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HERE’S ONE OF THE most important lessons I’ve learned in retirement: Bad health will limit what you can do—or feel like doing—no matter how much money you have. Good health is the biggest determinant of how rich and fulfilling your retirement years will be.
You and you alone are responsible for your health care. It’s not your spouse, your children, your friends or your doctors. It’s you. Nobody should have to beg you to see a doctor.
Also, doctors are not all-seeing mystics. They need your help to catch problems early, when they’re easier to treat. Just like retirement finances, the sooner you work on the problem, the more likely you’ll have success fixing it.
I have two brothers who taught me these lessons. For their entire working lives, they co-owned a furniture store. Both reached their 60s happily married, with mature and well-adjusted adult children, and they were quite wealthy. They should have had a long, wonderful retirement.
But it didn’t happen that way.
One died at age 64 and the other at 68. Both had horrible deaths as a result of cancer, though neither smoked or abused alcohol. Our family didn’t have a history of cancer. Our father lived to 92 and our mother is currently 95. It’s my opinion that both deaths could have been prevented if they’d been proactive about their health care. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t wish I could walk and talk with them. It’s too late.
But maybe not for me. I’ve learned from their tragic errors.
The sad fact is, my brothers just waited too long to act on medical issues, and then handed the doctors unsolvable problems. They had the money. They had the time. But they just chose to ignore the problems, hoping they’d get better on their own. That didn’t happen.
One brother was literally begged to go to the doctor by his family when obvious signs of melanoma skin cancer arose. He just “didn’t have time.” He belatedly got treatment, thought they had it, only for it to pop up later throughout his body.
The other brother had signs of trouble for more than a year. He made a trip to the doctor, who mistook his problem. My brother never followed up with the doctor when he failed to heal. He kept hoping it would just get better on its own. It didn’t.
I served on active duty or in the reserves for the military from age 17 to 60. But you know what? After my first physical exam at 17, the medical tests that the Army and Navy conducted were very basic. You’d be surprised at how many people with ill-health serve in the military today. I once went on a weekend drill in the reserves where a major fell over sideways from a massive heart attack during some light exercise. He died.
I’d always done a lot of exercise. But after retirement—and after seeing what happened with my brothers—I put that same rigor into my health care. My attitude changed.
I get an annual physical, along with eye and dental checkups. I eat healthily and exercise daily. I get my prostate checked each year and get a colonoscopy every five years. I inform the doctors of any oddball things that my body is doing. I wear protective clothing when out in the sun, as well as sunscreen. I get all my appropriate vaccinations, like I did in the military, and that’s prevented me from getting some bad diseases. I didn’t think there was much else I could do.
But I forgot one area: a total body skin exam by a dermatologist. My friends were talking about it and I knew it would be a good idea, considering my brother’s history and the fact that I had noticed a black spot—a little smaller than a dime—on the arch of my foot. It wasn’t getting bigger and wasn’t causing pain. I pointed out the spot to my family doctor and it puzzled her. But she didn’t think it was anything to worry about. She just told me to watch it and go to a dermatologist if I felt the need.
So, I went to a dermatologist for a total body skin exam and pointed out the spot. A biopsy was done. I got a call a week later from the doctor’s office and was told that I had abnormal cells. This wasn’t melanoma, but the doctor was concerned. She said it could rapidly morph into melanoma and wanted to get it out of my body as soon as possible.
I was sent to a podiatrist the next day, who removed the spot. The doctor kept saying over and over again how lucky I was to have caught this problem early. He said it was an unusual place for such a problem and, if it had grown much larger, he didn’t know how he would have handled it. I had to do outpatient surgery to get it all out. Happily, the biopsy came up negative.
My son’s mother-in-law decided to get a total body skin scan because of me. The doctor found and removed two spots of skin cancer from her body. It stunned her.
I feel blessed. I want you to be blessed. Get those checkups for yourself and for your family. It might save a life. It sure can’t hurt.
Ken Begley has worked for the IRS and as an accountant, a college director of student financial aid and a newspaper columnist, and he also spent 42 years on active and reserve service with the U.S. Navy and Army. Now retired, Ken likes to spend his time with his family, especially his grandchildren, and as a volunteer with Kentucky’s Marion County Veterans Honor Guard performing last rites at military funerals, including more than 350 during the past three years. Check out Ken’s earlier articles.
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Excellent column. I’m sorry about your loss, but it’s an important story to share. Skin is our largest organ. It deserves care and our attention. Thanks
Good advice. I recently started annual full body skin checkups. Also, by establishing that, you get in the system of a dermatologist, which gives you access to one should something come up between checkups.
If you have basal cell or squamous cell cancer then you may want to consider Moh’s surgery in which the surgeon removes skin and then examines it under a microscope to make sure the margins are clear of cancer cells. They keep removing thin layers until the margins are clear. It’s your best way to be sure they “got it all” while minimizing the size of the hole they need to make. This can be especially important on the face and neck; my insurance policy covers Moh’s in these areas.
This surgery requires additional training that most dermatologists don’t have. Instead of offering it as an option with a referral (or you can look up qualified Moh’s surgeons online) they simply schedule you with them for the procedure they know how to do. Happened to me but fortunately I knew about Moh’s and saw a specialist instead. The scar on my cheek is no doubt smaller than it would have been otherwise.
For more info https://www.aad.org/public/diseases/skin-cancer/types/common/melanoma/mohs-surgery
I always tell the doctor at my dermatology surgical center that he has probably saved my life. I lived a dissolute youth in the sun – lots of beach, caddying, outdoor construction, golfing, and sunburns on vacation. All that came back to haunt me in my 60s. I’ve made a drawing of my body, front and back (like in that Operation game), to show all the places where I’ve had Mohs surgeries. But I’m now clean and careful about the sun. Readers should pay close attention to their skin as they age.
