This is very familiar. When both my kids started playing hockey as 3-5 year-olds, I had no idea what I was facing. Today, my 22 year-old still plays at the collegiate level, and my other son (24), quit at 16. The travel teams, hockey academies, Canadian apartments rented, hotels, food, flights, and equipment costs have been insane. I lost count for sure, but it's likely in the 250K-300K range at this point. At this point, house league and depositing the max gift from each parent to each child in an S&P fund (VOO, SPY), and reinvesting the dividends probably would have been the better play financially. However, the life my son has lived, the people he's met, the lessons he's learned, and his abilitiy to cope with real challenges is likely more than worth every penny.
We've greatly benefitted from the following strategy:
Costco Visa - gas and Costco visits
Alaska Airlines - both of us have business and personal cards and the signup bonuses were extremely impactful. We use these cards to pay about 3/4 of all our household and business bills.
IHG Chase - I got the business and personal cards with very high credit limits, and the signup bonuses were incredible. We get 4 nights for 3 using points, and haven't paid for a hotel room in a long time. I use these cards for high-dollar items and when buying equipment for customer purchase from my distributor. The points add up fast.
Chase Sapphire Preferred - both of us got these cards under a single account with great sign-up bonuses. We use this for all our regular grocery and restaurant spending.
It's been pretty incredible as Alaska is part of the OneWorld system and we travel to Asia quite a bit. We get free checked bags, and get upgraded to first class on most domestic flights. There are lots of YouTubers out there that go over all the strategies. We picked one strategy that worked for our lifestyle and it's been great. We did Amex Platinum for a year and it wasn't that great, so we nixed it.
This is a great topic. As I have gotten older I am much less frugal. I buy more expensive plane tickets in higher quantity. I take an Uber instead of a smelly, crowded, late bus. I used to get pissed that my sandwich was $20 and would buy all the meats myself to build it, and now I don't care. I grab my sandwich and sit in my chair at Harborview Park. It's amazing. However, I definitely am trying to rid myself of "stuff." In my case, it's mostly electronic stuff, kid stuff, and older furniture. I have 30 year-old couch I haven't used in ages as well as my parents' dining room table from their wedding in 1966, along with a credenza full of china. It's all never been touched. I have guitars I don't use anymore, old laptops just stacking up, old monitors that are well past their primes. I have a ton of chipped plates that I can't seem to toss because they are Crate and Barrel and cost me a fortune when I purchased them 20 years ago. The moral of the story I guess is that I want to spend more money, but on experiences and making my life easier. I want to get rid of things that just take of space and serve no function. It was a good article. Thanks for taking the time to write it.
I would imagine I am making all kinds of mistakes with this right now. My son was out of the house in an apartment for almost four years, and I moved him back in to save up money for a house. He works full time and has been with the same girl for six years. It was a huge mistake and I even told him it was. Now I have to have the convo with him that he needs to move out by next March. The other son plays college ice hockey in Canada and works during the summers. I have absolutely no idea what's going to happen there. Both kids are on the cell phone plan, on my car insurance (still), and we pay a bunch of other expenses for them. I honestly couldn't tell you how I get here. Are they good kids? Yeah, of course. Would they mature more quickly and become men if my wife and I didn't cover all these expenses? Yes. Is there value in that? I "think so," but who the heck knows. I am just super frustrated to have had a nice quiet empty nest turn into a cacophony of videos blasting on overdriven mobile phone speakers, dirty glasses left in the sink, and cat litter remnants left all over the kitchen by a cat that wasn't really welcome. Ugh. This post couldn't have been more timely.
I don't know the percentage of people who are NOT retired here (I am 52 and still run my business), but I think with advisors YMMV, and paying a percentage of assets makes absolutely no sense to me. I'd rather take that money each year and do bucket list trips. I keep a portfolio of 30 dividend growth stocks, DRIP those, and some cash to invest as new opportunities arise. I don't think it's all that hard. If a company has been increasing dividends for over 50 years, it seems like a good bet they will be around for a while and doing the same thing. Yes, companies fall off the list, but a couple of times a year I just check-in and ensure my investment thesis still holds. Last I checked, people will be brushing their teeth, using deodorant, blowing their noses, and wiping their butts for the foreseeable future. :) I know a lot of people in the comments mentioned the YouTube guys. Toby Mathis and Ari Taublieb are pretty good as well. Good luck all.
