If I get hit by a bus” file:
Do you have an end-of-life planner / estate organizer / family binder that your spouse or kids could use immediately if needed?
I recently saw a spiral-bound end-of-life planner on Amazon (the type marketed as an estate planning organizer with tabs and large print—sometimes even labeled “I’m Dead Now What”).
I’m not looking for legal advice—just what’s worked (or what you’d do differently).
We have updated wills but will be creating a Trust and Sub-Trust when I retire to ensure the protection and best interest for our disabled adult daughter.
Per Chuck Jaffe, I have a “heart attack” letter that explains where our accounts are, and key people (lawyer, accountant, work HR) to call. I’ve printed it for my wife and emailed it to my business-oriented daughter. I update every year or so. It’s a nice feeling of relief to do it.
Peter Lynch’s book, “One up on Wall Street” if you want to do your own stock picking on the side.
Another, “The Book of Investing Wisdom”, for an overview of a wide range of different types of investing. The chapters were written by the best investor of each type themselves, going all the way back to the 1800’s.
I do have a “First Steps” document for my wife, who I am fairly certain will outlive me. Its with my passwords, she knows where to find it.
As far as books go, by far my favorite book on investing is “A Random Walk Down Wall Street.” I wish I had found that one when I was 20. All of my four kids got a copy when they graduated from college. I hope to see a grandchild old enough so I can give them a copy as well. Now on its 13th edition.
I wonder how or why I missed this forum post when it was first published. I have a folder labeled “When I Croak”. It contains important information for my wife and kids related to investment & IRA accounts, locations of other documents, people to call, and a reference/location of existing Financial POA, Medical POA, will/trust, and Advanced Care Directives.
Another great book Simple Wealth by Nick Murray
The 4 pillars by Bernstein and bogle’s books
I don’t have much time to sit & read, but I do read a lot of blogs & the one that is most helpful for me to put together an end of life “binder” or letter this year is from a blog writer named Fritz Gilbert. His site is called The Retirement Manifesto. He wrote a post titled Why I Write A “Love Letter” Every Year (and you should, too).
https://www.theretirementmanifesto.com/why-i-write-a-love-letter-every-year-and-you-should-too/It helped me complete my task, and it is very instructive for any one who has never done one.
The Intelligent Asset Allocator by William Bernstein is a must read. The best quote is “If you have won the game, stop playing”.
This topic is at the forefront of my mind right now.
One of my slightly younger sisters recently lost her 63-year-old husband to a sudden heart attack in December. She had happily given him full charge of their financial situation, but he kept putting off writing things down for her. Not only was there nothing like a Next of Kin (NOK) box with password lists for various accounts, but he had just gotten a new laptop she could not get into—no passwords anywhere to be found. Luckily for her, she was able to get into his iPhone, and that helped a little. This sister has had no access to money in this first month since his death except her own meager savings account, but luckily she had a credit card to put some bill payments on.
It’s like their 60s snuck up on them. They had done no estate planning or will either. The delays of probate are in her future.
My husband and I both know where all our papers and passwords are, but what happened with my sister has been a real wake-up call. I made an appointment with an estate lawyer to review our 10-year-old estate plan and get some recommendations for going forward now that we’re retirement age. Frankly, though, I’m more concerned about someone else having to piece things if we both died one after another for some reason (we don’t have kids). I will either order a NOK box or create something like it myself very soon.
As for your question about “what worked for you,” I know from my mother’s sudden death at age 66 back in 2001 the best gift she gave her kids was a folder in the red desk in her house that contained written instructions on who first to call (the cremation place she had prepaid for) and then who next to call (she had a whole list, starting with her doctor) if she suddenly died, and also how exactly how she wished her funeral to go (down to the songs someone would sing). She had her house and money papers in the folder, too. She never spoke to us directly about any last wishes, but when she died suddenly, we all remembered her telling each of us four kids about the “folder in the red desk.” In our 30s and 40s, we would have had NO idea what to do otherwise.
