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Stealing Joy

Luke Smith

IF YOU’RE A HISTORY buff, you know how difficult life was during the 1930s. In our modern American world of plenty, it can be hard to appreciate what life was like during that period. The Great Depression, as it was later dubbed, was a time of incredible strife and struggle.

Today, we have an unemployment rate of less than 4%. During the 1930s, it reached 25% in the U.S. Think about that. A quarter of the country was looking for work to feed their family, and couldn’t find any. Even those who could afford goods were faced with shortages of things like gas, sugar, fish, butter, eggs, cheese and meat. There was even a shortage of leather, causing people to ration shoes for their children. Can you imagine? I struggle to.

Learning about history is a great way to gain the perspective we so desperately need in our world of plenty. By some measures, people today are more unhappy than they were back then. Yet all of us, from the top 10% of income earners to the bottom 10%, are exponentially better off than we would been at earlier times in human history. We have come miles in almost every category that defines an affluent, civil society: human rights, shelter, poverty, starvation, clean water, heat, air conditioning, education, work conditions, employment rights. The list goes on and on.

Why then, if everything has gotten so much better, are people chronically unhappy? I have a theory. It comes down to a simple idea: Comparison is the thief of joy. We aren’t satisfied with having more when someone else has even more. We judge and grade our lives in comparison to our peers or, worse, celebrities. One thing is certain: Someone will always have more than we do.

One stimulant to our feelings of inadequacy may be social media. We see an endless stream of often carefully curated, meticulously edited and finely filtered posts from peers and from the rich and famous. Each post is created with the intent to illustrate an illusion of perfection. I don’t mean to claim that social media is inherently bad. It can be a great way to connect across the world. But when we use social media as the measuring stick for our life, we get a distorted view of reality that can lead to unhealthy comparisons. We might be tempted to ask, “Everyone looks so happy all the time. What’s wrong with me?”

Another reason we might feel that things are worse than they are: the current state of the news. Bad news sells, plus it spreads twice as fast as good news. You won’t see a headline tomorrow that reads, “Global Poverty Down Again for the 20th Decade in a Row.” I don’t mean to claim that following the news is bad. It can, however, cause us to become convinced that life is getting worse—when, by almost every measure, it’s getting objectively better all the time for most of the world. No, not perfect. But yes, better.

When it comes to finances, this game of comparison can cause us mental anguish, with feelings that we’re behind, or inadequate, or inferior. It can cause us to forget that our quality of life is so incredible, right here and right now. Worse even than the mental aspect, the comparison game can cause us to act irrationally. We may be attracted to dangerous investments we don’t understand because our neighbor purportedly got rich owning it. Berkshire Hathaway Vice Chairman Charlie Munger said it best at a recent meeting with his business partner, Warren Buffett: “The world is not driven by greed, it’s driven by envy.”

The grass is green where you water it. Gratitude is an antidote to envy. Keep that in mind when comparison tries to steal your joy.

Luke Smith is a CFP® professional and practicing financial planner. He creates customized financial plans for each family he works with around the country. Luke pursued financial planning to combine his two favorite passions: finance and people. He spends his free time with his wife Heather and their family in Maryland. Outside of work, Luke enjoys the outdoors, golf, reading and writing. You can reach him at Luke.Smith@Wealthspire.com. Check out Luke’s earlier articles.

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Michael l Berard
1 year ago

I laugh when I hear so many people lamenting the “good old days”. I keep , just as a reminder , many items from decades ago, that used to belong to my grandparents. I have gasoline rationing stamps, a radio that is about three feet tall and two feet wide , it must weigh about fifty pounds. It is nothing more than a radio.

Years ago, no Social Security or unemployment insurance. OSHA, the FDA and welfare were non-existent. World travel is done in a fraction of the time as compared to years ago, prior to air travel.

Smart phones, online bill payments, investing costs virtually zero, automobiles, much better medical services, and so many more. we truly have it made.

Donny Hrubes
2 years ago

In Colorado it’s snowing at the moment. Some hate it!
My oldest son and wife sent a picture of their two hands holding cups of hot cocoa, looking out the window. Aaaaa yes, life is good!

Jack McHugh
2 years ago

Alas, I fear the sources of deep unhappiness among broad swaths of the most recent generations have far more to do with the culture and society than material conditions. Specifically, deep confusion about what makes life worth living.

This is a personal finance site so I’ll say no more, but I think the thesis as stated has a big hole in it.

Chazooo
2 years ago

As we all sit in comfort reading this article via the Internet, we should be feeling incredible gratitude for simply being able to do this. It goes a long way as explanation why millions of people are risking their lives to cross our southern border illegally from over 180 countries just to share this wonderful opportunity with us.

