AUTHOR: Rachna Condos on 1/12/2026 FIRST: Mike Xavier on 1/12 | RECENT: Andy Morrison on 1/27
Comments
Dana, we experienced something similar with our first and 2nd homes (almost the same year of purchase as well), except that we sold our first home for exactly what we paid for it and had been underwater for the 8 years (4 more than the original plan) we owned it. The 2nd home, the one we raised our kids in and still own has more than tripled in value. Of course we have done lots of improvements that we wanted to and ultimately we have a relationship with our home-comfort, memories, a solid sense of security-and it has been a forced savings that has allowed us to build a certain amount of wealth which we can touch if needed. I see the memes about moving every 2 years and pocketing the increase in value tax free but real estate (like all investments) is volatile and if you're counting on it always going up, there will sometimes be disappointment. But if you are purchasing a home for reasons other than "just" investment" there is nothing like a place of ones own.
This is a very relevant & timely conversation because both my kids are Gen Z (27 & 29) although my daughter is on the cusp as the youngest Millenial or the oldest Gen Z'er. And both just purchased their own home in the last month, in different states-California & North Carolina. Both did it differently and we helped some (which I am finding is the norm among their peer group). Both are college educated and make a decent salary but it's not tech professional level by any means. My daughter is married so that makes it a bit easier to buy a home but my son is single so I am going to focus this post on his journey to home ownership. My son graduated from college in 3 years (saving us the cost of the 4th year) and got a job within 30 miles of our house. He lived at home and saved a huge percentage of his paycheck, completed an MBA (which we paid for), and got a 2nd job in the last year to help him cobble together the funds to buy a house He also fully funded his Roth IRA and been contributing to his 401k through work with no match. The way in which we helped was that he lived here rent free and contributed funds when he needed to buy a car, and taught him about investing from an early age-putting money into a Roth for him the minute had his first part time job. Many of his friends seem to care about investing as well but they are more interested in crypto than traditional investing. The other way that we helped is that when my parents passed away there was a small IRA that I disclaimed and had it go to the kids. That helped with the down payment but the majority of the down payment came from his brokerage account and his Roth contributions that he had been making over the 7 years he lived at home. The truth is that he had to be willing to sacrifice his independence and live with his annoying parental unit:) in order to afford a home at 27. Most of his friends weren't willing to do that. All of his friends moved out into their own apartment and we all experienced ribbing and judgement from our respective peer groups about him living at home after the 1st year. There was this underlying belief that moving out is the panacea and living at home breeds unproductive video playing unable to launch human beings and we were in the wrong for allowing him to live at home rent free. My husband and I often disagreed on this issue. He was of the belief that he should pay rent (which he eventually did) and we would save all that rent and give it back to him in one big check when he moved out. I held firm to the idea that this is his home and home should always be available thus he is welcome to be here for as long as he likes, as long as he is doing all the responsible things. However, a couple of years ago I agreed that he should pay rent and his car insurance which he did willingly and without prodding. I will say that there is a level of independence that can only happen when living on your own so I am not discounting the value of that. However, it would have been impossible for him to purchase a home with 20% down if he had not lived at home for all these years. An interesting financial development occurred while he was looking for a house to buy. Interviews with JL Collins and Ramit Sethi stressed the importance of not buying a house, that the return was much better in the market and that home ownership was a bad idea that society had foisted upon us. I am paraphrasing their viewpoints. We are big believers in the value of home ownership and prefer not to rent whenever possible but the homes he was seeing in the $475k range were not great (understatement), and new builds lot size was non-existent so I told him what these financial professionals were saying that home ownership wasn't a great idea so maybe he should consider renting for a period of time.. No sooner had he begun to accept that maybe he should rent, David Bach went on the podcast circuit to say "wealth comes from forced savings that home ownership provides and you can't live inside your mutual fund" Having fully confused the young man he was fortunate to find a house he could afford and was very well maintained for being 20 years old and as of 3 weeks ago he has fully moved out with his dog in tow!
Congratulations on this exciting new development. I'm sure it gives you peace of mind to know that (if needed), your daughter would have a place to call her own as she figures out her life. I don't know if you looked into the option of a portion of your pension going to her when you pass away. It means less money now but the security of her having a stable income for her lifetime is huge. If she doesn't need it thats the best-but if she does it will be a godsend and while we can't control much when it comes to adult children, knowing that they will have a regular income without complexity can make us rest easier if we are concerned for their future.
