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I have on occasion criticized politicians and/or people of wealth for not remembering where they came from. Other times I have read articles enumerating retirement account balances by age, and commented negatively about young people’s failure to prepare for their future.
There is validity to feeling that way to a certain extent, still, in doing so we may be denying our own past. While I’m proud to have achieved a two comma net worth, that didn’t happen until sometime in our 7th decade of life, and for Chris and me it’s a family achievement, not an individual one.
A homeowner at 20, married at 21, two kids before 30, and a partner that didn’t share my philosophy on money, I didn’t save a cent. Although I tried, I couldn’t even build an emergency fund. Chrissy and I got together in our late 40s, but our financial purchase didn’t fully take hold until several years after that.
I need to remind myself to take a look in the mirror every so often, and remember where I came from.
Agreed Dan. My perspective on this usually relates to the good fortune that I have had. Born into a stable, middle class family in Australia, and then provided the opportunity for a university education. Yeah, I worked pretty hard and perhaps made a few good decisions along the way, but my initial good luck can’t be ignored, particularly if I feel inclined to judge others.
Dan, I agree 100% and I know exactly the point you are trying to make. When I look in the mirror, I see that I had good parents especially an excellent mom who taught me so much. So I was lucky I had a good foundation. I also see that I built on that foundation and was able to fulfill my financial goals and live well in retirement.
Or, as in my case, I’ve pretty much tried to do the opposite of what my parents did as to money…
I know that one way or another, we learn from our parents, so I find it interesting that some siblings get opposite lessons. I’m a saver, my brother not so much.
Good point, Dan. My sister is in a very different place than I am yet with same home environment, same basic education. But with no clue about prudently handling money and no investments of any kind. They struggle to pay monthly bills and yet they have SS, a military pension and a corporate pension, no mortgage.
Very similar situation. Brother has a very nice public pension, and now Social Security, and finally no mortgage, so they actually do okay.
Me too.
Not sure of your point Dan. Looking at your past and seeing you did achieve your goals is not a negative. It’s an accomplishment, and achieving such goals is open to nearly everyone on one level or another.
I started after high school with nothing, Connie and I started seven years later with nothing and then lived in a way that allowed us to achieve every goal on one income.
As I have said many times, with a good job and no serious misfortune.
When I look in the mirror my first thought is “thank you for the good fortune” and the next “well done.”
I think you underestimate the costs of two income couples— and more than things like childcare. In a one paycheck household , the money earner is fee to focus on his/her career goals. Not true with two people who want careers. Often a location that works for one will not for the other. One may have to seriously compromise or postpone opportunities. And, of course, there’s no dinner ready to be served when two earners come home from work. Two paychecks are nice— but to reach them, many couples do take on heavy costs.
Actually I wasn’t even thinking about that, but you certainly have a valid point. Connie working after we had children was never considered. I suppose we could have afforded a nicer house, etc. but never thought about that.
There was a short period when her former employer asked her to do the same job at home and she did work at home at night. When the children were into or out of high school, she worked part time in a doctor’s office. No idea what she earned, it was her spend money.
She had no desire for a career other than family and did a great deal of volunteer work in the children’s schools, church, etc. At one point she was in charge of the high school marching band uniforms (50) mending and getting them cleaned after each competition.
It’s not at all a negative, and it’s fine to be proud of our achievements (while at the same time, acknowledging no serious misfortune). My point is to not be judgemental, and to remain….. Humble.
“acknowledging no serious misfortune” … Is that the same thing as luck or being in the right place at the right time? 🙂
I would say there is a slight difference, some potential misfortune can be planned for and avoided.