My father, many years divorced from my mother, did NOT leave us a helpful folder when he died 15 years after her, but that’s another story.
My mother sort of did the same thing. She even had a sermon outline for our pastor. We had very little to do after she died, except clean out and sell her house, which took a long time even though she wasn’t a hoarder.
I created my own end of life planner. I handled all the business affairs in our household and my wife would have been lost without it. I do not feel our business affairs were all that complicated, but there is an incredible amount of detail that is still needed, and I would not be there to tell her about any of it.
My gift to my children was not an investment book but advice on how to find a financial advisor because I had retired from that informal role when we all got a windfall inheritance. And I followed suit and hired my own financial advisor.
And I send them an updated 1 to 2 page document every year with all my financial accounts, location of vital documents, account login info (email, tech stuff, etc), SSN, pension info and so on. No notebook but this should help them accomplish the necessary tasks. And they know my end of life preferences – we talk about this stuff at least yearly.
Random Walk by Malkiel is the winner that taught me and millions that indexing is the winning strategy and I read it around 1976. history has proven it 100% true and will remain so.
don’t go off the rails with active or alternative investing
There was an excellent post on this sight a few months back called “The Letter” that addresses end-of-life/estate planning issues. I believe it was in the fall. Very detailed.
As far as books go, you can’t go wrong with anything by John Bogle or Jonathan. I also like the Psychology of Money by Morgan Housel.
I made my own end-of-life document. It is three single-spaced pages with annually-reviewed sections on: general info (former and current address, date of birth, ssn); employer info and supervisor contact (I am retired with a part-time job); health/insurance policies; financial accounts; donor advised fund account and successor trustee; credit accounts; memberships; hardware ids and passwords; software accounts; location of important documents; safe deposit box contents; and notifiy upon death (friends and family). Most sections contain contact information, for individuals and/or customer service.
As for books on investing, I confess to reading only one, and that was decades after beginning my investing journey: The Prudent Professor, planning and saving for a worry-free retirement from academe, by Bridges and Bridges. I took away from it that keeping retirement funds in fixed income at TIAA is a reasonable proposition and that TIAA annuities are well structured and can be tailored to fit one’s needs.
I gave each of my children The Bogleheads’ Guide to Investing in 2020. I had not read it but know the Bogleheads’ investment philosophy matches mine. I’m not sure they read it, but was a little push to think about their future.
We used to have a binder labeled “Emergency” with the basics updated before each trip for our nephew/executor to easily find. (We have no children.)
Last year, I bought an all-in-one-place organizing system called the NOK (Next of Kin) Box when it was on sale. I’ve gradually had to take over our financial tasks as my husband has become unable to manage. This has slowly revealed the minutiae he took care of, and can no longer easily remember.
Some info/paperwork has been simple to add such as our wills, powers of attorney, CCRC contract, etc. Other additions are less obvious such as insurance renewals, auto-payments, medical info, keys, etc. I continue to work on filling these folders, backed up by digital records on an external hard drive.
I know from serving as a personal representative (executor) that a person taking over needs to be able to answer many, many questions quickly without hours of tedious searching.
The NOK Box people provide an actual box filled with dividers and folders, or people can use their own boxes or filing cabinets.
You’re so right about being able to answer questions quickly and correctly. For me, the most frustrating challenge was the password for our local electric company (a very small one) so I could put the account in my name. To my knowledge, my husband never had a pet, so how could I guess the pet’s name (the clue)? The rep eventually took pity and told me the password. I guess the high security is to protect against vengeful former partners or something.
I review our finances with my wife several times a year and we have a longer meeting every New Years day (Just had one) to go indepth and talk our accounts, our spending, vacation dreams and about the future. In the same location of these binders of financial reports is an evelope that is labeled. “It I get hit by a bus”
It does not get into great detail, but clearly explains the investments, the accounts and recommendations on going forward without me. She already has access to safe that contains our wills, end of life directives, all my passwords, etc.