Hello, Based on my name you may not know that I am female but I am:) I came upon the Humble Dollar site just as Jonathan announced his diagnosis and prognosis so I am a bit of a newbie. However, I read Jonathan for years as I have been a WSJ subscriber for 30+ years and was very saddened to hear of his illness and ultimate demise. I share all this to say that I have been a regular reader for the last 18 months and posted a few responses. I enjoy the regular contributors (Mark & Robert) and a host of others and still make Humble Dollar a regular stop on an almost daily basis. I enjoy when there is some discussion and debate but I will tell you that I know many women who are quick to take offense at disagreement. I actually find that off-putting because the key to a healthy society is the ability to flesh out ideas and make them better. Having said that not everything needs to be contentious or disagreed upon but having a diverse set of experiences and opinions is a good thing. I will say that I am guilty of "lurking', reading posts and not commenting however there was a moment when I felt compelled to post an it was when Robert Quinn ( who I don't know and sometimes disagree with) was being attacked, mostly by a few posters who may have been women. It felt very "mean girl" (if you've seen the movie or read the book you get extra points) and I cannot abide anyone being singled out and attacked! Whether I agreed or disagreed with his point of view was immaterial, it was the right thing to do to comment on the treatment he was receiving as it felt antithetical to Humble Dollar. I still come regularly not just for the financial information but the personal anecdotes that make the financial information even more salient. Please don't think that you have in some way turned off the females in the group because you have not, perhaps you have turned off those that were posting before. I don't write posts because I don't know that I have something to say that hasn't been said but perhaps I will put something out in the future so you know that the "fairer sex" is still out there and engaged.
Thanks Greg, we will see how it goes. I am very wary of AUM advisors and neither one of them is overly interested in finances yet I know when we pass away, there will be a substantial sum that they will need to know how to manage. It was easy for us because neither of us had much to begin with when we got married and we were both savers:)
Interesting topic. My daughter recently got married and is the primary breadwinner as her new husband is starting Physician Assistant school at Duke. During the bridal shower they played the newlywed game and it was quite enlightening when the question of "who spends more" was raised, they both pointed to each other but eventually it was agreed that my daughter spent more.However, upon further discussion what emerged was that she was likely to spend on small things regularly and often household items whereas his spending was not as often but much larger dollar amounts and usually unrelated to the home. For Christmas we gifted our daughter and our brand new son-in-law a very practical and strategic gift-$3000 towards a fee only financial planner. The purpose of the gift was so that they could work on their financial goals, desires, and habits together and make money something they could easily talk about rather than it coming up when it became an issue. We did not want to interfere or have them perceive us as interfering so we wrote them a nice letter explaining the goal of the gift and that we would always be there to support and answer questions but wanted them to have a professional that was guiding them around money matters. We gave them the hello nectarine site where they could pick from any planner they wanted and I had also culled through and given them 6 planners that I thought might work well for them. They were pleased although in private they said, "my wise decision about money would to not spend $3000 on a financial planner”😉 What was a bit frustrating and eye-opening was the response I got when I originally posted on a Retirement Facebook Page asking for recommendations of fee only planners. The recommendations were few but the questioning of my parenting was plenty! I had posted anonymously and soon took it down as it was causing me quite a bit of frustration and making me second-guess myself, our relationship and my intentions! Luckily it was met with gratitude from the recipients, and our hope is that as they continue to make more money they will have a better understanding of how to manage it and ultimately amass wealth.
Jackie, that is wonderful to hear that Fidelity was so helpful. We have our HSAs at Fidelity but don't really want to add them to the mix because the majority of our brokerage accounts are at Schwab and Vanguard and it seem simpler to stay with one of them. I will say that the comments here are very heavily in favor of Fidelity so they are obviously doing a great job!
Comments
Dana, we experienced something similar with our first and 2nd homes (almost the same year of purchase as well), except that we sold our first home for exactly what we paid for it and had been underwater for the 8 years (4 more than the original plan) we owned it. The 2nd home, the one we raised our kids in and still own has more than tripled in value. Of course we have done lots of improvements that we wanted to and ultimately we have a relationship with our home-comfort, memories, a solid sense of security-and it has been a forced savings that has allowed us to build a certain amount of wealth which we can touch if needed. I see the memes about moving every 2 years and pocketing the increase in value tax free but real estate (like all investments) is volatile and if you're counting on it always going up, there will sometimes be disappointment. But if you are purchasing a home for reasons other than "just" investment" there is nothing like a place of ones own.