This discussion is making my head hurt and making me want to just take the 10% penalty on all my IRA and 401K money right now, dump it into my dividend growth portfolio and just pay the 15-20% on the dividends above 85K (married) and just move on with my life. lol
The FIRE stuff is nonsense and just a way to click-bait people on various platforms to make money. There are tons and tons of people out there retiring in their late 40s/early 50s with well-diversified savings/investments just living their lives. They aren't trying to show off or make passive income from their accomplishments. The people at HD are just doing it for fun and out of a sense of community interest.
A spreadsheet just helps you see where the money is going, can go, and how long it might last given certain variables. I have a "this is what your life costs per day" sheet and it allows me to stay calm when the waters get choppy. It doesn't control my spending, but if there's is a 300-500 dollar surplus per day on top of overestimated buckets of spending, I think it's pretty safe to pay a buddy's green fees, buy beers for the boys, or take the extra road trip. RQ has obviously done this without a spreadsheet, but some of us are data nerds and I find this approach feeds the beast.
Many of the classic dividend growth stocks / dividend kings will provide 2-3% yields (with MO providing over 6%), and are experiencing capital appreciation as well, which is why the current yields are low. Think about it, the current yield is the current cash dividend/current price. If you buy at $100/share, and the current yield is 1%, then if both the share price and dividend payments IN DOLLARS AND CENTS go up 10%, the current yield on any given day is 1%. When you come back 7 years later and look at the share price and it's doubled, and your dividend has doubled, you are richer. Getting caught up in current yield is a fool's game. If Company XYZ increases their dividend payments by 10%, you got a 10% raise. People claw and battle at their jobs to get 5% raises, yet there are companies out there massively growing their dividends every year. Since 2008, I've followed a dividend growth strategy and it's been awesome, so I never worry about valuations. I just keep reinvesting dividends. If stocks crash in the short term, I win because I buy more shares with those increased dollars. If Company XYZ has increased dividends through the worst world events since 1960-70, I'm confident they will continue to do so.
Comments
This is very familiar. When both my kids started playing hockey as 3-5 year-olds, I had no idea what I was facing. Today, my 22 year-old still plays at the collegiate level, and my other son (24), quit at 16. The travel teams, hockey academies, Canadian apartments rented, hotels, food, flights, and equipment costs have been insane. I lost count for sure, but it's likely in the 250K-300K range at this point. At this point, house league and depositing the max gift from each parent to each child in an S&P fund (VOO, SPY), and reinvesting the dividends probably would have been the better play financially. However, the life my son has lived, the people he's met, the lessons he's learned, and his abilitiy to cope with real challenges is likely more than worth every penny.
Post: Throw, hit or kick … it all add$ up
Link to comment from September 27, 2025
We've greatly benefitted from the following strategy:
- Costco Visa - gas and Costco visits
- Alaska Airlines - both of us have business and personal cards and the signup bonuses were extremely impactful. We use these cards to pay about 3/4 of all our household and business bills.
- IHG Chase - I got the business and personal cards with very high credit limits, and the signup bonuses were incredible. We get 4 nights for 3 using points, and haven't paid for a hotel room in a long time. I use these cards for high-dollar items and when buying equipment for customer purchase from my distributor. The points add up fast.
- Chase Sapphire Preferred - both of us got these cards under a single account with great sign-up bonuses. We use this for all our regular grocery and restaurant spending.
It's been pretty incredible as Alaska is part of the OneWorld system and we travel to Asia quite a bit. We get free checked bags, and get upgraded to first class on most domestic flights. There are lots of YouTubers out there that go over all the strategies. We picked one strategy that worked for our lifestyle and it's been great. We did Amex Platinum for a year and it wasn't that great, so we nixed it.Post: What is your credit card rewards strategy?
Link to comment from September 12, 2025
This is a great topic. As I have gotten older I am much less frugal. I buy more expensive plane tickets in higher quantity. I take an Uber instead of a smelly, crowded, late bus. I used to get pissed that my sandwich was $20 and would buy all the meats myself to build it, and now I don't care. I grab my sandwich and sit in my chair at Harborview Park. It's amazing. However, I definitely am trying to rid myself of "stuff." In my case, it's mostly electronic stuff, kid stuff, and older furniture. I have 30 year-old couch I haven't used in ages as well as my parents' dining room table from their wedding in 1966, along with a credenza full of china. It's all never been touched. I have guitars I don't use anymore, old laptops just stacking up, old monitors that are well past their primes. I have a ton of chipped plates that I can't seem to toss because they are Crate and Barrel and cost me a fortune when I purchased them 20 years ago. The moral of the story I guess is that I want to spend more money, but on experiences and making my life easier. I want to get rid of things that just take of space and serve no function. It was a good article. Thanks for taking the time to write it.
