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Death by Retirement

Mike Drak

I LED A RETIREMENT seminar some years ago at a large manufacturing company. During the question-and-answer session that followed my presentation, a 60-something welder told the group he’d never retire. I asked why. His response: All his friends who’d retired before him were already dead, and he didn’t want to follow in their footsteps.

What he said resonated with me—because I knew someone who suffered a similar fate. Gino was a client back in my banking days. I really liked him because he was both street smart and salt of the earth.

It was difficult to find work in the small Italian village where Gino was born, so he emigrated to Canada in his late teens. He lived with some relatives initially and eventually found work at a small manufacturing company. He worked hard for the owner, who took a liking to him because of his work ethic and caring attitude.

One day, the owner asked Gino if he’d like to buy the company from him, and Gino—happily surprised—said yes. The owner looked upon Gino as family and wanted to help him, so he struck a favorable deal.

Gino never forgot the kindness shown to him by the former owner, and he used the business to help others, just like he had been helped. People back home in Italy knew that, if they wanted to move to Canada in search of a better life, they could always find work at Gino’s.

Everyone worked hard. They were one big, happy family and, as luck would have it, Gino found his future wife working on the production line. Funny how love works.

Gino didn’t flaunt his company’s success. He didn’t live in a big house or drive a fancy car. He reinvested most of the profits back into the company.

Because he and his wife couldn’t have kids, Gino spent most of his time working at the company. He would be the first to arrive and the last to leave. You could find him there most weekends.

All the employees loved and respected Gino. Every year, there was the annual summer barbecue and bocce ball tournament, as well as a Christmas party with gifts for all of the employees’ kids.

Gino had a standing arrangement with the bank to open accounts for all new employees, and he’d encourage them to start saving. If employees wanted to buy a home and needed help getting a mortgage from the bank, they knew Gino would be there for them.

Gino never thought about retirement. It was the furthest thing from his mind. But one day, things changed. Gino had lunch with the CEO of a large, overseas competitor. The CEO told him out of the blue that he wanted to purchase his company.

When the CEO asked him to name his price, Gino gave a number that was way more than he thought his company was worth, thinking that it would never be accepted. The CEO told him he’d get back to him. Gino laughed it off, thinking it would never happen. But things changed when the CEO called a few weeks later and said he wanted to do the deal.

Gino felt stuck. He really didn’t want to sell the company, but felt obligated because he was old school and, for him, a deal was a deal. Suddenly, Gino was a rich man and, for the first time in his life, had a lot of free time on his hands.

That first year, he and his wife visited Italy for the summer. Then they bought a vacation home in Florida, where they planned to spend their winters.

People who knew him well began to notice a change in Gino. He was no longer the happy, high-energy person he used to be. It seemed like the fire inside had gone out and, despite all the money, he seemed sad.

Because Gino used to work all the time, he’d never developed any outside hobbies. His work was his hobby. He tried joining a prestigious golf club, but didn’t enjoy playing the game and never went much.

Gino missed his company. It was his passion and purpose in life. He missed his employees. They were like an extended family to him. Despite all the money, Gino didn’t have anything meaningful or fulfilling to do. It ended up costing him. A few short years later, he died.

Mike Drak is a 38-year veteran of the financial services industry. He’s the co-author of Longevity Lifestyle by Design, Retirement Heaven or Hell and Victory Lap Retirement. Mike works with his wife, an investment advisor, to help clients design a fulfilling retirement. For more on Mike, head to BoomingEncore.com. Check out his earlier articles.

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Klaatu
11 months ago

Being interested in everything and having a lot of irons in the fire gets me out of bed. I was also careful never to let my job define me. Sad about Gino, by the way.

kt2062
11 months ago

Nursing homes and hospitals are full of elderly people who have children but who never gets visitors. Having children is no guarantee of a life full of happiness and love, despite the Hallmark movies. Having a drug-addicted or schizophrenic child can take years off your life. Another thing to consider is that many people like Gino often ignore their health, not eating right, exercising or relaxing. They’re a walking heart attack.

Mike Drak
11 months ago
Reply to  kt2062

You are right about people in nursing homes not having their kids visit them. I saw this when my mother was in a home and it was the saddest thing.

Boomerst3
11 months ago
Reply to  kt2062

Pretty gloomy. I have 4 kids and we have happiness and love.

David Leary
11 months ago

I “retired” in 2007. After a mid-career layoff I spent 20 years at a large aerospace company. There was a lot of stress primarily based on the company needing to keep contracts coming in which meant that continued employment was always uncertain.

The way I handled this was to start a money-making sideline, in my case, rental real estate. As this sideline increased my stress level decreased. I had ways to keep at least some income flowing even without a job. I kept the 401(k) contributions up but also put money into the real estate.

While a lot of people said I “retired early” from my job, I had a different attitude — I declared myself independently wealthy. Sure I had a pension and SS, but I also had a small business. Through 1031 exchanges I moved the real estate to a new, lower cost location and have been there for 17 years. Managing the real estate takes 10-20 hours per week, which is just about perfect for having both a sense of purpose and spare time for volunteer work.