Post: The Home Ownership Gamble
Link to comment from April 7, 2026
This is a very relevant & timely conversation because both my kids are Gen Z (27 & 29) although my daughter is on the cusp as the youngest Millenial or the oldest Gen Z'er. And both just purchased their own home in the last month, in different states-California & North Carolina. Both did it differently and we helped some (which I am finding is the norm among their peer group). Both are college educated and make a decent salary but it's not tech professional level by any means. My daughter is married so that makes it a bit easier to buy a home but my son is single so I am going to focus this post on his journey to home ownership. My son graduated from college in 3 years (saving us the cost of the 4th year) and got a job within 30 miles of our house. He lived at home and saved a huge percentage of his paycheck, completed an MBA (which we paid for), and got a 2nd job in the last year to help him cobble together the funds to buy a house He also fully funded his Roth IRA and been contributing to his 401k through work with no match. The way in which we helped was that he lived here rent free and contributed funds when he needed to buy a car, and taught him about investing from an early age-putting money into a Roth for him the minute had his first part time job. Many of his friends seem to care about investing as well but they are more interested in crypto than traditional investing. The other way that we helped is that when my parents passed away there was a small IRA that I disclaimed and had it go to the kids. That helped with the down payment but the majority of the down payment came from his brokerage account and his Roth contributions that he had been making over the 7 years he lived at home. The truth is that he had to be willing to sacrifice his independence and live with his annoying parental unit:) in order to afford a home at 27. Most of his friends weren't willing to do that. All of his friends moved out into their own apartment and we all experienced ribbing and judgement from our respective peer groups about him living at home after the 1st year. There was this underlying belief that moving out is the panacea and living at home breeds unproductive video playing unable to launch human beings and we were in the wrong for allowing him to live at home rent free. My husband and I often disagreed on this issue. He was of the belief that he should pay rent (which he eventually did) and we would save all that rent and give it back to him in one big check when he moved out. I held firm to the idea that this is his home and home should always be available thus he is welcome to be here for as long as he likes, as long as he is doing all the responsible things. However, a couple of years ago I agreed that he should pay rent and his car insurance which he did willingly and without prodding. I will say that there is a level of independence that can only happen when living on your own so I am not discounting the value of that. However, it would have been impossible for him to purchase a home with 20% down if he had not lived at home for all these years. An interesting financial development occurred while he was looking for a house to buy. Interviews with JL Collins and Ramit Sethi stressed the importance of not buying a house, that the return was much better in the market and that home ownership was a bad idea that society had foisted upon us. I am paraphrasing their viewpoints. We are big believers in the value of home ownership and prefer not to rent whenever possible but the homes he was seeing in the $475k range were not great (understatement), and new builds lot size was non-existent so I told him what these financial professionals were saying that home ownership wasn't a great idea so maybe he should consider renting for a period of time.. No sooner had he begun to accept that maybe he should rent, David Bach went on the podcast circuit to say "wealth comes from forced savings that home ownership provides and you can't live inside your mutual fund" Having fully confused the young man he was fortunate to find a house he could afford and was very well maintained for being 20 years old and as of 3 weeks ago he has fully moved out with his dog in tow!
Post: Giving Up on Owning a Home
Link to comment from April 1, 2026
Congratulations on this exciting new development. I'm sure it gives you peace of mind to know that (if needed), your daughter would have a place to call her own as she figures out her life. I don't know if you looked into the option of a portion of your pension going to her when you pass away. It means less money now but the security of her having a stable income for her lifetime is huge. If she doesn't need it thats the best-but if she does it will be a godsend and while we can't control much when it comes to adult children, knowing that they will have a regular income without complexity can make us rest easier if we are concerned for their future.
