Great article and great for everyone to think about both ways, you living alone or your spouse. I didn't really pay attention to these issues, but now at 65 I've got aggressive prostate cancer that has spread to my lymph nodes and my spine. So I've been thinking a lot about how to get my wife ready to make all decisions on her own. She is very intelligent and I have no doubt can figure most things out, but I've done all the investing and she has shown no interest. She great with the bills and budgets but I worry she hasn't a clue how to not get swindled by the sharks in the investment world. for that reason I've kept a younger advisor who I trust but I didn't really need. Hopefully it will work out.
I was booted out when the my boss retired and the CEO told me I had too many rough edges to take his job whatever that means. I did get a nice severance package. So, I decided to take a year off. Made absolutely no commitments to do or go anywhere I didn't want to do or go. The year flew by. I did lots of projects around the house at my slow pace. The second year I started looking for something productive to do and started sub teaching (babysitting) at a private school. Loved it. Found an old guy coffee group. Read lots of books and went on several big trips out west. Now I just found out I have aggressive prostate cancer. Bummer. Glad I didn't plan too far ahead. I have a great wife who still works but may have to take time off to nurse me. The moral of the story is don't get to deed in the weeds planning every detail of retirement, cause life might throw you a curve ball. Good luck! and Enjoy the time you have!
Thanks Dick you just answered my question of why so many folks are moving to my neighborhood, upstate SC. My property tax is approximately 6K a year for 4 acres and a 4K sq house. I don't begrudge folks moving but they are destroying the very thing they are trying to find. Our infrastructure was not built to accommodate the thousands of new houses going up on former farms and fields and clear cut forests. Traffic has become a nightmare. The houses they are buying are cheaply built, real real cheap.
Because as an employment lawyer for 35 years, I can attest most, not all, employers kick out older employees the moment they can, for lots of reasons, but age discrimination is real.
My dream job was to be a small town lawyer. Think To Kill a Mockingbird. Atticus and Perry Mason were my role models. After law school my job in a father and son firm (not my father) disappeared in a flash after the father had to stop working and the son lawyer ran for a judge position. My father strongly advised me to work for a large firm to "learn how to be a lawyer". Long story short, I did learn how, but never loved being a lawyer for corporations as clients. But it paid the bills and small towns that you could build a good practice are hard to come by. 35 years later, I try not to fantasize about the "what ifs"....and enjoy the here and now. P.S. My only other dream was to be a Navy Aviator and fly off a carrier. Got close to joining but was accepted to a good law school and everyone pushed me in that direction. I still want to catapult off the deck in a jet!
My mom says they used a chamber pot. Didn't have indoor plumbing till high school. I think about that when I get up in the middle of the night especially when cold and wet outside....we are spoiled.
I'm the sucker who keeps going back to a jilted lover. I've had several nightmares with advisers, one big one is never use a friend as an advisor. My sole reason for using one is to keep me from making stupid mistakes or emotional mistakes. I don't fully trust my judgment . Right now I have a young guy who seems to be very smart, doesn't churn my account, but his communication is almost zero unless I initiate it. He's got till the end of this year for his 3 year probation, then I will decide once whether or not to go it alone. The hang up is my wife she has no interest in investing at all and would have to have someone when I pass. So I'm trying to find that someone now.
Comments
Great article and great for everyone to think about both ways, you living alone or your spouse. I didn't really pay attention to these issues, but now at 65 I've got aggressive prostate cancer that has spread to my lymph nodes and my spine. So I've been thinking a lot about how to get my wife ready to make all decisions on her own. She is very intelligent and I have no doubt can figure most things out, but I've done all the investing and she has shown no interest. She great with the bills and budgets but I worry she hasn't a clue how to not get swindled by the sharks in the investment world. for that reason I've kept a younger advisor who I trust but I didn't really need. Hopefully it will work out.
Post: Going it Alone by Dennis Friedman
Link to comment from June 21, 2025
I was booted out when the my boss retired and the CEO told me I had too many rough edges to take his job whatever that means. I did get a nice severance package. So, I decided to take a year off. Made absolutely no commitments to do or go anywhere I didn't want to do or go. The year flew by. I did lots of projects around the house at my slow pace. The second year I started looking for something productive to do and started sub teaching (babysitting) at a private school. Loved it. Found an old guy coffee group. Read lots of books and went on several big trips out west. Now I just found out I have aggressive prostate cancer. Bummer. Glad I didn't plan too far ahead. I have a great wife who still works but may have to take time off to nurse me. The moral of the story is don't get to deed in the weeds planning every detail of retirement, cause life might throw you a curve ball. Good luck! and Enjoy the time you have!
Post: When the Spreadsheet Gets Real
Link to comment from June 11, 2025
Thanks Dick you just answered my question of why so many folks are moving to my neighborhood, upstate SC. My property tax is approximately 6K a year for 4 acres and a 4K sq house. I don't begrudge folks moving but they are destroying the very thing they are trying to find. Our infrastructure was not built to accommodate the thousands of new houses going up on former farms and fields and clear cut forests. Traffic has become a nightmare. The houses they are buying are cheaply built, real real cheap.
Post: When relocation in retirement is not an option, not what you really want. By Dick Quinn
Link to comment from June 10, 2025
Because as an employment lawyer for 35 years, I can attest most, not all, employers kick out older employees the moment they can, for lots of reasons, but age discrimination is real.
Post: Talking Trillions by Jonathan Clements
Link to comment from June 9, 2025
Or 3. we are kicked out for the new younger model....and no one will hire an old guy with tons of experience .
Post: Talking Trillions by Jonathan Clements
Link to comment from June 9, 2025
that is very inspiring ! so happy for you and that is not sarcasm :)...
Post: Dreams I Had by Jonathan Clements
Link to comment from June 8, 2025
My dream job was to be a small town lawyer. Think To Kill a Mockingbird. Atticus and Perry Mason were my role models. After law school my job in a father and son firm (not my father) disappeared in a flash after the father had to stop working and the son lawyer ran for a judge position. My father strongly advised me to work for a large firm to "learn how to be a lawyer". Long story short, I did learn how, but never loved being a lawyer for corporations as clients. But it paid the bills and small towns that you could build a good practice are hard to come by. 35 years later, I try not to fantasize about the "what ifs"....and enjoy the here and now. P.S. My only other dream was to be a Navy Aviator and fly off a carrier. Got close to joining but was accepted to a good law school and everyone pushed me in that direction. I still want to catapult off the deck in a jet!
Post: Dreams I Had by Jonathan Clements
Link to comment from June 7, 2025
My mom says they used a chamber pot. Didn't have indoor plumbing till high school. I think about that when I get up in the middle of the night especially when cold and wet outside....we are spoiled.
Post: Can’t Figure Out This Darned Insomnia
Link to comment from May 17, 2025
I'm the sucker who keeps going back to a jilted lover. I've had several nightmares with advisers, one big one is never use a friend as an advisor. My sole reason for using one is to keep me from making stupid mistakes or emotional mistakes. I don't fully trust my judgment . Right now I have a young guy who seems to be very smart, doesn't churn my account, but his communication is almost zero unless I initiate it. He's got till the end of this year for his 3 year probation, then I will decide once whether or not to go it alone. The hang up is my wife she has no interest in investing at all and would have to have someone when I pass. So I'm trying to find that someone now.
Post: Financial Advisor – NEVER AGAIN
Link to comment from May 10, 2025
I am trying hard to control my "right" to be right. I repeat "grace" "grace" a lot especially when driving.
Post: The Wrong-Sided Man
Link to comment from May 10, 2025