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I consider myself a pretty ordinary guy living a normal, down-to-earth life. If you ever had the misfortune to meet me, you’d quickly realize there are no airs and graces about me. With that mental image in mind, you might understand my surprise when a fellow retiree I play sport with came out with: “how the other half live” after I mentioned booking a short break at a nice coastal hotel for me and my wife Suzie later in January.
I laughed it off, saying it was hardly a big deal. But his response stopped me cold: “Come on, Mark! I’ve only known you for a year or so and you’ve been away three times and spent last summer at your vacation home. That’s not a normal retirement.”
It got me thinking about how differently people perceive the same thing, and whether I’d somehow lost touch with what counts as ordinary. We sat down at a table for our usual after-game coffee and chat. Although we’d been playing racket sports together for a year, I’d never asked him what his former job was. Turns out he was a chef who retired because he couldn’t hack the unsociable hours anymore, and when his employer went bankrupt, he didn’t want to start looking for another job at 66.
He owns his home outright and used a portion of his savings to buy a new, reasonably priced, reliable car. The rest he’s carefully managing to provide a simple but worry-free retirement. Vacations and short breaks aren’t really on the agenda. Over coffee he explained that he’s happy and grateful, free to do what he wants without worrying about money or work anymore. The budget doesn’t stretch to expensive luxuries, and that’s absolutely fine with him.
His words stayed with me long after we’d finished our coffee. Here was someone genuinely content with what he had, while I’d been taking my own good fortune completely for granted.
That coastal hotel break with Suzie? I’m obviously still going, and I’ll enjoy every minute of it. But that three-night break I booked on a whim, without thinking about the price, might be another person’s entire luxury budget for six months. I’ll do it with a bit more gratitude and a lot less assumption that what I have is just “normal.” Sometimes it takes an offhand comment from a friend to remind you how lucky you actually are. Perspective is everything. I’m grateful my friend gently recalibrated mine.
It seems that what’s really under discussion here is not the “other half,” but more like the other fifteen, ten, or five percent.
Good one Chris, that idiom should probably be updated.
As i was driving through a neighboring town this morning, I thought of this post.
Although i don’t like to admit it, we are clearly in the other half- or so it seems.
The town i mention is among the wealthiest in the state. The homes are huge on large pieces of property. They are valued at $2-5 million and above and typical property taxes are around $50,000 a year. It is common for an older mansion to be torn down and a new one replace it. In three instances I know of the next door house was torn down just to make are larger lawn for the buyer.
If some of us are the other half, what the heck are these people?
$50k property tax, yikes!