Post: A Big Little Move (by Dana/DrLefty)
Link to comment from April 1, 2026
Hello, Based on my name you may not know that I am female but I am:) I came upon the Humble Dollar site just as Jonathan announced his diagnosis and prognosis so I am a bit of a newbie. However, I read Jonathan for years as I have been a WSJ subscriber for 30+ years and was very saddened to hear of his illness and ultimate demise. I share all this to say that I have been a regular reader for the last 18 months and posted a few responses. I enjoy the regular contributors (Mark & Robert) and a host of others and still make Humble Dollar a regular stop on an almost daily basis. I enjoy when there is some discussion and debate but I will tell you that I know many women who are quick to take offense at disagreement. I actually find that off-putting because the key to a healthy society is the ability to flesh out ideas and make them better. Having said that not everything needs to be contentious or disagreed upon but having a diverse set of experiences and opinions is a good thing. I will say that I am guilty of "lurking', reading posts and not commenting however there was a moment when I felt compelled to post an it was when Robert Quinn ( who I don't know and sometimes disagree with) was being attacked, mostly by a few posters who may have been women. It felt very "mean girl" (if you've seen the movie or read the book you get extra points) and I cannot abide anyone being singled out and attacked! Whether I agreed or disagreed with his point of view was immaterial, it was the right thing to do to comment on the treatment he was receiving as it felt antithetical to Humble Dollar. I still come regularly not just for the financial information but the personal anecdotes that make the financial information even more salient. Please don't think that you have in some way turned off the females in the group because you have not, perhaps you have turned off those that were posting before. I don't write posts because I don't know that I have something to say that hasn't been said but perhaps I will put something out in the future so you know that the "fairer sex" is still out there and engaged.
Post: Where are the ladies?
Link to comment from March 26, 2026
Thanks Greg, we will see how it goes. I am very wary of AUM advisors and neither one of them is overly interested in finances yet I know when we pass away, there will be a substantial sum that they will need to know how to manage. It was easy for us because neither of us had much to begin with when we got married and we were both savers:)
Post: Are you and your spouse synchronized?
Link to comment from January 20, 2026
Interesting topic. My daughter recently got married and is the primary breadwinner as her new husband is starting Physician Assistant school at Duke. During the bridal shower they played the newlywed game and it was quite enlightening when the question of "who spends more" was raised, they both pointed to each other but eventually it was agreed that my daughter spent more.However, upon further discussion what emerged was that she was likely to spend on small things regularly and often household items whereas his spending was not as often but much larger dollar amounts and usually unrelated to the home. For Christmas we gifted our daughter and our brand new son-in-law a very practical and strategic gift-$3000 towards a fee only financial planner. The purpose of the gift was so that they could work on their financial goals, desires, and habits together and make money something they could easily talk about rather than it coming up when it became an issue. We did not want to interfere or have them perceive us as interfering so we wrote them a nice letter explaining the goal of the gift and that we would always be there to support and answer questions but wanted them to have a professional that was guiding them around money matters. We gave them the hello nectarine site where they could pick from any planner they wanted and I had also culled through and given them 6 planners that I thought might work well for them. They were pleased although in private they said, "my wise decision about money would to not spend $3000 on a financial planner”😉 What was a bit frustrating and eye-opening was the response I got when I originally posted on a Retirement Facebook Page asking for recommendations of fee only planners. The recommendations were few but the questioning of my parenting was plenty! I had posted anonymously and soon took it down as it was causing me quite a bit of frustration and making me second-guess myself, our relationship and my intentions! Luckily it was met with gratitude from the recipients, and our hope is that as they continue to make more money they will have a better understanding of how to manage it and ultimately amass wealth.
Post: Are you and your spouse synchronized?
Link to comment from January 19, 2026
Jackie, that is wonderful to hear that Fidelity was so helpful. We have our HSAs at Fidelity but don't really want to add them to the mix because the majority of our brokerage accounts are at Schwab and Vanguard and it seem simpler to stay with one of them. I will say that the comments here are very heavily in favor of Fidelity so they are obviously doing a great job!
Post: Schwab or Vanguard?
Link to comment from January 13, 2026
Good to know that you can purchase the Vanguard ETFs at Schwab.
Post: Schwab or Vanguard?
Link to comment from January 12, 2026
Thank you for the detailed response, it is quite helpful.
Post: Schwab or Vanguard?
Link to comment from January 12, 2026
I'm sorry to hear of the botched conversion. As we will be doing those over the next few years Vanguard's handling of your account does give me pause.
Post: Schwab or Vanguard?
Link to comment from January 12, 2026