Not only does this avoid the lonely and adrift sensations, it also does a lot to keep our income up with inflation.

Mike Drak
11 months ago
Reply to  David Leary

Thanks David I love reading stories about successful late bloomers. People that use their FI as a stepping stone to something better.

Robert Wheeler
11 months ago

Excellent and thought-provoking article. My profession (airline pilot) had a mandatory retirement age of 60 for decades before it was raised to 65.
Stories are many about early deaths after retirement – and a few suicides.
But to play devil’s advocate a wee bit, all these stories are anecdotal and may not get to the real issues. To offer something only slightly less anecdotal, my pilot’s union publishes names of deceased pilots in a list called “Gone West.” Ages of death are, as we should expect, all over the range of possibilities. Longevity has so many factors…
A bigger one than simple continuation of work might be the quantity and quality of shared love or its absence in one’s life. See, e.g., the whole “Happiness is Love, Full Stop” thing from the Harvard study. In Gino’s case, consider that he had no children, thus no grandchildren either. After leaving his company many/most of the people he cared about surely drifted away. Maybe his marriage was great, but as he lived for his work, maybe his marriage had become a lonely one for both parties. Who knows?
Again, longevity has many factors – work might be an important one, or it could be a trap for one’s remaining time. Maybe the real lesson of the story is that quality of life is more important than quantity, and that more quality (love) might contribute to quantity (years)? Apologies for the length of my musing.

Mike Drak
11 months ago
Reply to  Robert Wheeler

Robert thank you for your musing! There are a lot of possibilities here that need to be considered in terms of how this could have been averted.

Andrew Forsythe
11 months ago

Thanks for the story, Mike. I remember a period many years ago when my parents’ friends were reaching retirement age and the different experiences they had. I noticed that some of them, who were obligated to retire at 65 per company policy, were adrift once they quit working. I suspect that many of those had never really developed interests outside of work.

My dad was fortunate in that he loved his work and faced no mandatory retirement age. He kept going to the office (although in later years he probably wasn’t doing a lot of actual work) almost till the day he died at 98.

As for me, I enjoyed my work for the most part but was also looking forward to a new chapter. I happily retired at 65 and have never looked back.

Different strokes….

Mike Drak
11 months ago

I agree Andrew – different strokes.

parkslope
11 months ago

Your article is consistent with large scale studies showing that depression, even mild to moderate, is associated with significantly higher death rates.

“In this nationally representative cohort study, we found that 7.2% of US adults had moderate to severe depressive symptoms, and 14.9% had mild depressive symptoms. Compared to those without depressive symptoms, participants with mild depressive symptoms had a 35% and 49% higher risk of all-cause and CVD mortality, respectively. Risk of all-cause, CVD, and IHD mortality was 62%, 79%, and 121% higher, respectively, for those with moderate to severe depressive symptoms compared to those without depressive symptoms. Associations were largely consistent across subgroups and in all sensitivity analyses.”

https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamanetworkopen/fullarticle/2810363#:~:text=Risk%20of%20all%2Dcause%2C%20CVD,and%20in%20all%20sensitivity%20analyses.

Mike Gaynes
11 months ago

What a sad story, Mike. It seems to me that Gino’s joy in life was supporting and giving to his employees. How tragic that a man with so much to give never sought others to whom he could give. His wisdom and experience would have meant so much had he become a mentor, a teacher, a supporter of charitable work in the community. But he chose not to do that, not to find an outlet for his generous instincts. If selling his company was his first mistake, not seeking a new, meaningful outlet was his second.

Mike Drak
11 months ago
Reply to  Mike Gaynes

I agree but when you are suffering from retirement shock it is hard to think clearly. Also people usually men do not like to tell others that they are suffering. They don’t want to appear weak or vulnerable and it ends up costing them large.

mytimetotravel
11 months ago

Back in the 1990s, as I turned 50, I started noticing that older colleagues, almost all men, tended to retire at 65 and soon after either came back to work or became ill and often died. As I didn’t like either option, and I wanted to travel, that observation was a big motivator for my early retirement. But I didn’t have the total absorption in my job and identification with it described in your article, and plenty to occupy me once I left. Twenty three years later I’m still alive and in pretty good shape.

Mike Drak
11 months ago
Reply to  mytimetotravel

When you are your work odds are you are going to struggle when you leave your work behind. It’s important to find new purpose in other things but that is easier said then done. I’m glad it worked out for you.

OldITGuy
11 months ago

Very interesting article Mike; thanks. It seems like Gino did have a very rewarding mission in life so I can see how suddenly giving it up without something equally captivating to take its place could be very difficult to cope with and was probably (in hindsight) very challenging for him to deal with. Interestingly my oldest son commented on this very thing just yesterday. He made the comment that over the years he’s occasionally seen regulars at his pub who retired and then seemed to come around and just hang out at a bit of a loss of purpose. Your article is a good reminder that people are different and have different needs and wants so probably nothing (including retirement) is a good fit for everyone. As with so many things in life, we have to figure out what will work for us.

Mike Drak
11 months ago
Reply to  OldITGuy

Well said! My purpose here is to warn people of what could happen so they can avoid it from happening.

