AUTHOR: Don Southworth on 6/24/2024 FIRST: DAN SMITH on 6/24/2024 | RECENT: Rick Connor on 6/24/2024
Comments
One of my challenges in getting older is not becoming the curmudgeon who tells people "back in my day...". My two sons would say I lost that battle when they were kids 30 years ago. My wife too! How many times have they heard my stories of working when I was 9, paying rent when I was 12, living without a bedroom until I was an adult. I love/hate the story of how the average house has doubled in size, while the average family is 50% smaller. Each generation has new challenges and new advantages. I can imagine the outrage from some when social security was introduced. I did it on my own; why is the government helping out. My kids couldn't buy a home in CA if they wanted to, even with two salaries. My wife and I, both without college degrees but both working full-time with kids, were able to do so when we were in our 20s. Our situation is both unique and the same as others our ages. Do people change or does our culture and society help influence differing priorities and desires. Dickens would say probably both. If I ran the world I would hope we focus less on financial gains and goodies and more on the spiritual and human goodies like love, friendship and joy. What worked for me may or may not work for you. And if you aren't a white, older, male you didn't/won't have the benefits I got that I had nothing to do with. New times mean new solutions. Less greed and more generosity and gratitude are always in season.
I feel for you Jonathan. My wife has gone through cancer twice and while the kindness and generosity of others (strangers and friends/family) far outweighed the other, the continuous unsolicited advice from personal experience was very ingrating and annoying. I have had the same thing happen with parenting challenges as well. In my more compassionate moments I try to remember that most of this comes from people's desire to be of help and care. One of the best parts of my ministerial training was the year I was a hospital chaplain. I came from the corporate world where I was rewarded for finding solutions to problems. In the hospital people don't want solutions, they want comfort, understanding and compassion. It took me a while but eventually I realized sitting with someone, listening or silently, was far more appreciated than my words of comfort or consul. A mantra for meditation and support to someone facing hard times is often, "Don't just do something, sit there." As always, sending love and peace.
The one thing I know 100% about social security is the only time I/we'll know when is the best time to start taking it is when both my wife and I are dead and we count backwards. Of course, when we are both dead nobody will care. We decided for her to take it when she retired 8 months before FRA and I'm planning on starting when I hit 70. Still 3 1/2 years away for me so that is always subject to change.
What did editors/writers/ministers do before the internet? This reminds me of when I was asked the source of a quote I had used in an essay that I had written for a book. I had gotten the quote for a sermon I had given a few years earlier but couldn't find the file. I googled the quote while at the library (while researching another sermon - old school for me!) and not only found the quote and its author, but also found my sermon, and many others I had given, preached by someone else - almost word for word. My words will never make it to Quote Investigator but I wonder how they (and editor/writers/ministers/etc) will manage in the growing world of Artificial Intelligence...
When my dad died 5 years ago he had about in silver coins that were worth around $8000 - less than half what he paid for them several years before. I sold all but a sleeve of them, mainly because I didn't want to deal with moving them across the country. Last year I sold the rest for almost twice what they were worth in 2019. No regrets because it was the easiest and it was "found" money. To be honest, if I had bought them I probably wouldn't have sold them at such a loss but since they were inherited it didn't feel like "real" money. (And for the record I would NEVER speculate on the silver market. A good friend lost hundreds of thousands during the Hunt debacle of the 1980s.)
Thanks Jeff. Your words made me reflect on the power of staying in the same location for a long time. I was rooted in California for the first 42 years of my life and then followed the call to ministry to Georgia and for the last 18 years, North Carolina. While I have many strong friendships but almost all of them are long distance. As we prepare to move back to California to be near our first grandchild, I'm looking forward to being close to family and old friends, but also knowing that the 24 years we've been gone will have us starting over a bit with new in-person friendships. "Starting over" at this point in life isn't as easy as it once was!
Thanks for the question Matt. I thought it would be fun to compare today with where we were on 1/1/21. My wife and I are 66. I do a little consulting and she retired last year. 2021 2024 Tax Deferred 68% 54%
Tax Exempt 19% 38%
Taxable 13% 8% By the time I turn 70 & start getting social security I'm hoping I'll be around 40/50/10 for tax deferred/tax exempt/taxable. One big advantage I have (which skews the numbers) is that as a retired minister I'm able to take an annual housing allowance from one of my tax deferred accounts tax free which makes it actually tax exempt $$. We only started doing Roth 6 years ago.
Thanks Mike. What a wonderful experience. I'm not Catholic either but Francis' life story, and the fact I was born & raised in San Francisco, made him impossible to ignore.
