Stop the Fussing
David Gartland | Jan 29, 2024
BILLY JOEL WROTE a song that declares, “I love you just the way you are.” But as parents, sometimes it isn’t easy to say those words about our children. We’re supposed to train them to succeed in life. We all probably think we’re excellent trainers, so—when our children don’t get it—it must be their fault. We did our part, so why don’t they learn? For parents of special needs children, things are different, but also similar. We also have to train our children for life. But they don’t learn or perform as “typical” children do. But good parents persevere, training their children in different ways or with more intensity. We all need to get to the finish line, so we can say, “I did my part.” But what happens if we never get to the finish line? What happens if the usual events that parents enjoy—graduations, marriages, grandchildren—never happen? That’s what I was facing. Luckily, in recent years, I’ve been able to look at my life differently. I’ve accepted my son for who he is, not for what he could be. I was afraid I’d feel I was giving up, but the opposite happened. I started to look at him as complete—that he couldn’t be anything more than what he is. I believe we all want to be better. Take our finances. We read books, try to save more, buy things when they’re on sale and take out loans when it makes sense. But when do we stop trying to make our finances better, and instead accept them for what they are? To me, the goal of accumulating money and having wealth is to live a comfortable life. We do it so that, at some point, we can stop struggling. Thinking we can always improve our finances—or always improve our children—can…
Read more » Seeking Answers
David Gartland | Jan 22, 2024
I LEARNED OF MY brother’s death by Googling his name. I always wondered whether his family would let me know if he was ill or had died. After Google led me to his obituary, I had my answer. My brother and I were co-executors and co-beneficiaries of my mother’s estate. From the start, we couldn’t agree on how to settle her affairs. I wanted to sell everything and divide by two, but he wanted to hold off selling my mother’s house. Why? My mother passed away in 2007, when home prices were down sharply, and my brother thought we should wait for the real estate market to recover. But there was another reason my brother didn’t want to sell: He, his wife and one of his adult sons were living in the place. Thus began a difficult estate settlement. In 2021, the house was finally sold and the proceeds divided, but we still hadn’t finished settling the estate when my brother died the following year. The disagreement over the estate caused a rift between my brother and me. In the years before his death, the only information I received came from his lawyer and the mortgage company. Not being notified of my brother’s deteriorating health or his death didn’t surprise me, but it did bother me. I believe in divine intervention. I’ve recently felt spurred to seek out information about how my brother died. My parents both had heart conditions. I assumed my brother and I would suffer the same fate, but I wanted to know for sure. I guessed the location where my brother likely died, and requested a death certificate from two local townships. I lucked out, and one of the towns sent along his death certificate. It didn’t show a heart condition as my brother’s cause of…
Read more » Health Is Wealth
David Gartland | Oct 22, 2024
A FEW YEARS AGO, I came across an announcement for a blueberry festival in Hammonton, New Jersey. My wife is always up for doing something different, so we made our way there one summer day. It turned out to be a great way to spend the day and learn the history of New Jersey’s blueberry industry. The industry was founded by a woman looking to expand the crops on her family’s farm around the turn of the 20th century. What I learned that day has changed my life—or, at least, what I eat for breakfast. First, the history: Elizabeth White was the oldest daughter of a cranberry farmer in the Pine Barrens section of New Jersey. She came across an article from the U.S. Department of Agriculture discussing what would be needed to turn blueberries from a wild species into a farmed crop. Elizabeth volunteered her family farm as the test site. It turned out that the sandy, acidic soil of coastal New Jersey was well-suited for blueberries. She cultivated several new blueberry varieties and then developed methods to boost production. Heavily populated New Jersey is still among the top six states for blueberry growing, producing more than 22,000 tons in 2022. What do blueberries have to do with personal finance? They’re considered a superfood, one that’s jam-packed with nutrients. This means that, from an efficiency standpoint, eating blueberries provides a large percentage of the daily nutrients our bodies need. The cost of health care in the U.S. is staggering. The older we get, the more our bodies tend to break down. The less money we spend on doctor visits and prescriptions, the more we have to invest or spend. Blueberries are my means to a healthier, wealthier life. I sprinkle blueberries on my cereal every morning. It may not…
