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I seem to fit the profile of a typical guy who had the good fortune of retiring in his late fifties. I spend a considerable amount of time doing physical activities: racket sports, cycling, running, hiking. I’m also a keen reader of history, science and financial content. I volunteer my time coaching sports development courses and volunteering at a local church youth group, lots of very fruitful and productive activities to be getting on with.
When you add in working in my large garden, hanging out with my wife and social engagements with friends and family, plus handling the school run and childcare for my grandkids, I really don’t get a lot of downtime. I’m also one of those strange individuals who doesn’t watch TV with any regularity. But I have, from what I can ascertain, one frowned-upon time-wasting little pleasure I enjoy indulging in.
Video games are that little guilty pleasure. I don’t get much time to indulge, but I love a few hours of online killing mayhem playing Call of Duty or a few snatched hours playing Tiger Woods Golf. Nobody I know who’s my age ever seems to admit to spending a few hours with a bit of gaming… I seem to be a sample size of one in my social circle.
To be honest, I really don’t feel guilty. Why should I? I seem to spend a lot of time listening to my friends discussing the plotlines of the latest Netflix series they devote many happy hours to watching, but if I ever mention my gaming interest, they turn up their nose and suggest I could find better things to do with my limited spare time. What? Watch a miniseries maybe? No thanks.
What strikes me as particularly odd is how arbitrary these judgments seem. Spend six hours binge-watching a Danish crime thriller and you’re cultured. Spend two hours playing a strategic video game and you’re wasting your life. Both involve sitting in front of a screen, both are forms of escapism. Yet somehow we’ve collectively decided that passive consumption is respectable while interactive entertainment is frivolous.
Is it a generational thing? Probably. Is it a class thing? Possibly. But mostly I think it’s just prejudice dressed up as concern. My friends will happily dissect characters and plot twists from their latest streaming obsession for an entire dinner party, but mention that I’ve just completed a particularly challenging mission and the conversation dies. The implicit message is clear: your hobby is less valid than mine. But nobody can quite articulate why.
I suspect there are more of us out there than anyone realizes, closet gamers of a certain retirement age, quietly enjoying our hobby while everyone else assumes we’re watching Masterpiece Theatre or tending roses. If you’re one of them, consider this your invitation to come out of the shadows. We’re not harming anyone, we’re having fun, and honestly, our hand-eye coordination is probably better than most of our Netflix/Britbox watching peers. Game on.
Thanks Mark. Not too far back there was a post from someone struggling with being retired. This post offers some useful insight about the topic.
Dan, the key takeaway I was trying to get across is this: While I certainly advocate for constructive retirement activities (like the ones in my first paragraph), remember that it is absolutely okay—even essential—to pursue a passion that is a completely nonproductive “time sink.” Don’t allow social expectations to steer you away from something you want to do just for yourself. Its only meaningful result needs to be your own satisfaction.
I’m a different sort of “gamer” — I watch Chicago sports teams and European soccer.
I would never even try to calculate how much of my free time is spent watching athletes propel balls in various ways. And then chatting about them on websites or WhatsApp groups.
Waste of time? Undoubtedly. But if how we are entertained is the topic here, that’s my contribution.
We’re pretty similar, only difference is I spend an awful lot of time trying to hit balls lol
Why should HD readers care about this topic?? Your earlier articles were interesting, but like RQ I suspect you don’t have enough to say to justify a daily submission,
When teaching my daughters, I emphasized that respect should be given to others. I also instructed them that in the rare instance of encountering a rude or bullying person, they should first call out the unacceptable behavior, and then ignore them, as we can’t know the root cause of their antisocial actions.
In the spirit of practicing what I preached, my only acceptable response to your comments is to humbly ignore you and any further contributions you feel the need to share
Not to worry— I’m not wasting any more time in this old guys club!
Isn’t it just a jumping off point into a bit of self-reflection?
There’s a saying which goes “We don’t stop playing because we get old, we get old because we stop playing”.
And for those approaching or trying to envisage retirement they do need something of an image or a plan for how they are going to spend their days else initial euphoria and the feeling of “I can do anything” risks decaying into listlessness and boredom.
So my takeaway is that Mark is saying that between all the “good” intents of retirement – good for health, good for relationships, good for community, good for continuing education it’s ok to carve out some “wasteful” time and that needn’t fit a prescribed format.
Very well said BB. I need to work on the directness of my writing instead of faffing around the edges.
Now do 50+ D&Ders.
Or WarHammer 40K players.
Or Contract Bridge.
Or Chess.
Or Mahjohng.
Have at it Marilyn, share some of your words of wisdom with us. Justify a Forum post of your own. I for one welcome different points of view, especially if they are unique.
WIFE: “What are you doing?”
HUSBAND: “Nothing.”
WIFE: “You did that yesterday.”
HUSBAND: “I didn’t finish.”
😂
Gee Mark, it’s a good thing you didn’t include the word “rant” in the title or the topic police would be all over you. I watch Art Perspective on YouTube regularly. Personally I’m offended by your wasting time with video games. 😁
1978…what a year. That’s when I got my first games console, and I’ve been a bit of a disappointment ever since. Better pull myself together and quit wasting time gaming, or I’ll never have a proper career and actually be able to retire 😉
But the difference is he isn’t punching down on people or extrapolating entire character judgements from single observations.
There is an interesting nugget here around where societally we rank activities in terms of worthiness where the enjoyment and worth of them is entirely personal. Is Breaking Bad better than La Traviata? One person’s dream cruise is another’s travelling prison etc…
I suspect we don’t hear much about senior gamers because its a hobby they have learned to mask in social situations. “Sorry darling I really don’t want to go to that Am Dram production even if Barbara is in it, the latest Call of Duty has just dropped and I’d far rather do some virtual slaughter”.
And you thought that was a serious analogy, not exaggeration simply to make a point about irresponsible actions? I can’t help but wonder if those protesting the loudest and offended the most found themselves looking in a mirror.
I proposed that irresponsible behavior is reflected in many aspects of life and people are offended at character judgements and yet in another post those people are willing to assume all billionaires are greedy tax cheats helping to destroy our economy.
Perhaps don’t derail another thread with wilfully tone-deaf self-justification.
Care to comment on the actual topic of “social acceptance”?
…. but mention that I’ve just completed a particularly challenging mission and the conversation dies.
Yeah, I get the same thing if I mention my virtual friends and pen pals at HumbleDollar.
And how about that new Three Musketeers series on Netflix!
Three Musketeers… I better ask Suzie for my opinion on that, I’m sure she’s watched it 😂
You could start a website for mid-50’s and up gamers. Retirement optional. Maybe call it HumbleGamer.com. It might catch on. 🙂
Now wouldn’t that be a cool retirement hobby!