Comments
One of my challenges in getting older is not becoming the curmudgeon who tells people "back in my day...". My two sons would say I lost that battle when they were kids 30 years ago. My wife too! How many times have they heard my stories of working when I was 9, paying rent when I was 12, living without a bedroom until I was an adult. I love/hate the story of how the average house has doubled in size, while the average family is 50% smaller. Each generation has new challenges and new advantages. I can imagine the outrage from some when social security was introduced. I did it on my own; why is the government helping out. My kids couldn't buy a home in CA if they wanted to, even with two salaries. My wife and I, both without college degrees but both working full-time with kids, were able to do so when we were in our 20s. Our situation is both unique and the same as others our ages. Do people change or does our culture and society help influence differing priorities and desires. Dickens would say probably both. If I ran the world I would hope we focus less on financial gains and goodies and more on the spiritual and human goodies like love, friendship and joy. What worked for me may or may not work for you. And if you aren't a white, older, male you didn't/won't have the benefits I got that I had nothing to do with. New times mean new solutions. Less greed and more generosity and gratitude are always in season.
Post: How did it all work for us? Why not now?
Link to comment from September 27, 2024
I feel for you Jonathan. My wife has gone through cancer twice and while the kindness and generosity of others (strangers and friends/family) far outweighed the other, the continuous unsolicited advice from personal experience was very ingrating and annoying. I have had the same thing happen with parenting challenges as well. In my more compassionate moments I try to remember that most of this comes from people's desire to be of help and care. One of the best parts of my ministerial training was the year I was a hospital chaplain. I came from the corporate world where I was rewarded for finding solutions to problems. In the hospital people don't want solutions, they want comfort, understanding and compassion. It took me a while but eventually I realized sitting with someone, listening or silently, was far more appreciated than my words of comfort or consul. A mantra for meditation and support to someone facing hard times is often, "Don't just do something, sit there." As always, sending love and peace.
Post: Anybody Listening? by Jonathan Clements
Link to comment from September 27, 2024
The one thing I know 100% about social security is the only time I/we'll know when is the best time to start taking it is when both my wife and I are dead and we count backwards. Of course, when we are both dead nobody will care. We decided for her to take it when she retired 8 months before FRA and I'm planning on starting when I hit 70. Still 3 1/2 years away for me so that is always subject to change.
Post: Quinn asks himself, Is delaying Social Security to age 70 the right decision?
Link to comment from September 22, 2024
What did editors/writers/ministers do before the internet? This reminds me of when I was asked the source of a quote I had used in an essay that I had written for a book. I had gotten the quote for a sermon I had given a few years earlier but couldn't find the file. I googled the quote while at the library (while researching another sermon - old school for me!) and not only found the quote and its author, but also found my sermon, and many others I had given, preached by someone else - almost word for word. My words will never make it to Quote Investigator but I wonder how they (and editor/writers/ministers/etc) will manage in the growing world of Artificial Intelligence...
Post: Didn’t Say That by Jonathan Clements
Link to comment from September 20, 2024
I'm with Elaine on this one. But I'll drive an extra 10 miles to save 10 cents on a gallon of gas too!
Post: Getting Rolled by Jonathan Clements
Link to comment from September 18, 2024
When my dad died 5 years ago he had about in silver coins that were worth around $8000 - less than half what he paid for them several years before. I sold all but a sleeve of them, mainly because I didn't want to deal with moving them across the country. Last year I sold the rest for almost twice what they were worth in 2019. No regrets because it was the easiest and it was "found" money. To be honest, if I had bought them I probably wouldn't have sold them at such a loss but since they were inherited it didn't feel like "real" money. (And for the record I would NEVER speculate on the silver market. A good friend lost hundreds of thousands during the Hunt debacle of the 1980s.)
Post: Silver Coins
Link to comment from September 16, 2024
Thanks Jeff. Your words made me reflect on the power of staying in the same location for a long time. I was rooted in California for the first 42 years of my life and then followed the call to ministry to Georgia and for the last 18 years, North Carolina. While I have many strong friendships but almost all of them are long distance. As we prepare to move back to California to be near our first grandchild, I'm looking forward to being close to family and old friends, but also knowing that the 24 years we've been gone will have us starting over a bit with new in-person friendships. "Starting over" at this point in life isn't as easy as it once was!
Post: Friends at Every Turn
Link to comment from September 14, 2024
Thanks Matt- fixed!
Post: What’s your asset breakdown by tax treatment?
Link to comment from September 11, 2024
Thanks for the question Matt. I thought it would be fun to compare today with where we were on 1/1/21. My wife and I are 66. I do a little consulting and she retired last year. 2021 2024 Tax Deferred 68% 54% Tax Exempt 19% 38% Taxable 13% 8% By the time I turn 70 & start getting social security I'm hoping I'll be around 40/50/10 for tax deferred/tax exempt/taxable. One big advantage I have (which skews the numbers) is that as a retired minister I'm able to take an annual housing allowance from one of my tax deferred accounts tax free which makes it actually tax exempt $$. We only started doing Roth 6 years ago.
Post: What’s your asset breakdown by tax treatment?
Link to comment from September 11, 2024
Thanks Mike. What a wonderful experience. I'm not Catholic either but Francis' life story, and the fact I was born & raised in San Francisco, made him impossible to ignore.
Post: First Place by Jonathan Clements
Link to comment from September 7, 2024