Unfortunately, overly aggressive student loan programs have contributed to the expense. Ready access to these loan proceeds at the student level have let the universities charge unfettered tuition and fees. In a round about way, individual saving programs, like the 529s , will create a more discerning consumer and help keep universities in check. Assuming they are widely adopted and the student loan programs are reigned in.
This is a tough one. In a perfect world, where resources such as time and money are unlimited, I think most kind hearted people would do everything they could for their parents, regardless of relationship. But we don’t live in that world. I didn’t have a father growing up, so was raised by mother. She’s a very sweet lady, but was neglectful and willful. I say this with no joy or judgement, but rather as a father who has gone through almost the full lifecycle of raising my own children. I raised them the way I would have liked to have been brought up. I didn’t let my hardscrabble childhood define me so much as drive me. It’s worked out fairly well. Getting myself educated and having a career meant moving away from the east side of Buffalo. So, I have siblings there who had the benefit of my mother’s help in raising their kids as de facto nanny. Again, no judgement, But I made sure my children were provided for and looked after properly. As we know, proper childcare, on top of saving for college, is a heavy lift. Theres more layers to this, but the long and short is I’ll be looking at my younger sister to step up after the many many years of having monopolized my mothers’ generous help in order for her to avoid childcare expenses during multiple divorces. My mother has dementia and will need adequate care as she’s getting worse. She remarried 5 years ago and her husband is shocked at this turn of events ( newsflash - health problems happen after age 70) Yes, we’ve done well financially, but by the same token I do not see the logic in sacrificing everything my wife and I have worked for in order to have a fancier nursing home. I’ll be letting my sister and my mothers husband take care of it.
Context matters in these situations. If you have a long time before you need the funds, it might be worth considering. However, you earmarked these funds as ‘emergency’ for a reason. What’s changed other than events that you have no control over?
With the market doing so well these past few years since Covid, we were really ‘ahead of the game’ in a good way. Recognizing that and recognizing the geo political volatility going on (the Ukraine war, the assassination attempts on candidate Trump), I felt we needed to lock in some gains and see where things were headed. We moved about 70% of our 401k’s into some conservative, capital preservation funds back in January. We kept our Roth’s, HSA and IRA’s in the market. I also moved my son’s 529 into the equivalent capital preservation. It turned out he was appointed to the Naval Academy, so we wouldn’t be drawing heavily from it for college expenses. But, we’re still moving the annual Roth IRA amount for him from that account. At his young age, it all goes into the market. The rest will be there after he graduates. I’m grateful it’s not being impacted. I wish I could say that I foresaw what’s currently happening, but it was just a feeling. I thought we might be due for a mild recession (the law of gravity , what goes up, must come down at some point). What motivated me more were the financial goals we hit. When you’ve won the game, stop playing….
There are many, but I’d say the first time we took our kids to Hawaii and walked out to a beautiful sunrise our first morning there with them - seeing a place like Hawaii through their young eyes was just magical. The surf, sun, gentle breeze and their energetic, happy voices.
Thank you Jonathan. I will continue to refer these four things as time goes by. As my last Saturday comment to your last Saturday article, I leave you with this Stephen King Quote, who I feel captures my feelings best -“The most important things are the hardest things to say. They are things you get ashamed of, because words make them smaller. When they were in your head they were limitless; but when they come out they seem to be no bigger than normal things. But that's not all. The most important things lie too close to wherever your secret heart is buried; they are clues that could guide your enemies to a prize they would love to steal. It's hard and painful for you to talk about these things ... and then people just look at you strangely. They haven't understood what you've said at all, or why you almost cried while you were saying it"
our first house in Colorado - all we needed was a nice starter house; instead, we ended up purchasing a gigantic 5,000 sq ft home by the foot hills. The logic being we’d fill it with kids and never move, so why start small? We moved to Atlanta 18 months later. Oy vey!
