FREE NEWSLETTER
MY LIFE’S GOAL WAS to make money. I make no apologies for this. I’m not particularly gifted in this pursuit, but I did persevere.
I take satisfaction that I stuck to my goal despite all obstacles. There were many trips, falls, mistakes and failures along the way. I had to work hard and seek a new job each time my old employment ended. I set out to do something—and I did it.
That all changed when I retired. It felt like crossing the finish line at the New York City Marathon. I’d completed my career race at last. It was a good feeling. Knowing that someday I’d reach that finish line was a vital part of my motivation.
The satisfaction now is to look back on my journey and see what I accomplished. I fought the good fight. I’m proud of never giving up. But now, I move on to other goals, the ones that I still have time for. We are all given one lifetime. The longest will be about 100 years.
Using 100 as a measuring stick, where are you on your 100-year timeline—and what’s next? What would you do today if you had just one week to live? I hope you’d feel fulfilled, that you’ve done what you wanted to do all along. The goals you pursued might not be what your friends and family thought you should do. Still, if you did what you wanted, you should have no regrets.
If this isn’t true for you, I’d advise you to get going. What do you think you should be doing? The more you do things of your own choosing, the better you’ll feel. Retirement is a perfect time to think selfishly. Doing one selfish thing, while you do 10 things for others, will motivate you to keep going.
Remember, you’re trying to live the rest of your life with zero regrets—to be on your deathbed and think, “I had a good life.” Life is a gift. When you receive a gift, the giver would love to see your appreciation. The way to show that appreciation is to enjoy each day. If you use the day for a guilty pleasure, good for you. The idea is to use the day for what would make you happy.
This might make others happy too—or perhaps not. To be sure, you need goals that won’t disrupt your home life. Breaking your marriage vows or the law might not be a smart move. I hope you’re thinking of goals like skydiving, pursuing hobbies, or visiting places you’ve been pondering for a long time. Let the urgency of a limited lifetime motivate you to accomplish your ambitions.
Maybe you’ll be lucky and have 100 years to work with. Think of all the things you could accomplish. The opportunities are endless. But also remember the expression “time’s a-wasting” applies to us all. We don’t have an unlimited supply of years.
WHEN THEY ENTER retirement, many folks seem to lose their sense of purpose, especially men who’ve held the traditional role of breadwinner and provider. Once that aspect of their life ends, guys often start to question their purpose.
Our life’s meaning is based on who we are. Some of us are brilliant thinkers. Others are great friends to many. Yet others offer inspiration to the younger generation based on their careers as public servants. We all have a unique combination of gifts. To find meaning, we should apply those gifts in whatever way they can be best used.
That brings me to everybody who reads, writes for and comments on HumbleDollar. Is the subject of money and investing easy for you to understand? Are you comfortable discussing finance with others? Within your social circle, you’re probably the finance whiz, even if you don’t think of yourself that way.
We can use this money sense to provide meaning to the lives of others—by teaching those who are less financially savvy at handling money.
We all know people who are terrible with money. Some tune out as soon as they hear phrases like cost basis or capital gains. Others never acquire the savings habit. Many spend far too freely.
For those who are comfortable with money, advising others on their financial challenges can provide a life’s purpose. To put your gift to work, start by finding your tribe. Join with others who share your interest in spreading financial literacy.
Some people think finance is selfish. I was once told, “The love of money is a sin.” That’s not true. Money is a tool. A hammer in the hands of a skilled carpenter is a thing of beauty.
If your gift is developing friendships, people will praise you for having many friends. Why should the gift of handling money intelligently be viewed any different? Don’t hide your light under a bushel. Embrace your gift and pass it on.
GEORGE BURNS, one half of the legendary comedy duo Burns and Allen, had a secret to a long and fulfilling life. “Always have a reason to get up in the morning,” he said.
That reason doesn’t have to be world peace or saving starving children. It just needs to be something that’s important to you.
Retirement experts often advise that we find a grand purpose—an encore career or running the board at a local nonprofit. But what if “purpose” sounds intimidating? What if simply picking up trash with your son on a daily walk becomes your reason to rise and shine?
Collecting trash may sound mundane. The act takes on greater meaning, though, when viewed through the lens of environmentalism. On our walks, my son and I focus on aluminum cans, those 100% recyclable wonders. Every one we pick up means one less can in a landfill. It may be a small contribution, but it’s ours.
My son, driven by an innate desire to clean, leads the way. He’ll crawl under bushes and climb hills to retrieve discarded items. The reward he gets is the shout-outs from people walking past or the horn toots when cars drive by. His autism prevents him from acknowledging these positive encounters, but he hears them and it makes him smile.
My son loves to collect trash and recyclables wherever they are. My job is to find honey pot locations with lots of trash. These are usually near industrial sites or close to highways, those in between places where people apparently feel free to throw bottles and cans out the car window.