Post: Frugality, Minimalism, and Aligning Values
Link to comment from August 31, 2025
I would imagine I am making all kinds of mistakes with this right now. My son was out of the house in an apartment for almost four years, and I moved him back in to save up money for a house. He works full time and has been with the same girl for six years. It was a huge mistake and I even told him it was. Now I have to have the convo with him that he needs to move out by next March. The other son plays college ice hockey in Canada and works during the summers. I have absolutely no idea what's going to happen there. Both kids are on the cell phone plan, on my car insurance (still), and we pay a bunch of other expenses for them. I honestly couldn't tell you how I get here. Are they good kids? Yeah, of course. Would they mature more quickly and become men if my wife and I didn't cover all these expenses? Yes. Is there value in that? I "think so," but who the heck knows. I am just super frustrated to have had a nice quiet empty nest turn into a cacophony of videos blasting on overdriven mobile phone speakers, dirty glasses left in the sink, and cat litter remnants left all over the kitchen by a cat that wasn't really welcome. Ugh. This post couldn't have been more timely.
Post: Family Dynamics, Part 2: Supporting Adult Children
Link to comment from July 23, 2025
Read this: https://capitalismmagazine.com/2002/08/franciscos-money-speech/ That about says it.
Post: Could you be (justifiably) a source of envy by others? Are you wealthy?
Link to comment from July 20, 2025
I don't know the percentage of people who are NOT retired here (I am 52 and still run my business), but I think with advisors YMMV, and paying a percentage of assets makes absolutely no sense to me. I'd rather take that money each year and do bucket list trips. I keep a portfolio of 30 dividend growth stocks, DRIP those, and some cash to invest as new opportunities arise. I don't think it's all that hard. If a company has been increasing dividends for over 50 years, it seems like a good bet they will be around for a while and doing the same thing. Yes, companies fall off the list, but a couple of times a year I just check-in and ensure my investment thesis still holds. Last I checked, people will be brushing their teeth, using deodorant, blowing their noses, and wiping their butts for the foreseeable future. :) I know a lot of people in the comments mentioned the YouTube guys. Toby Mathis and Ari Taublieb are pretty good as well. Good luck all.
Post: Beyond fees, is using a financial advisor, advisable? If you do or don’t why?
Link to comment from July 13, 2025
This discussion is making my head hurt and making me want to just take the 10% penalty on all my IRA and 401K money right now, dump it into my dividend growth portfolio and just pay the 15-20% on the dividends above 85K (married) and just move on with my life. lol
Post: Securing Lower Taxes
Link to comment from July 11, 2025
The FIRE stuff is nonsense and just a way to click-bait people on various platforms to make money. There are tons and tons of people out there retiring in their late 40s/early 50s with well-diversified savings/investments just living their lives. They aren't trying to show off or make passive income from their accomplishments. The people at HD are just doing it for fun and out of a sense of community interest.
Post: Going too far with FIRE: The downside of being in the financial advice business – RDQ
Link to comment from June 2, 2025
A spreadsheet just helps you see where the money is going, can go, and how long it might last given certain variables. I have a "this is what your life costs per day" sheet and it allows me to stay calm when the waters get choppy. It doesn't control my spending, but if there's is a 300-500 dollar surplus per day on top of overestimated buckets of spending, I think it's pretty safe to pay a buddy's green fees, buy beers for the boys, or take the extra road trip. RQ has obviously done this without a spreadsheet, but some of us are data nerds and I find this approach feeds the beast.
Post: Is it possible to achieve financial well being without a plan or even a spreadsheet?
Link to comment from May 27, 2025
Many of the classic dividend growth stocks / dividend kings will provide 2-3% yields (with MO providing over 6%), and are experiencing capital appreciation as well, which is why the current yields are low. Think about it, the current yield is the current cash dividend/current price. If you buy at $100/share, and the current yield is 1%, then if both the share price and dividend payments IN DOLLARS AND CENTS go up 10%, the current yield on any given day is 1%. When you come back 7 years later and look at the share price and it's doubled, and your dividend has doubled, you are richer. Getting caught up in current yield is a fool's game. If Company XYZ increases their dividend payments by 10%, you got a 10% raise. People claw and battle at their jobs to get 5% raises, yet there are companies out there massively growing their dividends every year. Since 2008, I've followed a dividend growth strategy and it's been awesome, so I never worry about valuations. I just keep reinvesting dividends. If stocks crash in the short term, I win because I buy more shares with those increased dollars. If Company XYZ has increased dividends through the worst world events since 1960-70, I'm confident they will continue to do so.
Post: Ignore Valuations?
Link to comment from May 21, 2025