I do not think most 18 year old are can be expected to cover college costs. Personal expenses (clothing, gas, subscription fees, etc.) should be their responsibility in most cases. My wife and I covered both of our sons undergraduate costs. My older son went to a state school and received a 50% tuition scholarship. My younger son went to a private school and also received a very healthy scholarship. He finished his undergrad in 3 years-a big help. He then went on to Rutgers Law School on a full scholarship. My younger son often stops by with a friend of his. She received her undergrad & masters (Psychology/Counseling) from a private school in NJ. Financed all with public and private loans. For various reasons she was able to keep deferring payments until recently. Total cost is north of $100,000. Her stress level is through the roof. She doesn't know how she is going to pay the $1,000 + monthly loan costs. She is barely keeping her head above water as is. My son said one strategy she is considering is going on for her PH'd in that field ....taking out more loans to cover the cost. Apparently, as long as she is a full time student existing loan payments are deferred. Meanwhile, interest costs keeps growing and she'll need more loans to pay for the Ph'd. I asked him if he realized the craziness of her thought process. Thankfully, he has. He is strongly discouraging her from going that route.
My parents were woefully unprepared for retirement. My dad was a sheet metal worker and my mom worked in retail. They never really made much money. When it came time to retire they had a paid for house and social security. My mom did have a very small pension. It would have been a struggle for them but both passed away in their early 60's. One of the reasons I chose to work for the government was the fact they had a good pension and, in some cases, health benefits for retirees. We also had the option of participating in a 457b Deferred Compensation Plan. I researched my options and thought I should start investing in the stock market and starting contributing 2% of my salary in 1991. I increased the amount regularly until retiring in 2010. At that time, I rolled over my Deferred Comp to a Traditional IRA with Vanguard. In summary, seeing my parents struggle motivated me to explore better retirement options. I'm very glad I did.
Difficult to assess without actual numbers- size of portfolio, CCRC fees (current and projected), S.S. amount, etc. It seems you are being very conservative. You started your withdrawals at 76 instead of 70. That, in my mind, gave your portfolio 6 extra years to grow. In addition, you only withdrew 1% for 2 years. In reality, you have barely touched your portfolio at age 78. When you add in your S.S. & pension (non COLA'd if I remember from past posts) it seems 4% will work. I always thought 4% was a very conservative number. I know it is tough getting around the psychological barrier of tapping into your portfolio because I am in the same boat! Best of luck.
I am not a fan of USPS. I find their customer service is akin to the USSR circa 1970. My younger son recently spent 1 year living in St. Croix, USVI. I decided to send him a care package of junk food (candy, cookies,etc.) because things are so expensive there. The package took 29 days only to be returned to me. As per tracker it spent 15 days sitting in Jacksonville, Fl. I specifically marked it to be held at his local Post Office because he did not get home delivery of mail. Sure enough the tracker informed me it was
"out for delivery" the day it arrived in St. Croix. Then "addressee could not be located". Package was returned damaged. I foolishly went to my local P.O. to try to obtain some info. I remember the clerk telling me her mom was from St. Thomas, USVI. She the said," You know how they are down there" as she made a drinking motion with her hand. Kind of comical but sad.
Just a tiny correction if I may. State of NJ Pension has been frozen since 2011 - 14 years. I know because I retired in 2010. At that time, the COLA did not kick in for the first 2 years of retirement. Supposedly, once the pensions are funded at a certain level (80 % I think) the COLA will kick back in. Many think that level will never be reached.
We have a 2021 Subaru Crosstrek w/ 39,000 miles. Purchased it new. Funny you should mention that direct injection engine. At 20,000 miles and again at 37,000 miles all the dashboard warning lights lit up while I was driving. Had to bring it to the dealer for servicing. Turns out there was carbon build up on the valves and cylinder heads. Had to be cleaned and runs great after the cleaning. Subaru has even put out a service bulletin to address the issue. I was first told problem may be related to poor quality gasoline. We exclusively use a well rated gasoline. Second time I was told it may be because of short trips, lack of highway driving, low mileage, etc. We put approx. 8000 miles per year on both our cars. I have had 4 other cars (Mazda, Nissan, Honda and Chevy) driven the same way using the same type of gas. I have never had a problem with carbon build up on any of those cars. Some independent research and a conversation with my regular mechanic points to the direct injection engine. Buyer beware.