Litterers may be bad actors, but we don’t care who littered or why. Removing the burden of judgment makes picking up the trash easier. The beauty of our activity is its simplicity. Our only expense is the cost of an occasional replacement grabber for my son. That’s a far cry from the extravagant expenses of, say, a golf-centered retirement.
What started as my son’s fascination with trash has become a shared obsession—a commitment to leaving these neglected areas cleaner than we found them. It’s a niche with no competition, and the satisfaction we gain is immeasurable.
Is my purpose to save the environment or simply make my son happy? Perhaps both, which is a win-win in my book.
I now understand George Burns’s wisdom. He booked a gig at the London Palladium for his 100th birthday, underlining his reason to get up each morning. He did live a century and seven weeks more but, in the end, was too unwell to perform on his 100th birthday. Still, his advice resonates: Find your purpose, big or small, so you find joy in each new day.
David Gartland was born and raised on Long Island, New York, and has lived in central New Jersey since 1987. He earned a bachelor’s degree in math from the State University of New York at Cortland and holds various professional insurance designations. Dave’s property and casualty insurance career with different companies lasted 42 years. He’s been married 36 years, and has a son with special needs. Dave has identified three areas of interest that he focuses on to enjoy retirement: exploring, learning and accomplishing. Pursuing any one of these leads to contentment. Check out Dave’s earlier articles.
Want to receive our weekly newsletter? Sign up now. How about our daily alert about the site's latest posts? Join the list.
Very well written and insightful article, Dave.
I am glad that you managed to find new goals in retirement.
Was your goal in life previously really to make money? This seems very superficial; surely you took pride in doing a job well, even if it was personal investing.
The people I have known who really only focused on making money seem shallow and can never admit they have reached their goals. How much is enough?
The people I have known who were the happiest were people who had jobs they loved so much they would do them for free, like Buffett.
I remember waiting for my medical school admittance interview with several other candidates.
One announced loudly that he thought becoming a doctor was stupid ( I guess his parents had forced him) because he could make more money by taking the tuition money and investing it.
I doubt he was ever very happy in anything he did.
Good points I imagine the answer lies somewhere in between earning good income and a rewarding career. I suspect Dave found his career rewarding as well.
Lovely reflections, David. You and I had very different purposes in life, but ultimately arrived at the same overarching philosophy about daily joy.
And not being a parent myself, I enjoy seeing and hearing about other people’s successful parenting practices. Your story about your son made me smile.
Thanks for this.
Dave, I love how you are able to connect with your son. You are truly a wonderful father. How lucky you both are to be able to share these times with one another. Your story made my day. Thanks for the gift.
Dave, especially loved the post about you and your son picking up trash. I thought it was very well written. Thanks for the inspiration today. Chris
David, to begin I’d just like to say how great it is that you and your son are to have each other. My dad doubled as my best friend, especially during his final decades. Seems like you and your son are similar.
On regrets, like Sinatra I’ve had a few. Often times I wish I had started my tax business at a much younger age, and probably my first wife and I weren’t the best match for either of us. Then I realize that a different path would have erased my daughters and their beautiful families, and I probably wouldn’t now be with Chris, who has enriched my life exponentially through our years together.
Like Quinn below, I don’t have any grand plans, but good stuff pops up all the time. Grandkid stuff, lunch with old friends, getting to know the new neighbors, projects around the house, even this HumbleDollar breakfast club. Two phrases often uttered by Chris are “we got a lot done today” and “do we have a good life”. The answer to both is a resounding yes.
Great article! Thanks for sharing. I don’t want to live to be 100 if my brain doesn’t go along for the ride.
When I was 18 I had several goals, to become rich, to marry and have a family and to become a corporate executive- all this while looking for any job I could find after high school, any job.
The family goal started when I was twenty-five, the others took another 45 years plus. Nevertheless, I have no complaints, no regrets, no unfulfilled goals.
I retired in Jan 2010 with absolutely no goals or purpose in mind except a desire to travel. My wife’s mobility issues at age 86 have slowed the travel to a trickle, but no regrets. Only one place on my original goal list is missing – Iceland.
There is something to do everyday in retirement, many mundane I admit, but still to do. However, I welcome days waking up with absolutely no plans for the day, no place to be.
Last week I attended a grandsons school event for veterans.
This morning and tomorrow I will play golf – even in November in NJ – with new friends acquired when we moved to our condo in 2018. In a few weeks we will head to Cape Cod for a week or so for holiday festivities.
I just joined the finance committee for our HOA, yet to be determined as a wise move.
I have no purpose, stuff just comes along. I go with the flow. Grandchildren generate plenty of opportunities to attend this or that, go here or there.
My frequently maligned retirement income strategy allows no worries about spending and yet my obsession with investments causes me to check on them at least once a day.
I think the part of life called retirement is over analyzed and over-thought.
As far as reaching 100 goes, there are caveats for me. Being in reasonable health, fully able to function and having family around are key for me. Otherwise I see no reason.