not being aggressive enough to invest disposable income in an after tax portfolio early on - definite missed opportunity
I pre paid in full for an advanced it certificate course that I wound up having no interest in finishing - of course, no refunds
i probably became a little too conservative the last few years when the market peaked and wanted to take some money off the table
my wife and I always held on to our jobs, even after the kids were born ; our thinking was one of us was bound to be laid off, especially around 2008-2010, but it just didn’t happen. Don’t know if it’s a mistake, but knowing what I do now, one of us definitely could have stayed home; but, we were able to work remotely and had a nanny so the kids were always home and someone was at home, we were able to save more money for retirement and the kids’ 529 as a result
As I’m on the other side of 50, with my wife and I closing in on retirement, I have the perspective that a robust before and after tax portfolio brings. I have Jonathan and everyone here to partly thank for that. it wasn’t easy. Like some others, I grew up in a hardscrabble existence. We had no money for anything. What has stayed with me is the stress of a job loss that would spell doom in the form of being evicted and starting at yet another new school. After college, I had a Masters degree, but $36K in student loans and no financial savvy at that point. The good news was I was a tech guy entering the job market at the beginning of the 90s tech boom. I also had a subscription to the WSJ and the ‘Getting Going’ column filled with Jonathan’s practical writing. The loans would soon be retired. Budgeting , saving and investing came through trial and error, but we got there. The things that have stayed with me were the financial stress from my early teen years - experiencing not having any money and not knowing where the next job is coming for your family is incredibly stressful. The other guiding principal that stayed with me is around personal expenditure - I don’t mind spending money that has been budgeted to be spent, but I want something for my money - don’t waste it, get what you paid for. The rest of my principals came from Jonathan - understanding the value of index funds, the ‘tipping point’ that happens from regular investing and understanding that an ‘average working person’ can become wealthy/comfortable via regular budgeting, saving and investing. In other words, quit hoping to win the lottery - there’s no magic to it. Believe it or not, sometimes people need to actually be told this. Thank you for the impact you’ve had on my life and my kids’ lives Jonathan!
Tough subject. Everything you described has happened in marriages without autism. I’m a little leery of applying labels - we seem to do that very quickly in this day and age, followed by a prescription drug. While I’m sympathetic, I don’t know there’s a lot we can do about it. Ideally, We should always be kind and supportive when dealing with strangers and the people we come across. When it comes to choosing a partner to settle down with, I would advise getting to know them a little better and not rush into anything so you have a better idea of what you’re committing to.
Comments
Unfortunately, overly aggressive student loan programs have contributed to the expense. Ready access to these loan proceeds at the student level have let the universities charge unfettered tuition and fees. In a round about way, individual saving programs, like the 529s , will create a more discerning consumer and help keep universities in check. Assuming they are widely adopted and the student loan programs are reigned in.
Post: Is using a 529 plan a good strategy? Heck, is college worth the expense?
Link to comment from July 31, 2025
This is a tough one. In a perfect world, where resources such as time and money are unlimited, I think most kind hearted people would do everything they could for their parents, regardless of relationship. But we don’t live in that world. I didn’t have a father growing up, so was raised by mother. She’s a very sweet lady, but was neglectful and willful. I say this with no joy or judgement, but rather as a father who has gone through almost the full lifecycle of raising my own children. I raised them the way I would have liked to have been brought up. I didn’t let my hardscrabble childhood define me so much as drive me. It’s worked out fairly well. Getting myself educated and having a career meant moving away from the east side of Buffalo. So, I have siblings there who had the benefit of my mother’s help in raising their kids as de facto nanny. Again, no judgement, But I made sure my children were provided for and looked after properly. As we know, proper childcare, on top of saving for college, is a heavy lift. Theres more layers to this, but the long and short is I’ll be looking at my younger sister to step up after the many many years of having monopolized my mothers’ generous help in order for her to avoid childcare expenses during multiple divorces. My mother has dementia and will need adequate care as she’s getting worse. She remarried 5 years ago and her husband is shocked at this turn of events ( newsflash - health problems happen after age 70) Yes, we’ve done well financially, but by the same token I do not see the logic in sacrificing everything my wife and I have worked for in order to have a fancier nursing home. I’ll be letting my sister and my mothers husband take care of it.
Post: Family Dynamics, Part 3: What Do Adult Children Owe Their Aging Parents?
Link to comment from July 29, 2025
Mike, before trying an IronMan you should check that you didn’t damage your heart when you lost a lot of muscle.
Post: The Comeback
Link to comment from April 9, 2025
Context matters in these situations. If you have a long time before you need the funds, it might be worth considering. However, you earmarked these funds as ‘emergency’ for a reason. What’s changed other than events that you have no control over?