Read more » Charging Ahead
David Gartland | Mar 28, 2024
I GREW UP DURING the muscle car era. That was when Detroit automakers became aware of the baby boomers’ buying power. The boomers, of whom I’m a proud member, didn’t live through the Great Depression. We had television, frozen foods, Mattel toys and a car in every driveway. Prosperity is what we were used to, and we loved it. It seemed everyone had jobs, so there was money to spend. My friends and I felt that having a nice car was the key to getting that special girl. This led boys to modify their jalopies to become hot rods. Seeing all this tinkering under the hood, Detroit decided to deliver fast cars right out of the showroom. No mechanical modifications were required to smoke your tires. The muscle car era had begun. What made these cars pop? In the beginning, it was simple: bigger V-8 engines. But these engines were gas guzzlers. When gas prices surged in 1980 to $1 a gallon and higher, car buyers still wanted speedy cars, but with more miles per gallon. The auto industry came up with two ways to increase horsepower without increasing the engine size—turbocharging and supercharging. With turbocharging, a fan blade spins more air into the engine’s cylinders, while another blade sucks out combusted fumes. More air going in draws more gasoline, resulting in a bigger bang and more horsepower. It doesn’t take any power from the engine to produce this increase in horsepower. The second way is supercharging. A blower forces more air into the engine. A pulley belt is attached to the engine to run the blower. It takes power from the engine to produce more horsepower. That makes it less efficient than turbocharging, but it can be faster off the line in short bursts. What does all this have…
Read more » Learning for Life
David Gartland | Jul 30, 2024
I HATED SCHOOL. There, I said it. From reading the bios of other HumbleDollar contributors, it appears most, if not all, enjoyed their academic experience. Many have gone on to acquire advanced degrees. I, too, went on to acquire post-college education, but only when my employer paid. But the best education I received wasn’t found in the classroom, but in day-to-day life. It came from observing what others did or didn’t do. This was my greatest source of knowledge. Everyone in my immediate family went to college, but no one earned a degree. Throughout my childhood, I kept hearing, “If only I’d finished my education, my life would be better.” I saw my father struggle at work. He was a white-collar worker without a college education. He attended Purdue University for chemical engineering, but left before earning a degree. He was surrounded by people with degrees who had more rewarding jobs. That taught me that, if I got a degree, I was more likely to enjoy my work, even if I didn’t enjoy every day. I was the person least qualified in my family to earn a degree, but what I did possess was perseverance. I could endure whatever it took to get that piece of paper. My education has continued ever since. A good friend of mine only had two jobs during his adult life. The first job was at an insurance company I worked at, and the second was at a Lowe's home-improvement store. The insurance company offered him early retirement at age 61, with a pension which could be taken as a lump sum or as an annuity. He took the lump sum. But he had strong feelings about helping less fortunate people from his native country, and he proceeded to donate the entire amount. Immediately after…
Read more » Retirement Ready
David Gartland | Jan 10, 2024
THE LAST TIME I HAD a job where I was eligible for a pension was 1994. People with pensions seem to count the days till they’re eligible to collect their monthly check. That makes sense: They know there’s gold at the end of their working life. I didn’t have this sort of “golden parachute.” If I didn’t save, I couldn’t retire. From 1994 on, funding my 401(k) and IRA were my only paths to a comfortable retirement. I never had a target amount. I just kept setting aside a portion of my salary in my 401(k) until I left that particular job. I’d then roll over the money to my IRA, being sure to advise the human resources department what I was doing. The first job I left, I didn’t make it clear to HR that I wanted to roll over the money to an IRA, rather than spend it, and a big chunk was withheld for taxes. Lesson learned. Based on my history of getting laid off, I knew the day would arrive when I couldn’t get another decent job and I’d need to accept retirement. This was a scary thought. I knew having enough money for retirement was important, but what would I do with my time? I kept a look out for articles that described the cost of retirement, places to live and things to do. They all sounded great for people with pensions. But what about people like me, who needed to rely on their savings? Then I found a quirky book titled The Joy of Not Working by Ernie J. Zelinski. There’s joy in not working? I never allowed myself that luxury. Working and making money were all I wanted and all I knew. I wasn’t that good at either, but it was what I…
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