Quality of Life

November is my birthday month. A good time for reflection. With advancing age, we can all give more thought to how we can improve the quality of our lives—enjoy our days and gain peace of mind. When we don’t have as much life left, we want to maximize the time we have.

One of my pet peeves has always been dealing appropriately with rude and disrespectful people. With maturity, we are motivated to avoid jerks and futile conflicts. And we learn how to regulate our emotions to mitigate the effects rude people have on our psyche.

But there are some situations you can’t always avoid.  The next time someone cuts you off in traffic, Don’t assume that they are only rude to you. Truth be told, that person is rude to everyone—even their mother. If their parents didn’t teach them how to be considerate in 25 years or so, how are you going to improve their bad manners by invoking your anger.

Let’s put things in perspective— When we take whatever others think, do, or say personally, we are allowing others to offend us. The fact is that some humans possess a large number of negative traits that lead to inconsiderate words and actions. Learn to ignore disrespectful words and actions, as these people are doing the very same thing to others. They can’t help it; It’s just in their nature to be that way.  Often they are just malcontents— Out there, looking for a dog to bite in the”A – double scribble.”

Granted you want a world in which everyone is as considerate as you are. I think you know this won’t happen. Don’t take it as a personal affront.  Do you really need their respect and approval?

While you can give someone a piece of your mind when you’re angry or irritated, you will only achieve peace of mind by letting your anger go. The human condition is such that anger is the first emotion to well up when we’re offended, but the sooner we can quell  negative thoughts and feelings, the happier we will be.

Sometimes, we struggle to regulate our emotions.  It helps me to think of courteous people; strangers, I might encounter in my daily errands who smile at me in passing, hold doors open for me— And even help me unload my groceries from the shopping cart onto the cashiers counter at the Food market.  Little do these strangers know how much they contribute to a more pleasant world.

Have you let someone get under your skin? It will only frustrate you and ruin your day.  So the next time someone slights you, hurts your feelings, or irritates you with harsh or disrespectful comments, take a pause. Resist ruminating over it. Trust me, if happiness is one of your goals it’s just not worth it.