Important piece-thanks. To add to the comments regarding going to the dermatologist, I have had a few spots removed now. The most serious? A squamous on the top of my head, which was up against a nerve. If I had ignored it or not treated it sooner, the doc said it could have spread to my brain. I have a nice noticeable dent in my head now-I tell folks the doc forgot to replace his divot. Needless to say, Ill keep going to see him despite that.
I am going to be signing up for a Medicare plan G. Why? Because I am cheap. If you are confused knowing that this is the most expensive plan this is the reason. Because I am cheap I know that if I have a plan that has no deductible and copays I will be more likely to address a problem in a more timely manner. I know up front each year what my maximum medical costs will be and can plan accordingly.
Excellent article. I work in acute care so I get to see all the patients that waited too long.
Ken, thanks for a great, important article. So many of us have stories of disease that was caught by routine screens.
Excellent article, Ken. You are 100% right about those skin checks. A dermatologist’s trained eyes can detect things we would never notice. I’ve likewise had mine spot something I wasn’t even aware of, biopsy it and determine it was pre-cancerous, and cut it out.
The comments now have me wondering if my annual skin check should instead be semi-annual!
Melanoma is really sneaky as there is usually no pain early on. About thirteen years ago had a spot on my shoulder that didn’t look right, went to a dermatologist who immediately biopsied this dark spot. Came back as Stage 3 melanoma, had surgery within two weeks after this biopsy and to this day it looks like I lost a fight on my left shoulder from the surgery scarring. Anyway, worked out okay and still to this day go to the dermatologist every six months and occasionally something is removed and a few have been positive, but caught early enough to not cause a problem. If something doesn’t look right on your skin, check it out, don’t wait.
And really sometimes it is a place that you cannot see.. so get checked annually by a professional!
Amen, Ken. Especially about melanoma.
I’m among the first generation of breakthrough survivors of stage 4 metastatic melanoma, which was considered 100% fatal at the time Jimmy Carter and I were both diagnosed in 2015. New immunotherapy drugs came along at the same time and saved us both, along with thousands of others. But even now this medical “miracle” only helps about 60% of advanced melanoma patients.
If you’ve ever spent a lot of time in the sun (and who hasn’t?), especially if you’ve had a bad sunburn at some point, getting a hair-to-toenails skin inspection from a dermatologist a couple of times a year is a must. At my last one the doctor spotted something so tiny on my leg that I hadn’t even noticed it. I saw his eyebrows go up. Yep, it was malignant. It was removed in a 15-minute procedure. Scared the crap out of me.
Don’t wait.
Great article Ken. I had a close call with melanoma 25 years ago, and I have been attentive and diligent about my health ever since. I do checkups with dermatologist, urologist, PCP, orthopedics, and allergist. I also monitor my health, and if something abnormal seems to be going on, I will contact the appropriate doc.
I am thankful to still be going pretty well at 79, and that I have good health care.
I’m so healthy that I only ever catch a cold once every several years, so I kind of believed that I was going to live forever. I also just had my prostate removed. I never suffered a single symptom of prostate cancer, yet there it was. Being proactive about my health no doubt has saved my life. After not seeing any doctor (other than a dentist) for the first 20 years of my adult life, I now have doctors for routine checkups, skin, sleep, urology, dental, hearing, and surgery. Thirty or so years ago my friends and I would sit at the bar and talk about beer and football, these days we talk about statins and c-pap machines. How things change.
I’d like to share this article with the world.
great article and it needs to be read by anyone who’s in the late 50’s or early 60’s. my wife said this contrarian statement, “stupidity is a right and no one can take that right from anyone”.
“stupidity is a right and no one can take that right from anyone”.—I’ll be using that quote. Tell her “thanks!”
Ken, good advice we should all heed to, especially as we age and the immune system is not as strong.
while melanoma is the most deadliest form of skin cancer, don’t discount squamous skin cancer— perhaps not as deadly, but can be disfiguring.
I have had both skin cancers and can tell you the squamous was one of the most traumatic events of my lifetime. I had a very nasty tumor on my face which left me with a hole in my face the size of a half dollar. requiring facial reconstruction of the left side of my face..
it was a long recovery, but thanks to the skill of the surgeons at the University of Pennsylvania. I am satisfied with the results given the extent of the surgery. I can see the difference, but I don’t think it’s perceptible to others.
earlier this year, I also had melanoma surgery on my upper right—arm a little trickier
Location for Melanoma but again I received specialized care with good results.
I agree with a lot of this. It is wrong, and counter-productive, that Medicare only pays for an annual “wellness check” instead of a proper physical. However, now I’m mid-seventies I am starting to reconsider some tests. I may only have one more mammogram, for instance. There is the possibility of a false positive, and the question of what I would do about an actual positive. I already do Cologuard instead of colonoscopy, and I may only do one more of those. I will continue full-body checks with my dermatologist, though.
Yes, that wellness check makes no sense to me!
Good article and I couldn’t agree more. Only thing I’d like to share is some advice my Mom gave me once. She said don’t anchor to just one doctor, no much how you like them. If one doctor can’t help you with a specific concern, see another. Doctors are like everyone else. No matter how good they might generally be, on any given day they might miss something or just not have experience with whatever’s bothering you. It’s your life so don’t hesitate to get a second opinion if something doesn’t sound right.
Agreed. If it’s something serious, or you have the slightest doubt, get a second opinion. Maybe a third. I once had a doctor who wanted to remove both ovaries and my uterus along with a tumor. Instead I did some research and found a doctor who removed one ovary along with the (happily benign) tumor.
Great information, Ken, and very important.
Thank you for caring enough to write this reminder!
Thanks. Great article.