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Who are them and they?

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AUTHOR: R Quinn on 7/16/2024

Exactly who are them and they?

It seems these two folks, them and they, are responsible for most of our problems, especially financial problems, a least that’s the way some – many – people see things.

A women on Treads this morning was complaining she had to pay a Medicare premium bill – before starting Social Security – within 12 days.  According to her the Medicare system is a joke. Her plan to get even was going to the doctor just to make them have to pay for that bill. I pointed out that “them” is her fellow taxpayers.

Another person wrote, if you have the funds and you can, why won’t they let you? I was told retiring at 62 is too early and it’s better to wait. Who won’t let you?

I overheard a person say, If we didn’t go to work. If we didn’t buy it, they wouldn’t have what they have, control. They’re our enemy. The topic was the “rich.” I often wonder how them and they exercise control over us. Them or they often have more stuff than we do, we can envious of them though.

Them and they tax us, make laws, employ us, deny us things we want, even block opportunity, seemingly controlling our lives.

If we don’t understand, if we don’t like the outcome or don’t achieve our goals, them and they are usually to blame.

The reality is them and they are people, lots of people typically making up institutions, government agencies, etc. But it’s not generalized them we should be blaming, it’s ourselves.

Our lack of awareness, our actions or not taking responsibility are more often to blame for the things we dislike or find difficult to cope with.

They and them are all around us, except in a mirror.

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Bob Harrison
3 months ago

Once again, you’ve written a terrific article. Thank you. Hearing they/them being blamed for all sorts of maladies is one of my pet peeves.

Life ends up being so much easier if you simply take responsibility for your own decisions and life.

Nick Politakis
3 months ago

I thought you were talking about non binary individuals who refer to themselves as they.

Jeff Bond
3 months ago
Reply to  Nick Politakis

I thought that at first, until I read through it further.

Jeff Bond
3 months ago

I work very hard (and sometimes fail) to eliminate “them” and “they” from conversations – so I can be as specific as possible in describing who I’m talking about. My experience with raising two sons and being the Scoutmaster to a troop of Boy Scouts taught me that it is very difficult to know who “them” or “they” may be.

bbbobbins
3 months ago

Well the rot starts at the highest levels when it comes to references to the bogeymen of “they” and “them”? Probably can’t say more than that without being political.

I just take it as a reference to those elements of organisations or authorities that the user can’t be bothered or is unable to articulate with precision or who may not even exist in the form the user would hypothesise.

Last edited 3 months ago by bbbobbins
Dan Smith
3 months ago

I’ve long wondered who writes the stuff that “they” say…..
I can’t speak for everyone, but I will say that most of my wounds have been self-inflicted. If I hadn’t realized that truth I never would have gotten to my happy place in life.

Matt Morse
3 months ago

Good thoughts, R. Taking personal responsibility for our situation in life is not only more productive, but results in more happiness, in my opinion.

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