David Lancaster
2 years ago

My mother in law was born in 1921 and just had her birthday on Christmas Day. She doesn’t talk much about the depression. To this day she still is very frugal due to living through the Depression and still having limited income her entire life. She doesn’t have many “things” but is rich in following the lives of friends and family via the phone and her iPad. She can tell you almost all the names, their ages, occupations, and what they’re involved with.

if you are interested in discovering more about the Depression and governmental intervention read these books;

The Great Depression: A Diary, by Ledbetter and Roth.
A diary, discovered by the son, of a lawyer living in Youngstown, Ohio. I thought my mother in law would be interested in this perspective but she said, “I lived through it, and don’t need to read about it”.

The Woman Behind the New Deal: The Life and Legacy of Frances Perkins… by Downey.
This chronicles the life of FDR’s Labor Secretary, a little known woman to those living today (my mother in law knows very well of her) who was instrumental in the passing of Social Security, Unemployment Insurance, and The Minimum Wage, all of which were instrumental bills which have helped to limit poverty.

Donny Hrubes
2 years ago

My Dad was on a farm in the depression years. He was blissfully unaware as every thing needed was provided on that lil farm.
I feel self reliance is also a key to happiness.

Jeff Bond
2 years ago

My parents grew up in the depression. My mother couldn’t talk about it without crying. The amount of suffering during that time is unimaginable to me – – – so I know I’ve got it good.

OldITGuy
2 years ago

Thanks for the uplifting article. It’s good to be reminded of just how great things are in so many ways and it’s a lovely way to start the day. Thanks.

M Plate
2 years ago

When we dispense common sense advice about working hard, saving, and investing, they dismiss us as boomers. I can only imagine what they’d call us if we brought of the Great Depression.

An
2 years ago
Reply to  M Plate

The Silent Generation – people born from 1901 to 1927. Both my parents became adults during the Great Depression and each served our country in active duty on the 2 fronts in WWII.

Richard Gore
2 years ago
Reply to  M Plate

Who are the They? The vast majority of the younger generation individuals that I know are hard working and are following sound financial principles just as much as most boomers did.

Mike Wyant
2 years ago
Reply to  Richard Gore

Exactly. It’s ridiculous when a commenter makes sweeping generalizations. Especially when “they” pit one generation against another. I have 3 adult children, interact with many more and the vast majority are just as you described.

R Quinn
2 years ago
Reply to  M Plate

Didn’t you know that “common sense, working hard, saving, and investing,” doesn’t work anymore because everything is unfair? 😃

Each generation faces its own challenges and unique opportunities. And the 21st century is far from the worst of times and still provides plenty of opportunities- perhaps more than ever before if you take the time to look.

An
2 years ago
Reply to  R Quinn

I believe what Charles Dickens said is true for every generation.
““It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of light, it was the season of darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair.””
We are all the same but different.

M Plate
2 years ago

I lack the eloquence of you and Charlie. Instead of admiring and trying to learn from accomplished people, too many just want to steal their share and call it social justice.

R Quinn
2 years ago

Great perspective. Being born in 1943, I don’t remember the depression, but my parents and grandparents did and often talked about it. The period of WWII was no bowl of fruit either. I remember my parents showing me their left over ration stamps for sugar and a little machine my father had to roll cigarettes.

People living in the 21st century have a limited perspective on just about everything. History is a great teacher if we only listen.

In the 1920s that average home had 1500 sf, today new homes average 2500 with smaller family sizes. Only Australia beats the US.

parkslope
2 years ago
Reply to  R Quinn

According to one source, the average home in 1920 was only 1,048 square feet, and 983 sf ft in 1950.
https://247wallst.com/special-report/2016/05/25/the-size-of-a-home-the-year-you-were-born/1/

R Quinn
2 years ago
Reply to  parkslope

Must be the neighborhood 😎

John Yeigh
2 years ago

100% agree. Keeping up with the Jones’ has been supplanted by the false vision to keep up with the Kardashians.

Mik Cajon
2 years ago

Exodus 20:17

Michael l Berard
2 years ago

I agree with everything you wrote. I was tidying up the house, and I happened upon some gasoline ration coupons from WW II, my grandfather worked at a factory that supplied war materiel, so he had more coupons than others. He used to walk a mile to take the bus to work, and never complained, and lived in a 600 sq ft house , with grandma and two children. They came from Finland and were perfectly happy with their lives. We truly have it made, every generation gets to enjoy, at least here, constant upgrades, improving life quality. Even Social Security had only been around for about 80 years , or so. For some, that is all they have, what would they have done a hundred years ago? We have subsidized housing, AFDC and on and on .

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