Relationships are managed best with clear expectations. Start early. I arrived by plane to visit my first 2 ( of later 9) grandchildren. Their other grandparents were spenders. I'm a saver. The 2 year old asked " are there presents in your bag"? "No", I replied, " You have to make your own toys". So we found sticks, string, paper and metal paper clips, and made a trip to the dollar store for magnets. With our fishing poles and paper fish ( put the paper clip on your fish's mouth) we cast off from the top of the basement stairs into the ocean below. We played fishing everyday I was there. Now aged 12, my grandson still spontaneously remembers this. I'm not your bank machine. I'm your Nana. The best thing I'll ever give you is my time. ( and that's true of being a Mom too!)
Ah the joy of anticipation. My husband was a spontaneous person, and loved to surprise people. It took years to convince him that I had more joy in knowing plans as I could savour in advance as well as during and afterwards. This can apply to many no cost events, like walking a trail or having neighbours over for coffee. Eventually he stopped trying to surprise me ( and started surprising our children in law instead!)
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Relationships are managed best with clear expectations. Start early. I arrived by plane to visit my first 2 ( of later 9) grandchildren. Their other grandparents were spenders. I'm a saver. The 2 year old asked " are there presents in your bag"? "No", I replied, " You have to make your own toys". So we found sticks, string, paper and metal paper clips, and made a trip to the dollar store for magnets. With our fishing poles and paper fish ( put the paper clip on your fish's mouth) we cast off from the top of the basement stairs into the ocean below. We played fishing everyday I was there. Now aged 12, my grandson still spontaneously remembers this. I'm not your bank machine. I'm your Nana. The best thing I'll ever give you is my time. ( and that's true of being a Mom too!)
Post: What They Don’t Tell You About Retirement: Part 2 – Grandchildren Are Expensive
Link to comment from September 6, 2025
If you can be happy for others, you can have more happiness.
Post: What life lessons would you like to pass on to the next generation?
Link to comment from November 23, 2024
Ah the joy of anticipation. My husband was a spontaneous person, and loved to surprise people. It took years to convince him that I had more joy in knowing plans as I could savour in advance as well as during and afterwards. This can apply to many no cost events, like walking a trail or having neighbours over for coffee. Eventually he stopped trying to surprise me ( and started surprising our children in law instead!)
Post: My Spending Rules
Link to comment from September 29, 2024