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FOR MY BIRTHDAY this year, my wife gave me a card that declares, “Not Dead Yet.” That might sound morbid, but I laughed. The reason: My wife had misinterpreted something I used to say to colleagues at my final job.
When they saw me at the coffee machine, they’d often ask, “How are you doing, Dave?”
Instead of saying “fine,” I used to say, “I’m still breathing. Count your blessings. Blessing No. 1: I’m still breathing.”
In many cases, I’d get an amen, or colleagues would chuckle, or they’d say something positive. My wife saw it differently.
She always thought it meant I was done with living and getting ready to die, which is the furthest thing from the truth. In fact, I was—and still am—celebrating the here and now, expressing gratitude for still being alive.
My latest birthday is one of my most significant. It’s my required minimum distribution (RMD) birthday, meaning I just turned 73. With this birthday, I’ve achieved the final financial goal I set for myself. I wanted to hold off all withdrawals from my IRA—which I first opened when I was age 27—until I was forced to by the tax rules. To celebrate this milestone, I’ll be giving away my entire RMD as qualified charitable distributions (QCDs) to the charities I’ve selected. To help both me and one of the charities, a portion of my QCD will purchase a charitable gift annuity.
While I consider 73 to be a special birthday, I didn’t want any presents. It isn’t that I don’t like gifts. Rather, I don’t like what my wife buys me—because they’re usually things she thinks I need, not things I want. Often, it’s clothes that my wife would like to see me wear.
But this year was different. I received a ream of printer paper, a T-shirt that says “real cars don’t shift themselves,” a bag of Hershey’s dark chocolate kisses, a grabber because my son wants me to help him collect roadside trash, three lottery scratch-off tickets that yielded winnings of $6, and lunch at our favorite Mexican restaurant. In other words, my wife gave me things I needed and liked, and there wasn’t anything I had to return.
Now that I’ve notched my final financial milestone birthday, I’ll be measuring the passage of time in days, not years. Every day I’m alive is a reason to celebrate.
I have heard of people who have weekend-long, or week-long or month-long birthday celebrations. But mine will be a celebration every day for the rest of my life. I’m still breathing. What could be a better reason to celebrate?
I love this article for so many reasons. I am one of those wives who always buys what I want my husband to wear. Don’t blame me too much. He hates to shop. I love what she bought you this year. I’ll work on that. Oh, and he doesn’t mind shopping as much when we travel, so that will work.
Happy Birthday!
Thank you Dave, I also am so thankful for every day I’m given. I tell folks that my main job and focus is taking care of my health. Cool Shirt!
Wanna make sure that you get birthday / holiday presents that you like? Buy them yourself. My wife and I often buy our own presents, wrap them, and have the non-buying spouse open them on the day. I get what I want, and my wife gets “credit” for her thoughtfulness and gift-giving wisdom.
Great subject. We have a local community college that will create an endowed scholarship paying $500 a year for $15,000 based on a 3.5% distribution rate. Early years can be iffy on earnings so sometimes they need to take a year off on paying. Here is the best part, if you come up with the first 10k the college will go into their own foundation account and provide the last 5k. You can establish the scholarship in the name of someone or a cause for 30% off. My wife and I both have inherited stretch IRAs that we have used annual distributions to fund a scholarship for the last few years. My distribution is a RMD but because of my wife’s birthday this year, June 4th and 70, she misses the chance to do for a Qualified Charitable Distribution until next year, by four days. With the stretch IRAs we should have plenty of years ahead that we can choose to do this.
We’re birthday buddies, David. I celebrated my 73rd last week 😊🎂 Best Wishes.
Happy Birthday, Linda!
Mazel tov, David. Glad you had a great birthday.
I stopped observing birthdays the day the oncologist said “remission”… because from that point on, every day has been my birthday, full of gifts.
There’s always a reason to celebrate.
Right on Mike
Belated Happy birthday, Dave!
The title reminded me of the old Monty Python bit, an inspiring, hilarious (and gross) story of resilience in the face of adversity. 😉 Best wishes for many happy returns of your RMD day.
My 80th last year was creative too. My four children gave me 80 golf balls, 80 Baby Ruth candy bars (a favorite), 80 lottery tickets and 80 bags of microwave popcorn. The tickets yielded $67.00
I want that T-shirt Dave! My perspective on the passage of time changed to days at age 70 when we signed the contract to build our house. The reality that I could kick the bucket before the house was finished was the trigger.