My suggested reading is Bernstein’s “If You Can”. Short, an easy read with logical assignments about saving, investing, eliminating debt, and supplemental readings to complete.
As for the “end of life” information, I have a simple Excel document titled “Dave’s time is up: Things (wife), (daughter), and (son) should know” that tells where banking, insurance, investment, will, etc. documents are located and provides complete contact information for each of the various accounts. My wife and children all know where it is located and it includes the master password for my password keeper so all will be able to access the accounts.
I am currently working on an “end of life” document, or rather several documents that will be in a binder, along with directions about how to get necessary passwords. Jeff, I’m interested in how you are creating a trust and sub-trust for your daughter. We have an adult daughter with mental illness whom we are supporting. We have a trust, and her portion of inheritance will be put into a special trust managed by a trust company. It’s not a true special needs trust, and she is not disabled. Wondering if you have advice?
Clare – Send me an email at racelens@gmail.com and we can discuss my plans for the trust.
Clare, I created a template for myself and shared it with my family via Google Docs with all the vital information that I think they would need for when I die or become permanently disabled. I based it on one that was shared on an episode of the “Catching Up to FI” podcast. I think it was created by Kristin Huddleston.(hers wasn’t real user friendly imo.) My resources are modest but adequate yet my completed template is actually 22 pages long! I included magazine subscriptions that automatically renew and memberships and automatic donations that are paid electronically as well as a link to my extensive password file. It took months for me to complete! I also created one for our daughter who has special needs. Hers is 28 pages long! Have you checked with a special needs trust attorney re your daughter’s situation? She may actually qualify for a special needs trust. We are in PA and I’ve learned a ton of information from our attorney who is also an advocate for special needs.
For best books suggestions, see Jeffrey K. Actor’s 2023 post “The Write Stuff” and comments, which also include a reference to the responses to the question “What’s the best financial book you’ve ever read?” by Jonathan Clements.
There’s also John Yeigh’s post “Guiding our Youth.”
I thought A Random Walk Down Wall Street and The Millionaire Next Door addressed both sides of the investing equation in an easily digested manner. I’m ashamed to admit I haven’t gotten around to Jonathan’s book yet, but it’s in the queue!
Came here to mention A Random Walk Down Wall Street by Burton Malkiel. I can’t recommend it highly enough.
I’m still in my 40s, so my “I’m dead” binder will probably wait, but I still think about it. It’s a good idea.
I couldn’t think of a particular book, but now that you mention the Millionaire Next Door, I’m still quoting that book some 30 years after reading it. So it must have had some influence on me.
Not necessarily an investing book and it didn’t really change how I invest, but I highly recommend How to Think About Money by Jonathan Clements.
Our end of life instructions are very simple and fit in a short Word document.
I can’t name a specific book, rather just a lifetime of miscellaneous reading, and of course, my internet friends from HumbleDollar.
I have accomplished all of the end of life chores you listed. I saw the binder you mention on Amazon, but opted for a simple pocketed document holder from the office store that fits in my fire safe. I have loaded all of those documents on flash drives and given them to the kids.
That’s a great plan Dan.
Jeff, I saw one binder titled “F*%# I’m Dead”. I thought that was pretty funny.
My girls and their families would get a kick out of that and the thought of making them smile at a sad and difficult juncture for them is appealing to me. I’ll check it out as we are in the process of updating end of life documents currently. Thanks!
I bought both my girls “F It” 2026 desk calendars and they really appreciate the work directed humor. Of course, they both work remotely so no one else will see it and possibly be offended.
jan, I had a bull sh*! alarm button in my tax office that I would occasionally press when appropriate.
Love it! I could have used that back in my working days and maybe should have one nearby for some recent conversations! 🙂
Oh, me too. Faculty meetings were legendary for ridiculous discussions (I always threatened to take notes and publish something in a sociolinguistics journal), and don’t get me started on the BS being slung around by top administrators.
😂