Robert Wright
11 months ago

Fortunately I never had Gino’s problem. I retired 14 years ago and never looked back.

Boomerst3
11 months ago
Reply to  Robert Wright

Same here. Retired 9 years ago and don’t miss work one iota. I enjoyed it while working and it made me and my family wealthy, but I love having control of my life and doing whatever I want, and when I want. Even if doing nothing much.

Ben Rodriguez
11 months ago
Reply to  Robert Wright

I probably have 14 years to go, but I like to think I’ll be in your camp, Mr. Wright.

Mike Drak
11 months ago
Reply to  Robert Wright

Nice to see you are winning the retirement game!

Rick Connor
11 months ago

Mike, thanks for the thought provoking article. When I was a young engineer, there was a graph floating around the industry that purported to show that those employees working later in life died earlier. It was supposed to be based on actual experiences of Boeing employees. Many decades later I read that the data was false, but it had become an article of faith in the aerospace industry. It was assumed that long hours and high stress contributed to declining health and earlier death.

Nuke Ken
11 months ago
Reply to  Rick Connor

Rick, I remember seeing that graph. I thought it seemed very suspect based on the advanced ages of many retirees recorded in obituaries in my company’s internal magazine. But as you say, it was an article of faith for a lot of people back in the day. Early example of “fake news” going viral.

Mike Drak
11 months ago
Reply to  Rick Connor

Rick my personal believe is that good work – work that you love doing and gives you a strong sense of purpose will help you live longer. Bonus longevity points if it involves serving others.

Jeff Bond
11 months ago

I wonder if the story would be the same if Gino and his wife adopted children instead of adopting the company community.

How did the company culture change after Gino sold it? Did it remain a community-based, benevolent employer?

Mike Drak
11 months ago
Reply to  Jeff Bond

Having children might have reduced the risk but not eliminate it. The company changed over time and no longer had the same values.

Jeff Bond
11 months ago
Reply to  Mike Drak

Mike – that was my assumption. Thanks for the confirmation.

R Quinn
11 months ago

I can tell similar stories of retirees who I worked with and were unprepared for the change, but they didn’t die as a result. He may have been unhappy with his leisure life which is understandable, but did it relate to his death.

Last fall I learned of a man from my former company who had worked over 40 years and was retiring last December – he died in November.

Mike Drak
11 months ago
Reply to  R Quinn

Gino was an outlier and I know other outliers that suffered a similar fate. Was his death a result of extreme unhappiness, loss of purpose, lack of identity and meaning? I’m not a doctor but I would bet that selling his company had a lot to do with it.

Marjorie Kondrack
11 months ago

Mike, interesting and sad, but thought provoking article. Gino’s story is unusual in that he has all all the good interpersonal skillls, and key attributes needed for success and fulfillment in every phase of life.

we could delve into all the different possible reasons for his lethargy after retiring from his business—but in the end life is a mystery and human nature so difficult to plumb.

Mike Drak
11 months ago

I agree the meaning of life is hard to pin down but I’m working on it.

Edmund Marsh
11 months ago

Great story, Mike. In your opinion, what’s the key difference between those who thrive by continuing to work and those who love their retirement?

Mike Drak
11 months ago
Reply to  Edmund Marsh

Edmund it all comes down to how you are wired. I’m growth oriented and feel a strong need to work and help others. Comfort oriented people are happy to retire to a life of leisure. Sometimes when I’m working hard I’m jealous of them.

Kevin Madden
11 months ago
Reply to  Mike Drak

Wow. I politely disagree with these characterizations. I am growth oriented and am using retirement to expand my knowledge in new areas (e.g., home improvements), develop stronger relationships (e.g., with old friends), read more, etc. I am far from comfort oriented (e.g., I run daily and seek challenging physical adventures). I’ll assert that that many people keep working because they ARE comfort oriented, afraid to venture out of their comfort zone.

Mike Drak
11 months ago
Reply to  Kevin Madden

I think many comfort oriented keep working because they need the income. If they had enough to retire they would be gone in a heart beat.

Kevin Madden
11 months ago
Reply to  Mike Drak

To Edmund’s question, perhaps the key difference is whether you thrive on the structure and resources that the typical working environment provides or you thrive on the flexibility and variety that retirement provides.

ps., Thanks for writing this thought-provoking article!

David Lancaster
11 months ago
Reply to  Mike Drak

I love the terms “growth” and “comfort” oriented. Here’s a vote for comfort orientation.

Kevin Bradford
11 months ago

Excellent Article – it reinforces what I have seen in both my family and career. I think work can be an incredibly important part of life and I am fortunate to really enjoy working. Having a good balance of leisure activities is important too, but I have noticed many folks who thrive into old age don’t give up on their work. I sure don’t intend to for as long as possible!

Mike Drak
11 months ago
Reply to  Kevin Bradford

Kevin it’s important to know what drives you and in your case it’s work. I feel the same way and my goal is to keep working for as long as I can. It’s not a money thing but rather a fulfillment thing. And yes I agree that you need to come up with a good balance between work leisure and adventure. That is still a work in progress for me.

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