We pay property taxes again and again because they fund recurring expenses. The cost of police and fire protection, street lights, garbage removal, sewers, court systems, jails, road maintenance, schools, etc., doesn't end because we paid property taxes this year. They need to be paid this year, next year and in the future. If I buy a new television or washing machine I pay the sales tax once and that's it - until I need a new one.
We live in Passaic County, NJ, in a township with a very good elementary school sysytem and a fair secondary school system. My youngest graduated high school in 2017. I have no problem funding our local school systems via property taxes. If property taxes are waived for a certain group others have to pick up the slack. We all benefit by having educated citizens. Presumably, we all have utilized the public school systems either for ourselves, our kids or both. With limited exceptions, I feel we all should share the costs.
Thank you Mark. I was cleared to drive and have been doing so since early September. I have/will continue to use NJ Transit for adventures and more mundane things like some doctor's appointments, library, etc. I've been driving for 50 plus years so its nice to leave the driving to others. One weird thing I must note. Almost everyone I tell about my transit adventures seems to cringe at the idea of using public transport. I'm in your camp about loving local bus (and soon train) service. I wonder if that just an "American thing"?
Comments
I do not think most 18 year old are can be expected to cover college costs. Personal expenses (clothing, gas, subscription fees, etc.) should be their responsibility in most cases. My wife and I covered both of our sons undergraduate costs. My older son went to a state school and received a 50% tuition scholarship. My younger son went to a private school and also received a very healthy scholarship. He finished his undergrad in 3 years-a big help. He then went on to Rutgers Law School on a full scholarship. My younger son often stops by with a friend of his. She received her undergrad & masters (Psychology/Counseling) from a private school in NJ. Financed all with public and private loans. For various reasons she was able to keep deferring payments until recently. Total cost is north of $100,000. Her stress level is through the roof. She doesn't know how she is going to pay the $1,000 + monthly loan costs. She is barely keeping her head above water as is. My son said one strategy she is considering is going on for her PH'd in that field ....taking out more loans to cover the cost. Apparently, as long as she is a full time student existing loan payments are deferred. Meanwhile, interest costs keeps growing and she'll need more loans to pay for the Ph'd. I asked him if he realized the craziness of her thought process. Thankfully, he has. He is strongly discouraging her from going that route.
Post: Is there any point when a child needs financial help that you feel comfortable saying “not my problem?”
Link to comment from March 14, 2026
My parents were woefully unprepared for retirement. My dad was a sheet metal worker and my mom worked in retail. They never really made much money. When it came time to retire they had a paid for house and social security. My mom did have a very small pension. It would have been a struggle for them but both passed away in their early 60's. One of the reasons I chose to work for the government was the fact they had a good pension and, in some cases, health benefits for retirees. We also had the option of participating in a 457b Deferred Compensation Plan. I researched my options and thought I should start investing in the stock market and starting contributing 2% of my salary in 1991. I increased the amount regularly until retiring in 2010. At that time, I rolled over my Deferred Comp to a Traditional IRA with Vanguard. In summary, seeing my parents struggle motivated me to explore better retirement options. I'm very glad I did.
Post: How did you avoid being in the 39%?
Link to comment from March 4, 2026
E filed on Feb 1. Small refund going into my bank account on Feb. 11. Kudos to the understaffed IRS folks.
Post: 2025 Tax Return Time – Overview of Changes
Link to comment from February 9, 2026
Difficult to assess without actual numbers- size of portfolio, CCRC fees (current and projected), S.S. amount, etc. It seems you are being very conservative. You started your withdrawals at 76 instead of 70. That, in my mind, gave your portfolio 6 extra years to grow. In addition, you only withdrew 1% for 2 years. In reality, you have barely touched your portfolio at age 78. When you add in your S.S. & pension (non COLA'd if I remember from past posts) it seems 4% will work. I always thought 4% was a very conservative number. I know it is tough getting around the psychological barrier of tapping into your portfolio because I am in the same boat! Best of luck.