Post: Safety Net or Gambling Chip? Wrestling with Wealth and Wisdom”
Link to comment from April 8, 2025
With the market doing so well these past few years since Covid, we were really ‘ahead of the game’ in a good way. Recognizing that and recognizing the geo political volatility going on (the Ukraine war, the assassination attempts on candidate Trump), I felt we needed to lock in some gains and see where things were headed. We moved about 70% of our 401k’s into some conservative, capital preservation funds back in January. We kept our Roth’s, HSA and IRA’s in the market. I also moved my son’s 529 into the equivalent capital preservation. It turned out he was appointed to the Naval Academy, so we wouldn’t be drawing heavily from it for college expenses. But, we’re still moving the annual Roth IRA amount for him from that account. At his young age, it all goes into the market. The rest will be there after he graduates. I’m grateful it’s not being impacted. I wish I could say that I foresaw what’s currently happening, but it was just a feeling. I thought we might be due for a mild recession (the law of gravity , what goes up, must come down at some point). What motivated me more were the financial goals we hit. When you’ve won the game, stop playing….
Post: Tariffs and our retirement assets
Link to comment from April 5, 2025
There are many, but I’d say the first time we took our kids to Hawaii and walked out to a beautiful sunrise our first morning there with them - seeing a place like Hawaii through their young eyes was just magical. The surf, sun, gentle breeze and their energetic, happy voices.
Post: Hitting Repeat
Link to comment from April 4, 2025
Thank you Jonathan. I will continue to refer these four things as time goes by. As my last Saturday comment to your last Saturday article, I leave you with this Stephen King Quote, who I feel captures my feelings best -“The most important things are the hardest things to say. They are things you get ashamed of, because words make them smaller. When they were in your head they were limitless; but when they come out they seem to be no bigger than normal things. But that's not all. The most important things lie too close to wherever your secret heart is buried; they are clues that could guide your enemies to a prize they would love to steal. It's hard and painful for you to talk about these things ... and then people just look at you strangely. They haven't understood what you've said at all, or why you almost cried while you were saying it"
Post: Four Thoughts
Link to comment from March 1, 2025
Here’s mine -
Post: My Mistakes by Jonathan Clements
Link to comment from February 21, 2025
As I’m on the other side of 50, with my wife and I closing in on retirement, I have the perspective that a robust before and after tax portfolio brings. I have Jonathan and everyone here to partly thank for that. it wasn’t easy. Like some others, I grew up in a hardscrabble existence. We had no money for anything. What has stayed with me is the stress of a job loss that would spell doom in the form of being evicted and starting at yet another new school. After college, I had a Masters degree, but $36K in student loans and no financial savvy at that point. The good news was I was a tech guy entering the job market at the beginning of the 90s tech boom. I also had a subscription to the WSJ and the ‘Getting Going’ column filled with Jonathan’s practical writing. The loans would soon be retired. Budgeting , saving and investing came through trial and error, but we got there. The things that have stayed with me were the financial stress from my early teen years - experiencing not having any money and not knowing where the next job is coming for your family is incredibly stressful. The other guiding principal that stayed with me is around personal expenditure - I don’t mind spending money that has been budgeted to be spent, but I want something for my money - don’t waste it, get what you paid for. The rest of my principals came from Jonathan - understanding the value of index funds, the ‘tipping point’ that happens from regular investing and understanding that an ‘average working person’ can become wealthy/comfortable via regular budgeting, saving and investing. In other words, quit hoping to win the lottery - there’s no magic to it. Believe it or not, sometimes people need to actually be told this. Thank you for the impact you’ve had on my life and my kids’ lives Jonathan!
Post: Mind Over Money
Link to comment from February 2, 2025
Tough subject. Everything you described has happened in marriages without autism. I’m a little leery of applying labels - we seem to do that very quickly in this day and age, followed by a prescription drug. While I’m sympathetic, I don’t know there’s a lot we can do about it. Ideally, We should always be kind and supportive when dealing with strangers and the people we come across. When it comes to choosing a partner to settle down with, I would advise getting to know them a little better and not rush into anything so you have a better idea of what you’re committing to.
Post: Adult Autism
Link to comment from October 30, 2024