Post: Customizing the Safe Withdrawal Rate
Link to comment from January 8, 2026
I am not a fan of USPS. I find their customer service is akin to the USSR circa 1970. My younger son recently spent 1 year living in St. Croix, USVI. I decided to send him a care package of junk food (candy, cookies,etc.) because things are so expensive there. The package took 29 days only to be returned to me. As per tracker it spent 15 days sitting in Jacksonville, Fl. I specifically marked it to be held at his local Post Office because he did not get home delivery of mail. Sure enough the tracker informed me it was "out for delivery" the day it arrived in St. Croix. Then "addressee could not be located". Package was returned damaged. I foolishly went to my local P.O. to try to obtain some info. I remember the clerk telling me her mom was from St. Thomas, USVI. She the said," You know how they are down there" as she made a drinking motion with her hand. Kind of comical but sad.
Post: The future of mail and how it affects finances
Link to comment from January 4, 2026
Just a tiny correction if I may. State of NJ Pension has been frozen since 2011 - 14 years. I know because I retired in 2010. At that time, the COLA did not kick in for the first 2 years of retirement. Supposedly, once the pensions are funded at a certain level (80 % I think) the COLA will kick back in. Many think that level will never be reached.
Post: Enough Already
Link to comment from December 12, 2025
We have a 2021 Subaru Crosstrek w/ 39,000 miles. Purchased it new. Funny you should mention that direct injection engine. At 20,000 miles and again at 37,000 miles all the dashboard warning lights lit up while I was driving. Had to bring it to the dealer for servicing. Turns out there was carbon build up on the valves and cylinder heads. Had to be cleaned and runs great after the cleaning. Subaru has even put out a service bulletin to address the issue. I was first told problem may be related to poor quality gasoline. We exclusively use a well rated gasoline. Second time I was told it may be because of short trips, lack of highway driving, low mileage, etc. We put approx. 8000 miles per year on both our cars. I have had 4 other cars (Mazda, Nissan, Honda and Chevy) driven the same way using the same type of gas. I have never had a problem with carbon build up on any of those cars. Some independent research and a conversation with my regular mechanic points to the direct injection engine. Buyer beware.
Post: The Point of Diminishing Returns
Link to comment from December 4, 2025
We pay property taxes again and again because they fund recurring expenses. The cost of police and fire protection, street lights, garbage removal, sewers, court systems, jails, road maintenance, schools, etc., doesn't end because we paid property taxes this year. They need to be paid this year, next year and in the future. If I buy a new television or washing machine I pay the sales tax once and that's it - until I need a new one.
Post: Property taxes, our schools, our towns and seniors. Shared responsibility.
Link to comment from November 30, 2025
We live in Passaic County, NJ, in a township with a very good elementary school sysytem and a fair secondary school system. My youngest graduated high school in 2017. I have no problem funding our local school systems via property taxes. If property taxes are waived for a certain group others have to pick up the slack. We all benefit by having educated citizens. Presumably, we all have utilized the public school systems either for ourselves, our kids or both. With limited exceptions, I feel we all should share the costs.
Post: Property taxes, our schools, our towns and seniors. Shared responsibility.
Link to comment from November 29, 2025
Thank you Mark. I was cleared to drive and have been doing so since early September. I have/will continue to use NJ Transit for adventures and more mundane things like some doctor's appointments, library, etc. I've been driving for 50 plus years so its nice to leave the driving to others. One weird thing I must note. Almost everyone I tell about my transit adventures seems to cringe at the idea of using public transport. I'm in your camp about loving local bus (and soon train) service. I wonder if that just an "American thing"?
Post: What would you do if you couldn’t drive?
Link to comment from November 26, 2025